[Kinetic Novel] Soul & Heart

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Lumen_Astrum
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Completed: Soul and Heart, Twin Faces
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[Kinetic Novel] Soul & Heart

#1 Post by Lumen_Astrum » Fri Nov 25, 2011 11:15 am

Image
"Feelings are, as they say, forever."

It was once the land of dreams, feelings and happiness.
The nation filled with smiles and joy.
Where each person learns how to dream, and strive for it.
Where tears were an expression of a freedom to express a sorrow long kept in the heart.
Where memories are treasures greater than any more jewel.

Unfortunately, that was a long time ago.

Now, the effects of war and tears in the nation had brought on a world without feelings and memories.
No one knows what feelings are, except for very few people.
No one dared to be sad, to be happy.
No one knows how to dream or reminisce a memory.

Dreams, memories, tears... these things are considered a sin.
A sin which only few people know about and can do freely.

Happiness is temporary.
Dreams will reach nothing.
Tears are a sign of weakness.
Feelings caused despair and hurt.

It was the feeling of singing a one-note song.
And one girl breaks the silence.



Once, when the chance showed up, Sirius risked everything to get once into the records room to get one piece of data she wanted, which is the identity of her parents. This ruined her life, as she was caught due to "stealing" of information and dealing physical injuries. She regretted everything she did in that day. But one year after her stay in prison, she had to be transferred to a different section of the prison area.

In there, she met Cetus, a "woman" who got her gender removed, and Daena Blackstar, a young appointed general who started guarding their cells as part of her training on "discipline". Little did she know they will be part on the next turn of events that will change her life...

As time passes by, her life gets worse as memories of long ago started coming to her, as if a lone spirit awaking from a long sleep. With the medium of dreams she was able to look at other people's hearts at the past... and on her own, which brought on the realization of what is behind her own mysterious past. The stories makes the past more tangling, more confusing... It triggers one event that will break each others' trust to everyone.


Characters

Image
Sirius
A teenager, whom has been convicted of "information theft", and her genetic stature was disrupted, resulting on odd medical conditions, changing eye color and a side of her hair in a different color (her hair is white really). She has been convicted for a year until she has to transfer cells. She usually breaks the prison rules like laughing and cursing. Her body is able to wean herself off the chemical that erases memories, and as a result, her mind reminisces moments of other people from years ago through dreams.

Image
Cetus
A fellow convict Sirius met during her transfer of cells. She has been convicted of "illegal marriage", and thus almost everything of her femininity is removed, while her husband was killed by lethal injection. She is a bit harsh, and like Sirius, she violates the prison rules a lot. She almost never gives up. She was brought down to position by personal matters, until it came to the point that she does crimes herself. She was never caught, until she got married and the illegal marriage pact was broken when her husband was executed.

Image
Daena
A general one rank lower than the head general (you can call him a 5-star general), which is her father. She was the replacement for the previous general who was killed by a highly guarded convict. Daena is kinder than the other generals, due to the fact she was trained to be a general by her mother, not her father. She is somewhat different from the other generals in terms of attitude, but still, she doesn't seem to trust Sirius and Cetus when she first met them...

Screenshots
http://fc02.deviantart.net/fs70/f/2011/ ... 4c5zor.png
http://i1234.photobucket.com/albums/ff4 ... ot0001.png
http://i1234.photobucket.com/albums/ff4 ... ot0002.png
http://i1234.photobucket.com/albums/ff4 ... ot0015.png

Credits
Preliminary Editor, Proofreader, Co-writer : night_serenade
Editors: Shadow, RemnantDream, Wright1000
Music : SENTIVE, Kevin Macloed, maestrorage (Newgrounds), Freeplaymusic, Rengoku Teien
Sound Effects : Youtube, freeSFX, SoundBible
CG Help : Nebi, Tag-
Background Artist : Mugenjohncel
Beta-testers : Tag-, shine, Kirroha, netravelr, Kaku-chan, azureXtwilight

Download
Windows Download | Windows Mirror Download (4shared)
Mac Download
Linux Coming Soon!

It might not be as awesome as you expected it, but I still hope you at least enjoyed it. XD
Last edited by Lumen_Astrum on Tue Feb 28, 2012 7:55 am, edited 5 times in total.

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Veniae
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Re: [Kinetic Novel] Soul & Heart

#2 Post by Veniae » Fri Nov 25, 2011 11:26 am

Congrats on your release! I'm going to play it ASAP!

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therealrose
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Re: [Kinetic Novel] Soul & Heart

#3 Post by therealrose » Fri Nov 25, 2011 11:54 am

You finally finshed the game! I'm downloading it right now!

