Name Pending[Parenthood][BxG/B]

[Jate]

I'm just beginning to work on this, and I'd really appreciate everyone's thoughts. Most VNs I see are about school aged characters, including my own stories, so this is my attempt at going a bit beyond that. This story is about your typical unmotivated, slacker male protagonist - ten years later.

---

[Name pending] is celebrating his thirty-second birthday. He's single, has achieved little in his career, and is generally bored with life. But he doesn't mind so long as he makes enough money to support himself and has enough of a social life to go out for a beer every now and then. He's finally gotten over the love of his life, [name pending] his childhood best friend turned college girlfriend. After school she ran away to New York to pursue a career in Art, and he spent the better part of his twenties lamenting her absence.

But she comes back into his life, and out of it, with the arrival of a letter. She passed away, and left him her daughter - his daughter. And so [name pending] is thrust suddenly into the role of a father. He agrees to take the girl, and her younger half-brother on a probationary basis while they find a home for him, unless [name pending] decides to keep them both.

[Name pending] is a spirited 10-year-old with a short temper but a good heart, and surprising maturity for her age. [Name pending], called "Teddy" for his habit of talking through his bear, is a timid 5-year-old, even moreso after the loss of his mother. Through trying to raise them [name pending] learns to want more in life, and the meaning of real relationships, love, family, and all that nonsense.

--

The game will primarily be about the children, as the story progresses a few of the protagonist's friends and coworkers will get more involved, and will turn into love interests as the girl convinces the protagonist to start dating. The romance will be more about companionship than lust, and will be more on the mundane side than dramatic. As a whole I'm wanting the tone of the story to be warm and light hearted, hopefully with some humour, and not put an emphasis on the more dramatic parts of the story. I'd like this to have a feeling similar to Usagi Drop, a manga/anime that shares the new single father theme.

• So is this something that would interest you at all?
• Is there anything in particular you would like to see/not like to see in a story like this?
• I haven't put much thought into the love interests yet, of which there will be three females and two males. Do you have a character type you'd be interested in here? Would you like to see a broader age range or prefer it more late twenties ~ mid thirties?
• Any other thoughts/questions/concerns/suggestions?

---

Oh, and this will be a free VN.

[HiddenCreature]

I like the idea of a story focusing on parenting, which there currently aren't many. But it sounds like you want this to be more of a slice-of-life story, rather than a drama. The tone of the premise leans more towards the latter, in my opinion.

The only game I know of that resembles what you're going for is the Walking Dead game. A man in his thirties who doesn't have the best life and a few regrets, is suddenly given this role of a guardian. I found myself thinking in terms of a role model a few times, and trying to set a better moral example when given the chance. I think your story can accomplish something like that.

[fleet]

Interested concept, go for it! Some people will read it, some won't.

[Jate]

I like the idea of a story focusing on parenting, which there currently aren't many. But it sounds like you want this to be more of a slice-of-life story, rather than a drama. The tone of the premise leans more towards the latter, in my opinion.

It could certainly be written as a drama, but that's not a genre that interests me if it's not paired with horror or adventure, nor do I think You could say that it's meant to be a SoL in the literal sense, rather than a comedy in a daily setting as the term is often used. I'm not writing it as a drama nor a comedy, but with a bit of both while just following the protagonist's life.

[Lisistrata]

I love the idea! It sounds just like something I might be interested in.

Would you like to see a broader age range or prefer it more late twenties ~ mid thirties?

I like midthirties, but lately I'm more inclined towards older LIs. And having a choice between two genders for a male protagonist is always nice.

[SinnyROM]

I like to see more stories involving parents more so this definitely catches my eye. If it was up to me, the reader would be able to see both the children and father's thoughts equally, but it may be confusing to readers who're used to one point of view. What you have now is fine.

I thought of Usagi Drop when I read your summary, which is great - the premise is endearing. As long as there's none of that later plot where

the child ends up falling in love with the non-biological dad and marriage happens

there's no complaints from me!

As for love interests, there aren't many that are older men. I would like to see even older, as Lisistrata pointed out. Maybe have one who's in their forties/fifties, and I'll be satisfied. A choice between their gender is a good idea because you can explore parenting from different perspectives and the possible stigma gay relationships have on the children.

Looking forward to this!

