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PostPosted: Sun Mar 31, 2013 10:09 pm 
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Location: New Brunswick, Canada
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I made it under the wire! This is a quick project that took way too long. :)

This is the story of one fateful day in the life of Bess, the innkeeper's daughter. She has three men in her life: the romantic Highwayman, the rough-and-ready captain, and the sweet Ostler. Who is she working with? The choice is yours.

This is a very short VN. 3500 words. There are 7 endings. It has the potential to be longer and I will certainly expand it if there is interest (Or if someone volunteers to write it!)

WARNING!
This is a tragedy! There are NO happy endings. None. Nada.

BASED ON: http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/the-highwayman/


Things I would like to do to finish it:
- Add more Achievements
- Add epilogue for "perfect" endings
- Add music
- Add CGs

Susan

http://susanthecat.com/games/Highwayman-1.0-win.zip
http://susanthecat.com/games/Highwayman-1.0-mac.zip
http://susanthecat.com/games/Highwayman ... ux.tar.bz2

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PostPosted: Mon Apr 01, 2013 8:45 am 
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Joined: Tue Nov 11, 2003 8:51 am
Posts: 3274
Location: Germany
Completed: Metropolitan Blues, The Loyal Kinsman, Daemonophilia, The Dreaming, The Thirteenth Year, Adrift, Bionic Heart 2, Secrets of the Wolf, The Photographer
Projects: The Pilgrim's Path, Elspeth's Garden, Secret Adventure Game!
Organization: Tall Tales Productions
Twitter: @TallTalesVN
Hm. Played it, and while I found the possible outcomes interesting, somehow the paths to them didn't really seem to connect with me. Maybe this story ought to begin much earlier than it currently does, so that the different characters can be introduced better? It's really difficult to feel the drama and tragedy when the people this tragedy revolves around aren't there long enough to grow on you.

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Scriptwriter and director of The Dreaming

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"Adrift - Like Ever17, but without the Deus Ex Machina" - HigurashiKira



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PostPosted: Mon Apr 01, 2013 10:26 am 
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Location: New Brunswick, Canada
Thanks playing and lots of thanks for the feedback. I agree with you :)

I kept procrastinating about finishing the game and didn't fill out the story as much as I wanted. My plan is to have the day spent reminiscing about the various characters to expand the back story a bit.

That said, I would appreciate if any writers wanted to help me flesh out the story. :)

Susan

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PostPosted: Mon Apr 01, 2013 11:10 pm 
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Completed: May-chan, The Country with no People, Him&Me
I've just played through one of the routes ( or well the 'normal' poem ending to the Highwayman at least) and its brought back a lot of memories. I remember when I was in middle school reading this poem for the first time and being enthralled by it. It's very sad of course, but something about it has always held my fascination, and tragedy of it all makes that the more so. Thank you for making this!

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PostPosted: Tue Apr 02, 2013 7:41 am 
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Thank you for playing!

I had to memorize this poem in middle school. I was really hard not to just use the words as written in the poem. I tired my best to hint at them, but not use them directly.

Susan

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PostPosted: Tue Apr 02, 2013 11:59 pm 
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Joined: Mon Aug 29, 2011 5:31 pm
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Projects: That's the Way the Cookie Crumbles, Ibuki Magica
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Four endings so far. It's not bad, but I'm not sure why you tried to avoid using the words as written?

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PostPosted: Tue Apr 09, 2013 6:11 pm 
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Aw, I remember reading this poem back in 7th grade lol.
It was a really interesting poem.

I'll be sure to try this out sometime!

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PostPosted: Tue Apr 09, 2013 7:49 pm 
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Joined: Mon Feb 25, 2013 6:33 pm
Posts: 313
Location: New York
Completed: demo for Vignettes
Projects: Vignettes, A Turbulent Age
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Yes, that certainly was short... which is not surprising for a NaNo!

I liked the intrigue when taking certain choices. (I'm a sucker for that sort of thing.) The number of characters introduced in such a short period of time was a bit confusing at first, but I knew who everybody was after a couple playthroughs. There was not much characterization. Not much came through in the words or actions (with the exception of the bad guy); more came through in the visuals and the context (ie. I can imagine what type of person the highwayman is supposed to be because he is a highwayman). Certainly, it's tough in something so short, but I felt like the words could have done a little more. I loved the achievements -- it made it easy to understand how the endings all worked, and I like understanding how the endings all work. ;)

Personally, I don't think it's necessary to try too hard to hint at or directly reference the poem. For me, I guessed from the title alone... and then of course the setting, characters, and eventually events confirmed it. I'm in favor of using your own words!

I also think during the endings (I'm not sure this is spoiler-y but I'll put it in the tags anyway),
it felt a little contrived when Bess said things like, "I have no idea why the poem ended up like that." It seemed a little too direct, and ignores the fact that distortion is common in stories that get retold. I think it would be better to focus her dialogue on the idea, "But I know the REAL story..." And maybe a little more personal/bitter comments rather than simply what happened.


I hope that this is helpful if you do decide to expand it =)

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PostPosted: Wed Apr 10, 2013 9:33 am 
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Location: New Brunswick, Canada
Thank you for playing my game!

I agree that the endings need to be smoothed out. Thank you for the point about Bess it is helpful, I will change that if I expand it. Right now I still in the period when I hate everything I've just written. I'm taking a break then I'll revisit it.

One of the things I wanted to do was expand the story in the modern world as epilogues for getting a "perfect" play-through to give a happier spin to the story. But then I second guess myself and say "The story is a tragedy. Leave it that way"

RE using the direct lines from the poem. I have had this poem memorized for 25 years. If I start with one line, I would get carried away and just keep writing out the poem. One of the themes of the story is that stories get mutated. I had a fun time trying to create stories that would end up with the same retelling of the story, but each story would have a different feel.

Susan

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PostPosted: Sun Jun 23, 2013 6:34 am 
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Projects: Stained with Magic
I've had a visual novel binge today, but this looks rather interesting! I'll certainly give it a go soon! You did base this off one of my all-time favorite poems after all! :3 I can't wait to try it out~

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PostPosted: Sun Jun 23, 2013 2:27 pm 
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Thanks for giving it a chance. I hope you'll enjoy it.

Susan

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— Andrew Hunt and David Thomas


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