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 Post subject: Connection 1.2
PostPosted: Tue Apr 26, 2011 9:16 am 
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Joined: Sat Mar 26, 2011 2:42 pm
Posts: 27
Location: Sweden
Completed: Connection
First visual novel I've ever done, and since, well... After making, what else is there to it than sharing it? ^^;
I made this for an english assignment, first it was supposed to have another story (waaay different than it is now) but
started feeling meh/too long/too little time so I might save that one for later xD;;

Download/info can be reached here:
http://hakuzuki.wordpress.com/2011/04/26/visual-novel-connection/

(yes, I know the art is Meh ^^; )
Feedback is good stuff~

Being new and all here I hope I didn't do anything wrong >.<;


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 Post subject: Re: Connection 1.2
PostPosted: Tue Apr 26, 2011 9:30 am 
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Joined: Thu Mar 31, 2011 10:20 am
Posts: 629
Completed: Finding A Murderer, Memory Loss, Crime Investigation, Stay away from the graveyard, Last Day at School, Lonesome, Email, Hired Gun, Dusk, Hired Gun 2, Man-at-arms, Hired Gun 3, The Phantom Caller, Street Girl, Free love, The Story of Isabel Claudia
You have not made the game for windows.
Only for linux, why?

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 Post subject: Re: Connection 1.2
PostPosted: Tue Apr 26, 2011 9:44 am 
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Joined: Sat Mar 26, 2011 2:42 pm
Posts: 27
Location: Sweden
Completed: Connection
Okay, it seems like mediafire screwed up, allow me to fix it right this moment.
Thanks for telling me >.<;;;;;;;;
Links updated~!


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 Post subject: Re: Connection 1.2
PostPosted: Tue Apr 26, 2011 10:15 am 
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Joined: Mon Apr 11, 2011 5:31 pm
Posts: 426
Projects: Pickles and Strawberries
That was good, for a first vn. It was a bit more like a kinetic novel, but still ^_^


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 Post subject: Re: Connection 1.2
PostPosted: Tue Apr 26, 2011 4:06 pm 
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Joined: Sat Mar 26, 2011 2:42 pm
Posts: 27
Location: Sweden
Completed: Connection
Yeah, originally the story wasn't meant to be for a visual novel, so I guess I could blame it on that? ^^;
The first step got to be somewhere~


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 Post subject: Re: Connection 1.2
PostPosted: Thu May 05, 2011 5:58 am 
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Joined: Sun May 18, 2008 1:52 pm
Posts: 309
LOL at least one whose reverse the win/Linux/mac release issue :D well, I'll put your works on the topo of my backlog as special prize, stay tuned for rece and possible constructive criticism ;)


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 Post subject: Re: Connection 1.2
PostPosted: Tue May 17, 2011 11:13 pm 
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Joined: Sat May 14, 2011 6:24 pm
Posts: 8
Projects: Cloudscape
Well just got done playing it. I can appreciate the work you put into this, as a fellow VN writer. I do have some criticisms however.

The overall length of the VN/Kinetic Novel, to a fast reader like me, was only about 5 minuets for both paths. It was a rather short simple story that I enjoyed. I don't feel as it dragged on at any moment due to the short length. The music wasn't yours, so I don't have anything to comment to it. The art was alright, given the circumstances.

I know that it may sound harsh, but it's the truth. You have to start out somewhere, and this was a decent start.

EDIT: I'm sorry, I forgot to state my overall feelings on this KN/VN. I enjoyed it, I honestly did.


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 Post subject: Re: Connection 1.2
PostPosted: Wed May 18, 2011 5:54 am 
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Joined: Sat Mar 26, 2011 2:42 pm
Posts: 27
Location: Sweden
Completed: Connection
@Storytime with Des
Yeah, no worries, I had originally planned on doing a much longer story (with another genre and everything) but since it was in fact something for school (english assignment) it started to feel too long and dragged out, I was also unsure of how I wanted things to go ^^; But i'm thinking of picking that project up sometime and actually get someone that can draw better than me on the art part :3

It makes me happy to hear that you liked it ^_^ I actually didn't expect it to be as good as it is, so yea, a decent start :3


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 Post subject: Re: Connection 1.2
PostPosted: Thu May 19, 2011 1:19 am 
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Joined: Sat May 14, 2011 6:24 pm
Posts: 8
Projects: Cloudscape
@Najica

Well what was that story about?

Getting a team together would be nice. Having someone dedicated to the character art, while another does music can only lead to good things.


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 Post subject: Re: Connection 1.2
PostPosted: Thu May 19, 2011 11:36 am 
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Joined: Sat Mar 26, 2011 2:42 pm
Posts: 27
Location: Sweden
Completed: Connection
@Storytime with Des

It was a story slightly based on the song Aura from .hack//sign (lyrics here)

Well, shortly said, it's about two girls in an underground prison, none of the girls themselves has done any wrong; but their parents. The younger girl
has been in the prison since birth, while the other one got there sometime later in life. Both of them want to get out of there, but they are unsure of how (I could say a few ideas I got there, but in case I will do this project... I choose not to spoil ^^; )

Although, even if I will pick it up again I'm thinking of finishing the writing for all possible paths and such and then alt. search for people. This way, I can get opinions and such about it to see if the people interested wants to do it or not~ (Also that way I won't need to stress the writing proccess).


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 Post subject: Re: Connection 1.2
PostPosted: Thu May 19, 2011 2:03 pm 
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Joined: Tue Apr 06, 2010 2:57 am
Posts: 36
Well I played it, and I enjoyed it. First thing I did while playing was turn up the text speed as the default appears to be quite slow.

Both Connections and the game you just described seem to have major themes of loneliness and isolation. The "Good Ending" in Connections however was pretty cool.
I enjoy spirit type stuff, so I really enjoyed finding out that the main character was a wandering ghost. I also think that was a good take on how a ghost would be ^_^


I would guess that if you kept regularly drawing then in a couple years you would be quite exceptional yourself because you seem to have a pretty good foundation in place already.

All in all I think this is a good first project ^_^


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