Search found 17 matches

by phantmoftheomsi
Sat Apr 02, 2022 1:53 pm
Forum: Asset Creation: Writing
Topic: Have you ever made a Visual Novel with multiple POV characters?
Replies: 5
Views: 3288

Re: Have you ever made a Visual Novel with multiple POV characters?

I'm working on a VN right now with a detective and his footman at a royal palace and we split between the perspectives of the two. This works into the story because the detective has keen powers of perception and can interpret evidence and interviews one way, while the footman has a history at the p...
by phantmoftheomsi
Sat Apr 02, 2022 1:47 pm
Forum: Asset Creation: Writing
Topic: What do you consider a good first-person narrative?
Replies: 4
Views: 3592

Re: What do you consider a good first-person narrative?

If you're simply starting the first draft, my advice would be to write from whatever perspective feels natural. Once you have a completed first draft, you can change perspective without simultaneously trying to compose the narrative, and it will probably feel much easier. Third person vs first perso...
by phantmoftheomsi
Tue Nov 30, 2021 4:29 pm
Forum: Asset Creation: Writing
Topic: Is my protagonist too good to be true?
Replies: 7
Views: 5033

Re: Is my protagonist too good to be true?

Thanks, everyone, for the feedback. After mulling it over a little more, I think the judge in question is a good candidate for a messiah complex. He became emotionally invested in a case early in his career and lost his impartiality and issued a harmful ruling. Since then he has been very strict abo...
by phantmoftheomsi
Tue Nov 30, 2021 4:05 pm
Forum: Asset Creation: Writing
Topic: Is my protagonist too good to be true?
Replies: 7
Views: 5033

Re: Is my protagonist too good to be true?

I'd argue that even if this is true in the tellings of his story, almost certainly this was not the way the character was in truth. No real person begins their career fully self-actualized (even if they later make it seem that way). We all have some stumblings. It's part of being human. Certainly t...
by phantmoftheomsi
Tue Nov 30, 2021 3:53 pm
Forum: Asset Creation: Writing
Topic: Is my protagonist too good to be true?
Replies: 7
Views: 5033

Re: Is my protagonist too good to be true?

A protagonist being non ambiguous is not a problem. If anything non ambiguity allows the reader to self insert more. Why would you think otherwise? I'm not sure what you mean by non ambiguity. It's the ambiguity of his motives I'm attempting to resolve. If a character's motives are not defined, it'...
by phantmoftheomsi
Sat Nov 27, 2021 2:08 pm
Forum: Asset Creation: Writing
Topic: Is my protagonist too good to be true?
Replies: 7
Views: 5033

Is my protagonist too good to be true?

I've encountered an unexpected problem while drafting a story based on real law enforcement officials from Medieval China and it has me thinking I should switch protagonists. The story is about a judge who embodies the ideals of impartiality and fairness, and a police official who stops at nothing t...
by phantmoftheomsi
Sat Nov 27, 2021 1:36 pm
Forum: Asset Creation: Writing
Topic: World Building - Too much or too little? (Fantasy Genre)
Replies: 9
Views: 6676

Re: World Building - Too much or too little? (Fantasy Genre)

As a writer, I'm more plot-oriented than world-oriented, so I may not have the best perspective. But I agree with Lochana that the primary goal should be to finish the first draft of the story, then use that as a foundation, if only because you don't now what's missing until you know what's already ...
by phantmoftheomsi
Thu Nov 04, 2021 1:00 am
Forum: Ren'Py Questions and Announcements
Topic: Line Breaks
Replies: 9
Views: 11946

Re: Line Breaks

I tried \n and got an infinite loop.

Is this method for a line break still viable? I noticed this post is 15 years old and the engine may have been updated.
by phantmoftheomsi
Tue Nov 02, 2021 12:24 am
Forum: Asset Creation: Writing
Topic: How would you write a crying scene?
Replies: 9
Views: 4489

Re: How would you write a crying scene?

That was fantastic. Strong emotional core, steady buildup of tension and an intense moment of release. The layers you describe work great and show a strong understanding of your protagonist. Good job. As far as how to articulate the crying, I'd love to see what it is like for the sprite of Sophie to...
by phantmoftheomsi
Sat Oct 30, 2021 4:52 am
Forum: Asset Creation: Writing
Topic: Looking for feedback on a story idea
Replies: 6
Views: 4408

Re: Looking for feedback on a story idea

It's a bit jarring to go from coroner to gang-buster. You could logically link them together, but the difference in style and overtones creates too much dissonance. It might be compelling if a fellow coroner was to blame to the discrepancies, which creates a personal motivation for the main characte...
by phantmoftheomsi
Sat Oct 30, 2021 4:22 am
Forum: Asset Creation: Writing
Topic: Is the “it was all a dream” trope generally disliked?
Replies: 13
Views: 9639

Re: Is the “it was all a dream” trope generally disliked?

It's definitely used by lazy writers for a shocking plot twist, but it's also a foundational plot point in Dune and part of Paul's struggle is understanding whether or not the dream he just experienced is fated to become reality. So it cuts both ways.
by phantmoftheomsi
Sat Oct 30, 2021 4:16 am
Forum: Asset Creation: Writing
Topic: Structuring a story with the Hero's Journey
Replies: 2
Views: 4549

Re: Structuring a story with the Hero's Journey

That's a pretty clear summary. I liked the many examples you shared. In my experience with Campbell's theories, I have found them less useful as an outline tool and more useful as a revising tool, retrofitting the plot to Campbell's structure once I have all the elements from a completed first draft...
by phantmoftheomsi
Sat Oct 30, 2021 4:01 am
Forum: Asset Creation: Writing
Topic: What do you focus on in your second draft?
Replies: 10
Views: 6838

Re: What do you focus on in your second draft?

I usually focus on anything that takes me out of the story, like dialogue that feels forced, repetitive story beats, exposition dumps, or plot developments that amount to low-hanging fruit. I usually can't do this effectively without a break between drafts, typically a few weeks or months. My most c...
by phantmoftheomsi
Sat Oct 30, 2021 3:47 am
Forum: Asset Creation: Writing
Topic: How would you write a crying scene?
Replies: 9
Views: 4489

Re: How would you write a crying scene?

What's the context around the crying scene? If it just suddenly happens, that may be why it feels flat. If there's a reason it would be unexpected or unfortunate, that could have more of an emotional impact on the player. This could be accomplished by adding plot indicators that the character is usu...