[gekiganwing]

So is this something that would interest you at all?

Yes. As you said, adult protagonists aren't as common as they could be. I've seen some adult heroines in plot-driven visual novels. In my opinion, adult heroes don't seem all that rare.

Is there anything in particular you would like to see/not like to see in a story like this?

* The main character having to re-learn work/life balance.
* MC interacting with coworkers. Some of them want him to find a significant other, while others don't care.
* Asking what it means to be a good parent.

I haven't put much thought into the love interests yet, of which there will be three females and two males. Do you have a character type you'd be interested in here? Would you like to see a broader age range or prefer it more late twenties ~ mid thirties?

Overall, I'd recommend thinking about interesting people for the main character to interact with. Think about whether they can be described with just a couple words -- "career girl" or "art guy." Also, think about how to write them as individuals with their own goals, conflicts, and so on.

Does the MC have intimate, reliable friends? If he only has casual acquaintances, then he might want to talk with someone about serious matters. Consider whether your story will benefit by including a platonic friendship route.

The theme of arrested development as a psychological problem. I can imagine that the main character sometimes thinks he's stuck in the past, and that he hesitates to consider himself a mature person. What does he think of other people who are insecure about their maturity? How would he talk to someone who's trying to grow up quickly?

How would the main character relate to people such as...

* An introverted, average-looking woman who's had few dates or long term relationships. This has left her unhappy and embarrassed, but she's determined that she will not be defined by her status as a single woman.
* A man who's become his friend through meetups and activities. He wants the main character to date his sister. She's currently living with him and enduring an frustrating post-college job. She doesn't want a matchmaker, especially one from her family.
* A man who had a girlfriend for several years, and who is currently single and bisexual.

Any other thoughts/questions/concerns/suggestions?

Write what you want. If you need help, then be sure to ask.

[Jate]

Thanks for the great responses! I'll think about your comments.

I like to see more stories involving parents more so this definitely catches my eye. If it was up to me, the reader would be able to see both the children and father's thoughts equally, but it may be confusing to readers who're used to one point of view. What you have now is fine.

While you won't see the children's thoughts, you'll certainly hear a lot of them. The daughter is the type without a filter, and will be very blunt and straightforward with what she has to say. The son not so much, but I'm hoping the player/protagonist will feel compelled to try and draw him out of his shell and find out who he is because of that.

I've been fleshing out the LI's more and so far the plan is to have one older male and one older female. The female won't be a big gap, late thirties. The male will be the oldest, probably mid fourties. He might wind up being a bit Tom Sellecky.

I'll give a proper description of all the characters later, but I'm going to wait until they're more complete, and until I have art to show along with them. At that point I'll probably start a new thread in WIP.

Oh, it definitely won't end like Usagi Drop, no need to worry there!

* MC interacting with coworkers. Some of them want him to find a significant other, while others don't care.

There won't be very many coworkers in the story due to the rather isolated setup of his workplace, and the protagonist's lack of much social drive. The two he interacts with the most, his cubicle mate and supervisor (the older female), are both LIs. The cubicle mate has been left pretty bitter on the "signifacnt other" side of the relationship spectrum after his divorce, but he will encourage the protagonist to find romance on a more casual level. The supervisor somewhat fits

An introverted, average-looking woman who's had few dates or long term relationships. This has left her unhappy and embarrassed, but she's determined that she will not be defined by her status as a single woman.

this, if you were to change introverted to extroverted. Outside of the two of them, most coworkers don't care about the protagonist rather than not caring about his lovelife specifically.

Though not having a lot of minor characters isn't specific to his work. When I'm working on stories I frequently go overboard on cast, and I'm going to try to avoid that here. If I let it get too big I won't be able to manage it.

Does the MC have intimate, reliable friends? If he only has casual acquaintances, then he might want to talk with someone about serious matters. Consider whether your story will benefit by including a platonic friendship route.

In the beginning, no. He's never had, nor desired, intimate friendships. As a part of his growth he starts wanting to form tighter bonds, and progresses on that throughout the story. There will be at least one platonic route, but I wouldn't really call it a friendship route, as it'll be as much a family route.

Write what you want. If you need help, then be sure to ask.

I've been thinking a lot about getting a co-writer, so I almost certainly will be asking for help.