Lemma Soft Forums

Supporting creators of visual novels and story-based games since 2003.


Visit our new games list, blog aggregator, IRC, and wiki.
Activation problem? Email [email protected]
It is currently Thu Jun 20, 2013 1:43 am

All times are UTC - 5 hours [ DST ]




Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 85 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6  Next
Author Message
PostPosted: Fri Mar 09, 2012 2:30 am 
Veteran
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 28, 2009 8:40 pm
Posts: 291
Completed: Love Like No Other
Projects: Sweet Sixteen; Gamelicious
*I swear I didn't copy the name of a certain anime's episode xD But after hours, DAYS of brainstorming... this is the best I can come up with... Any suggestions are welcomed (before the completion of the logo lol*


Planning phase seems longer than I expected! *Phew*

After more than a week of 'intensive' planning, I *still* don't have a title for this VN, but at least there're a few options... XD


But I *do* have (at least) character art's sketch, and the story done. 12 scenes, script is 2/12 done *hurray...?*

Thought of not posting anything unless I managed to finish this one time, but changed my mind now so I could ask for input from everyone.

Character Sketch
Image

Brief Descriptions
The plot;
AU Bangkok, some time in the future; Ratana and her friends were shopping in the new shopping complex where earthquake and tsunami attacked - flooding the lower floors. Mudslide and skimmed building materials caused top floor to crash down - trapping everyone inside the building, waiting for rescue. However, with such a large scale tsunami, they are not the only ones needing help...

Ratana
The MC from Gamelicious! Two years younger than in the main storyline, she is still equally short tempered and tomboyish. Even in this story, she is already an EKO fan.

Satria
An Indonesian elective medical student doing his selective module in Thai. He is very passionate about his chosen career, with a natural helpful personality to boost. He tends to be childish and ignorant of how his childish behaviours tend to attract unwanted attention...

Eun
One of Ratana's best friends. She's half American. She's also happy-go-lucky, fashionable, pretty and knows she's pretty. She tends to rely a lot of Ratana and Kanya but is fiercely loyal to them.

Kanya
Another of Ratana's best friend, and Eun's cousin. She's the matured and motherly one of the three. She's also a long time volunteer with St John's Ambulance, and a trained swimmer.



The story will be told, alternating between Ratana and Soe's POV. I'm hoping this will not be an issue, or cause any confusion! >_<
Mock-up of dialogue box as follows; (the headshot are borrowed, not actual image xD)
Image


Any feedbacks are welcomed!
Especially interested to know if;
1. You think having the story told from alternating POV will be confusing...
2. Any suggestions/opinions on character designs and descriptions
3. Suggestion on how to improve the dialogue box
4. The story will be something that you'd want to read about. It's more of a crisis survival (fictional natural disaster xD)
5. ... You'll want to play the finished game! XD


Game arts by Go-it (Nellie's tablet is dead atm T_T). That explains why the art is better than the original game lol...
GUI by Nellie and Eddie.
Story by Nellie.
Script by Nightydreams and Nellie.
Coding by Esther.
BGM by Ziassan
Proofreading and editing by Nightydreams (still recruiting)

_________________
Image Image


Last edited by Nellie on Fri Mar 16, 2012 4:00 am, edited 3 times in total.

Report this post
Top
 Profile Send private message  
Reply with quote  
PostPosted: Fri Mar 09, 2012 4:54 am 
Veteran
User avatar

Joined: Mon Sep 12, 2011 1:51 am
Posts: 331
Projects: Fairy Tales of Innocent Children
Whoah, what a great premise! I'm currently in the planning stages for a survival-based game myself, so I'm definitely interested in a story about surviving after a tsunami. It's a very current topic too, what with all the natural disasters that've happened lately, especially the most recent tsunami/earthquakes in Japan.

Alternating PoVs shouldn't be a problem as long as you keep the voices distinct. Whatever makes the story more exciting.

Love the art, by the way. Looks very polished.

_________________
Adversity Comp (2012): Review Guide


Report this post
Top
 Profile Send private message  
Reply with quote  
PostPosted: Fri Mar 09, 2012 12:25 pm 
Veteran
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 28, 2009 8:40 pm
Posts: 291
Completed: Love Like No Other
Projects: Sweet Sixteen; Gamelicious
Revised sketch of Soe and Ratana! :)
Image
Ratana has longer hair back then ;)

@Anarchy - The original idea was to have it following the Thailand 2011 flood... But after 5 hours of reading up on it, I gave up the research and create an AU universe with a near future setting =3 I guess the 11 March 2011 tsunami in Japan gave me some ideas as well xD Thanks for the encouragement and inputs; and good luck with your game!! :)

_________________
Image Image


Report this post
Top
 Profile Send private message  
Reply with quote  
PostPosted: Fri Mar 09, 2012 4:17 pm 
Veteran
User avatar

