Search found 6 matches

by shuten
Sat Jun 04, 2011 12:06 pm
Forum: Completed Games
Topic: Untold Myth 1st Tale -Earthbreaking Flight-
Replies: 17
Views: 35007

Re: Untold Myth 1st Tale -Earthbreaking Flight-

Congrats on finishing the VN.
now, grammar mistakes are common but otherwise, liking it very much, man. TOP STUFF.
by shuten
Thu Jan 20, 2011 1:40 am
Forum: Skill Development
Topic: Critique my writing, please.
Replies: 6
Views: 1096

Re: Critique my writing, please.

yes, yes I see. This is something I need to work on. Thank you
by shuten
Wed Jan 19, 2011 9:56 am
Forum: Skill Development
Topic: Critique my writing, please.
Replies: 6
Views: 1096

Re: Critique my writing, please.

I see. Hmm, I was intending for Ismail to be the sort of evil man who is formal most of the time, much like intelligent villains.
So, do you think I should give them a longer introduction or some sort?
by shuten
Tue Jan 18, 2011 3:51 pm
Forum: Skill Development
Topic: Critique my writing, please.
Replies: 6
Views: 1096

Re: Critique my writing, please.

It was a cold night in the desert. The freezing breeze was like needles piercing bones through skin. The gibbous moon gazed coldly down to the barren field of sand below, where only the strong survived. The Kulu Desert. It is beautiful, exotic, charming, but like all deserts, danger hides under its...
by shuten
Tue Jan 18, 2011 3:50 pm
Forum: Skill Development
Topic: Critique my writing, please.
Replies: 6
Views: 1096

Critique my writing, please.

Well, I'm still a newbie around here, but I've had some experience in writing. This is one of my old scripts, which I find to be a good example of my skill. Can you please take a look and give me an opinion on it? Here's the characters. Name: Ismail Bin Yusuf Age: Unknown (looks 17) Occupation: Ange...
by shuten
Fri Sep 10, 2010 5:04 pm
Forum: Completed Games
Topic: 1 Billion Rupiah Girl
Replies: 16
Views: 9816

Re: 1 Billion Rupiah Girl

thank you for all your posts. whether it is critique or positive encouragement. My name is shuten, and I am the storywriter for the next project it will be darker, as the concept story goes, and will be written in a better style, we promise. and will be longer indeed. in our defense, in the last con...