A Scent Of Rubine (Otome, Romance, Comedy)

[FDQ]

Being unemployed is boring as hell, so I decided to give it a try with making a visual novel. So far it's only an project and I have not started with the actual game yet, only characters and plot. So far I'm working alone, but will eventually need to hire a CG artist, BG artist and a music composer. The rest will be myself. By the way, I'm not a native english speaker, so I apologize if I make errors in my writing here XD

PLOT

Hikari is a borderline obsessive fan of the newcomer jrock band RUBINE. Before one of their concerts, she manages to sneak backstage in order to meet her idols.
She sneaks around looking for either of the six band members, when suddenly a man spots her and calls for her. Hikari naturally panics and tries to hurry away, causing quite a commotion in her attempted escape.
She heads for the first door she sees, unaware that she is about to come face to face with her idols.
Inside the room all six members are preparing for the night's show. She is frozen with awe amd before she can comprehend, the man has caught up to her. He introduces himself as the manager of the band and tells her that she is just what he has been looking for.
The original actress for RUBINEs upcoming music video, has just called and cancelled and Hikari is just the kind of girl who would be perfect for the role!


CHARACTERS

Hikari Saito (protagonist)
Birthday: July 2
Height: 157 cm.
Blood type: AB.
Favorite season: All of them.
Favorite color: Blush pink.
Favorite food: Strawberry ice cream.
Favorite animal: Cats.
Hobbies: Watching movies.
Favorite hangout: Downtown.
Very open minded.
Sometimes spacy or random.
Has a mind that tends to wander.

Ranmaru Uchida (aka. Midori)

Birthday: May 30.
Height: 169 cm.
Blood type: A.
Favorite season: Winter.
Favorite color: Yellow.
Favorite food: Cheeseburger.
Favorite animal: Owls.
Hobbies: Play video games. Karaoke.
Favorite hangout: The arcade.

Urahara Shibata (aka. Gin)

Birthday: April 19.
Height: 161 cm.
Blood type: A.
Favorite season: Spring and summer.
Favorite color: Magenta and blue.
Favorite food: Sweets.
Favorite animal: Horses.
Hobbies: Listen to music. Sing.
Favorite hangout: The coffee shop.

Bunta Ando (aka. Akai)

Birthday: October 26.
Height: 180 cm.
Blood type: O.
Favorite season: Spring.
Favorite color: Orange.
Favorite food: Sushi.
Favorite animal: Lions.
Hobbies: Shopping. Reading romance novels.
Favorite hangout: The mall.

Isuna Hashimoto (aka. Aoi)

Birthday: December 4.
Height: 170 cm.
Blood type: O.
Favorite season: Fall.
Favorite color: Blue.
Favorite food: Ramen and cupcakes.
Favorite animal: Pandas.
Hobbies: Drawing and painting. Baking cupcakes.
Favorite hangout: At home.

Nagato Shibata (aka. Kin)

Birthday: April 19.
Height: 162 cm.
Blood type: A.
Favorite season: Fall and winter.
Favorite color: Grey.
Favorite food: Pizza.
Favorite animal: Turtles.
Hobbies: Listen to music. Write poetry.
Favorite hangout: The coffee shop.

Eiichiro Kimura (aka. Murasaki)

Birthday: September 28.
Height: 178 cm.
Blood type: B.
Favorite season: Summer.
Favorite color: Red.
Favorite food: Steak.
Favorite animal: Dogs.
Hobbies: Soccer. Cooking.
Favorite hangout: The Park.


NOTES
- The band name RUBINE is a word made up of the first letter of each of the members given names.
- Each member represents a color while in character
- None of the RUBINE members have yet been publically seen without their masks, which means they can walk the street without being recognized by fans or media.
- Kuroi has been changed to Murasaki because the colors were too similar to Gin's.


CHARACTER SHEETS
Only 4 character sheets are done so far, still need to make the masks for the remaining two members.
The resolution is a little small on these pics so it's hard to see the tears on the crying facial expressions. Sorry about that.

[riiko08]

Cool title you got there! And the sprites look good as well.

Now for my thoughts. To be honest, the plot is very weak and too cliche. Girl bumping into famous guys then suddenly becomes their friend is just too boring and meh. Perhaps you can think of something else that will make it more interesting?

And regarding the on-stage look... are they cross dressing or something?

[Ran08]

Oh, you're the one who was asking for an opinion on the logo the other day! I think you've made a really nice choice. That logo sure is eye-catching. <3

Kyaaaaa, the boys are super cute! I especially like Aoi~ Well, I like aoi, I like the fall, I like eating and baking cupcakes, I like pandas, and I love staying at home. I think Aoi and I are going to be good friends!

Plot-wise, though, I kinda have to agree with riiko08 here. I think it's highly unlikely that she'll just bump into a boyband like that, and even more unlikely that they'll become friends just after that one meeting. (I mean, just imagine how many fans would be bumping into them on purpose if it came out that you can befriend them that way! Hahaha.) I'm all for fluffy scenes, though, so I could actually overlook that if this is just going to be a non-serious (no drama and all romance) game, but it still would be better if their connection was better defined from the start. (Like, for example:

She bumps into them on their way there, and while they're leaving [with their bodyguards and stuff, haha] she realizes that "omg I just bumped into RubiNe?! *asdfghjkl*" She rushes over to the venue, but while looking for the CR, she gets lost in the backstage and winds up in their room, where they mistake her for their new assistant, before realizing that, "wait, aren't you the girl from before?")

Hahahaha, something like that. Basically, making the one-time event into a series of events leading up to how they met would make the connection stronger than if you just had them bump into each other. =)

Anyway... I'm looking forward to this game! It looks really cute, hahaha. Good luck!

[FDQ]

I do agree, the plot is indeed cliche and I'm still working on it to be honest. Perhaps she could be an intern or work at some place where the band shows up some day. I'll have to think hard on this 'cause I want it to be kinda different, yet "familiar".

Or I could just go all the way with comedy and make her super obsessed and sneak backstage lol

And about the crossdressing, only Ranmaru will be feminine like the pic. The others will be more boyish. I just finished the on-stage look for Isuna (Aoi) too.

[Ran08]

That could be it! Hahaha. The funnier it is, the more memorable it would be. And the more memorable it is, the better the experience for the players. At least, for me.

OH MY GOSH, HE'S SO LOVELY. <3 So mysterious~ Aaaaaah. Can't wait! :""")

[FDQ]

UPDATE:
- Kuroi has been changed to Murasaki instead due to his original colors being too similar to Gin's.
- Plot has been updated (hopefully for the better)
- 4 character sheets are done with members facial expressions and autographs.
- More details added to Gin's and Aoi's on-stage look.
- Akai now has heterochromia.
- Plot will now focus more on comedy instead of drama.

[Kkoro]

I really think the plot change is an interesting improvement.

Also, maybe the WiP section is better for this thread ^^'

[Lyhra]

Are you still working on this? Looks pretty interesting.