Joined: Fri Jan 06, 2012 11:38 am
Posts: 285
Location: Germany
Projects: Yakuza Blossom
Mhhh mhhh...amazing.
But I have a question, are you going to mention this in 'Gamelicious'? because you said here she will be two years younger.
Such a trauma will stay for a while or not? xD

I am curious to see what you make out of it^^

_________________
Own project:
Image


Report this post
Top
 Profile Send private message  
Reply with quote  
PostPosted: Fri Mar 09, 2012 4:39 pm 
Writing Maniac
User avatar

Joined: Tue Nov 11, 2003 8:51 am
Posts: 2090
Location: Germany
Completed: Metropolitan Blues, The Loyal Kinsman, Daemonophilia, The Dreaming, The Thirteenth Year, Adrift, Bionic Heart 2
Projects: The Pilgrim's Path, Elspeth's Garden, Secret Adventure Game!
Organization: Tall Tales Productions
Uwaah, so shiny art! AND an interesting premise! Why is everybody making NaNoRenO games that are so much better than the ones I made?

_________________
Scriptwriter and producer of Metropolitan Blues
Creator of The Loyal Kinsman

Scriptwriter and director of Daemonophilia
Scriptwriter and director of The Dreaming

Scriptwriter of Zenith Chronicles
Scriptwriter and director of The Thirteenth Year

Writer for Pet Project II: Heavy Petting
Scriptwriter and producer of Adrift

More about me in my blog
"Adrift - Like Ever17, but without the Deus Ex Machina" - HigurashiKira


Report this post
Top
 Profile Send private message  
Reply with quote  
PostPosted: Fri Mar 09, 2012 5:10 pm 
Miko-Class Veteran
User avatar

Joined: Mon Dec 21, 2009 10:00 am
Posts: 807
Location: Mountains
Organization: Autumn Eclectic
Great premise? Interesting characters? AWESOME art? Sold already! I love the dialogue box you have chosen as well, very nice. I am assuming the names go into the tab and the "Save" and such buttons in the slots, correct?

I like what you have come up with so far, it sounds extremely impressive.

_________________


Report this post
Top
 Profile Send private message  
Reply with quote  
PostPosted: Fri Mar 09, 2012 11:13 pm 
Veteran
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 28, 2009 8:40 pm
Posts: 291
Completed: Love Like No Other
Projects: Sweet Sixteen; Gamelicious
@ShadowBerry - Hi again, you're officially Gamelicious!'s no. 1's follower... I'll be sure you send a postcard when it's printed =3

And yes, this story will have some impacts on Gamelicious!... Mainly why is she doing nursing and
why the heck is she using hair band with two bells when she's not a kitten xD


@Taleweaver - Thanks, I'm taking that as a compliment! But better than the ones you made? If I can write half as well as you... I'll be... I dunno... Writing more? Lol... I hope I won't disappoint you xD

@Bane Reiko - Yes, you guessed right. The textbox and all GUI are still prototypes, won't won't be working too much on them... Until the scripts are done at least xD I believe I can still polish them in April? =3 Thanks for your encouragement! :)



Attached the concept art for the logo... Final fantasy fans might find something fishy about it xD But I'll confess... I stole their ideas xD
Please let me know what do you think about it... I kinda want to include human silhouettes (yea, like the FF logos lol) but I can't seem to do that D=
Any suggestions and inputs on how to improve it is greatly appreciated!!! Thanks in advanced :)


Attachments:
File comment: Logo concept art
spiral destiny comcept.jpg
spiral destiny comcept.jpg [ 116.29 KiB | Viewed 2420 times ]

_________________
Image Image
Report this post
Top
 Profile Send private message  
Reply with quote  
PostPosted: Sat Mar 10, 2012 6:48 am 
Veteran
User avatar

Joined: Fri Jan 06, 2012 11:38 am
Posts: 285
Location: Germany
Projects: Yakuza Blossom
Yay! ^3^ *wears a Fan t-shirt*
Heh, okay got that one with the nursing, seems pretty obvious xD

Mhh I prefer the first Logo. Sprial Destiny sounds better than Spiral of Destiny if you ak me xD
Human silhouette? well...in Final Fantasy I liked it because they had fight poses, how do YOU wanna make it in this game? xD

_________________
Own project:
Image


Report this post
Top
 Profile Send private message  
Reply with quote  
PostPosted: Sat Mar 10, 2012 5:09 pm 
Miko-Class Veteran
User avatar

Joined: Mon Dec 21, 2009 10:00 am
Posts: 807
Location: Mountains
Organization: Autumn Eclectic
Hmn... I like both titles, but the first logo seems to look better to me. I think it is the underlining that gives it a little more of an eye catching appeal.