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Re: [Kinetic Novel] Soul & Heart

#4 Post by Rewritten Ennui » Fri Nov 25, 2011 1:48 pm

Why am I just seeing this now? I love how bleak this world sounds :twisted: Going to download this and I'll get back to you once I finish.
I've swapped accounts to CheeryMoya, so this account is no longer in use. Refer to the new account if you want to contact me.

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teacup
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Re: [Kinetic Novel] Soul & Heart

#5 Post by teacup » Fri Nov 25, 2011 2:57 pm

Ooh, nice work on finishing!
I'm downloading this right now. ^-^
Image

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Re: [Kinetic Novel] Soul & Heart

#6 Post by DaFool » Fri Nov 25, 2011 4:36 pm

This is pretty impressive. I'm far from finished reading, but what was your main inspiration?

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Re: [Kinetic Novel] Soul & Heart

#7 Post by KimiYoriBaka » Fri Nov 25, 2011 5:08 pm

^lol, just finished reading the part in the bonus section where it says this

btw, it was a nice guess, but I actually clicked on the creator notes button cause I like seeing all the content that gets put in each vn I read.

found an error. your gallery is set to go back to the main menu, but in the wrong context, so if the user clicks any of the buttons, they get a jump out exception. since your rpy files are still there, I went ahead and the problematic line. It's in art.rpy, at the last line. main_menu_screen needs to be replaced with either renpy.full_restart() (if you wanted it to go back to the main menu), or bonusmenu.

as for the story itself, I rather liked it. My only real complaint is that it felt like the whole thing was just the first chapter or so of what should have been a full novel. You didn't resolve much of the conflict. It especially bugged me that
calypso spouts off lines like a final boss then never gets a chance to be a final boss.
the artwork is really nice, especially the choice of colors. I wasn't sure what age everyone was supposed to be, but I think that somewhat helped the story's ambiguity. A suggestion, though: until you get better at drawing people of different adult ages, try to avoid mentioning how old your characters are compared to each other. That line threw me off a bit... Either that, or mention it during the character's first appearance so the reader knows.

One last thing, I'm curious.
Did you name the bunny ursa as a joke, or because you didn't know what that means?

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Lumen_Astrum
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Re: [Kinetic Novel] Soul & Heart

#8 Post by Lumen_Astrum » Fri Nov 25, 2011 6:00 pm

Some of the art was outdated, did it last March. I only did some retouches.

And Calypso's intended to be like that, it's some sort of a "mystery effect" or something. It's there to make you wonder XD But I think I haven't written that well, huh?
And actually, I'm deciding to make a sequel according to what people think of it.

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Re: [Kinetic Novel] Soul & Heart

#9 Post by RemnantDream » Fri Nov 25, 2011 6:20 pm

Yayay! I finally get to see your lovely sprites with the dialouge!

I'll have to download it later. But congrats on releasing it :D

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Re: [Kinetic Novel] Soul & Heart

#10 Post by Tag- » Fri Nov 25, 2011 7:17 pm

8D gkflagjlagfkgEEEEEEE-
.....Ahem



Oh man, massive, massive congratulations for finishing this project, Lumen~ You did good :D
I'll play through it a bit later again and give my thoughts ufufufu~ =v=
PM me if needed

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Re: [Kinetic Novel] Soul & Heart

#11 Post by 15385bic » Sat Nov 26, 2011 4:20 am

congrats on finishing!
i'll play after i finish my stupid reports Q.q

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Re: [Kinetic Novel] Soul & Heart

#12 Post by JustAnotherMe » Sat Nov 26, 2011 7:34 am

congratzzz, Lumen!!!!! >w< so giddy giddy!!!
I'll play it after I get a time!! XDDD
You are bigger than what you think but smaller than you can imagine.
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Re: [Kinetic Novel] Soul & Heart

#13 Post by DaFool » Sat Nov 26, 2011 9:17 am

Yeah, I saw that section after unlocking the Bonus, lol duh.
I was also class president at some point in my school career. I just hated how everybody would dump everything just because you're responsible.

Anyways... the ending was a bit weak, but it assumes that every General knew what a farce the whole system was... that's why they were able to eventually agree on the promotions.

The reality is... well, take a look at North Korea. There's a darker network of chains at work here.

Sgt. Calypso is an interesting character. I would like to know more about her motivations rather than just being the General's 'favorite'.

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Re: [Kinetic Novel] Soul & Heart

#14 Post by Stargirl18 » Sat Nov 26, 2011 9:27 am

Hello Lumen_Astrum. Its it some choices in it? And has it some ending in it? Or is jus normal Kinetic Novel?

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Re: [Kinetic Novel] Soul & Heart

#15 Post by KuroSushi » Sat Nov 26, 2011 9:59 am

I'm not used to kinetic novels but this one seems to be really good! I've played just like the first five minutes (well no time for more play :( ) I loved the intro and the music, fits perfectly!

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