Crazy to be Famous ~Supernatural VN~ UPDATED :)

[lilyalex]

This is my first VN, so I am still practicing with my game-making skills. I would appreciate comments on both story and writing though!

Title: Pegasus
In poetry, the phrase "I'm mounting my Pegasus" means that the poet is going to write
(s/he's becoming inspired)
"I'm on my Pegasus," means the poet is engaged in writing.

Summary:
So, you, the main character, want to be a great poet!

You are given a very important decision in regards to it, therefore choose wisely!

Here are some screenshots:



There are three endings, please tell me what you think of them too!

Credits:
All images are from BassNovel.com:

Fat nerd, nice girl, teacher by rpshop, Boy with book by 茶泡飯將, Mother by 貓瞳, Crazy by mobetac17249, Manager/cashier/doctor by papawsnancy

Backgrounds by catdodo, Pegasus by Tatiana

The other images are from 123rf.com

Music: Incompetech.com, Sound: SoundBible.com

Based on Pegasus from the Horror Stories Collection "The Creatures"
* * * * * * * * * *
Co-writer: ElenaKiara from VNMysteries has some ideas to convert this story into a full-size VN, with more actions, events and adventures; and this version would be just a start.

This is why we need as much feedback as possible, and any additional ideas/suggestions are also welcome!

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Here are the download links (updated)

Windows:
Pegasus-win32.zip - 53.5 MB

Mac:
Pegasus-mac.zip - 56.5 MB

Linux:
Pegasus-linux-x86.tar.bz2 - 52.2 MB

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Robinson(Wright1000) helped me as well with the draft.

[HigurashiKira]

Time for my review! *cue lightning and evil laughter*

Story-wise, it was good. But parts of the story weren't connected right. An example would be

when you're talking to the teacher. She mentions Pegasus even though Pegasus is never brought up by the MC at all yet he's still hurt by that.

There's also a glitch. When I go into the save menu and come back the text dosen't display at all and gets stuck.

General Rating
Story: 7.5/10
Music: 8/10
Art: 6/10
Overall: 7/10

For your first game, it's pretty good. Though it could use a bit of polishing.

[lilyalex]

Ooops. I thought if MC writes poetry s(he) knows what is the meaning of Pegasus

I'll check the menu for sure

Thank you very much for the comments!