I think I lean more toward the second title myself, but the first is a very close second.

((and HMN this reminds me of a certain SOMETHING XD Though that is not a bad thing in the least for me))

_________________


Report this post
Top
 Profile Send private message  
Reply with quote  
PostPosted: Sun Mar 11, 2012 12:57 am 
Veteran
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 28, 2009 8:40 pm
Posts: 291
Completed: Love Like No Other
Projects: Sweet Sixteen; Gamelicious
@ShadowBerry - I won't have fight poses... I'll have... some other cool poses xD Lol... Will play around with it and see what I can do. I really want a COOL logo as it would DEFINE the project (to an extent lol)

@Bane Reiko - Thanks for your input! I guess the general census is that the double lines is better xD Gonna get something more than a sketch done soon to determine if the logo is good... Hey, it shouldn't remind you of anything... XD :mrgreen:



Attached lined sprites of Eun! Feedback please! :)

Now in the process of adding choices into the story... As well as giving it TONS of bad ends =3


Attachments:
TestEun.jpg
TestEun.jpg [ 280.36 KiB | Viewed 2300 times ]

_________________
Image Image
Report this post
Top
 Profile Send private message  
Reply with quote  
PostPosted: Sun Mar 11, 2012 10:59 am 
Veteran
User avatar

Joined: Fri Jan 06, 2012 11:38 am
Posts: 285
Location: Germany
Projects: Yakuza Blossom
Yeah I wanna see what you make out of it ^___^
*nod*

Mgg the first and the last sprite are the same or not? xD
Well, make it a lil dirty because when everything breaks down I bet she will get a lil dirt on her xD

_________________
Own project:
Image


Report this post
Top
 Profile Send private message  
Reply with quote  
PostPosted: Sun Mar 11, 2012 11:33 am 
Veteran
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 28, 2009 8:40 pm
Posts: 291
Completed: Love Like No Other
Projects: Sweet Sixteen; Gamelicious
@ShadowBerry - The last one is just her in her clothes still clean xD

Yea, there will be variations of when their clothes/hair are still neat, tidy and dry; and when they got wet and dirty =3
At least... I will try to. Definitely in the final version, but maybe not on first release (1st April lol)

Working on more GUI and logo concepts!

Script word count = 1355... Scene summary word count = 6322... Urgh... I hate script writing

_________________
Image Image


Report this post
Top
 Profile Send private message  
Reply with quote  
PostPosted: Sun Mar 11, 2012 3:49 pm 
Miko-Class Veteran
User avatar

Joined: Mon Dec 21, 2009 10:00 am
Posts: 807
Location: Mountains
Organization: Autumn Eclectic
I like the sprite examples! AND CONGRATS ON GETTING THIS FAR!

_________________


Report this post
Top
 Profile Send private message  
Reply with quote  
PostPosted: Sun Mar 11, 2012 9:24 pm 
Veteran
User avatar

Joined: Sat Jan 28, 2012 10:25 pm
Posts: 205
Location: Hinamizawa
Completed: Tell Her a Story (Nano 2012), In This Dream of Ours
Organization: ouroboros[connect], Team ANARKY
Wow, I love that this is a prequel to Gamelicious! I like the survival plot, too. Will there be more than one ending? Maybe even some bad endings?

A story from alternating POVs won't be confusing, although I prefer when the same exact events aren't being told from another POV. Like, different POVs continuing the plot - not telling their own versions of it. I don't have suggestions about the dialogue box, but I'm definitely looking forward to playing the game! :D

_________________
Main Website * Tumblr
Play: In This Dream of Ours (5/7/2012)
Working on: Skylines, Dream's Dénouement, The Girl in Red
ouroborosconnect.com


Report this post
Top
 Profile Send private message  
Reply with quote  
PostPosted: Sun Mar 11, 2012 11:57 pm 
Veteran
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 28, 2009 8:40 pm
Posts: 291
Completed: Love Like No Other
Projects: Sweet Sixteen; Gamelicious
@Bane Reiko - Thanks!! It's most like yours that encourage me to go this far! XD

@kaleidofish - Yea, there will be multiple 'bad' ends =3 And only one 'good/true' end. Sounds pretty depressing, huh? >_< Good luck when playing and try not to die xD
Also, the story will continue moving forward and not about the same event even though it's from different POV :)

More sprite updates!


Attachments:
TestRatana.jpg
TestRatana.jpg [ 619.61 KiB | Viewed 2161 times ]
TestEun2.jpg
TestEun2.jpg [ 332.67 KiB | Viewed 2161 times ]

_________________
Image Image
Report this post
Top
 Profile Send private message  
Reply with quote  
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 85 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6  Next

All times are UTC - 5 hours [ DST ]


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You can reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Search for:
Protected by Anti-Spam ACP
Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group