Melos [YuriJam]

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Skarn
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Melos [YuriJam]

#1 Post by Skarn » Sat Oct 31, 2015 8:07 pm

Image
Picture Archaic Greece.

A strange and ambivalent time and land. Most of the country is uncivilized, a chain of city-states, yet the isles on the other side of the sea have been colonized. Socrate's great-great-grandfather is not born yet, but art is flourishing and the Odyssey a scholar classic. Many conceptions about Ancient Greece are already true, but much more are not, for the best and the worst.

Melos is a short story (around 11,000 words for 6 endings) about the relationship between two young women in this blooming world, with poetry, paintings and other art forms the ancient Greeks were fond of.

Screenshots:
Image
Image
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Credits:
  • Art by Katta
  • GUI (assets and related code) by Anne
  • Text by myself
  • For all other credits, please refer to the credits file.
PS: I plan to push the code on Github soon as I see no reason to hide and it may interest some (and will probably make some cry... damn ShowingSwitch)
EDIT: Done. The source can now be found there: https://github.com/ceithir/melos
Last edited by Skarn on Sat Nov 07, 2015 5:41 pm, edited 2 times in total.

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Re: Melos [YuriJam]

#2 Post by Godline » Mon Nov 02, 2015 2:53 am

Beautiful game. I think Katta's art just keeps getting better and better. And lovely GUI from Anne.

The writing was sweet and as realistic as you can be for a GxG game set in this era.
I really enjoyed
how there were no truly romantic good ends
. That set it apart for me from everything else we're going to be seeing for yuri jam.

And you guys finished right on time - so that's awesome too!

I recommend this game for everyone, even people that don't generally like yuri. You'd be surprised how much you like it. :)

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Re: Melos [YuriJam]

#3 Post by kaan » Mon Nov 02, 2015 2:05 pm

Great work. I'm a greek myself and I can tell you that I believe you've got the atmosphere right! :)

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Re: Melos [YuriJam]

#4 Post by LeonDaydreamer » Mon Nov 02, 2015 7:04 pm

The art and overall atmosphere is really nice. :)

The writing is good and characters well thought out, but I noticed quite a few spelling mistakes (don't mean to sound fussy, just pointing it out).
I feel bad for Ambrosia, I can't help rooting for her...
... this deserves a sequel!
ImageImageImageImage

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Skarn
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Re: Melos [YuriJam]

#5 Post by Skarn » Tue Nov 03, 2015 3:42 am

LeonDaydreamer wrote:but I noticed quite a few spelling mistakes (don't mean to sound fussy, just pointing it out).
Don't be shy, and do not hesitate to list those you've seen. One of the reasons I started this project was to force myself to write quite a bunch in English, to improve my mastery of this language, so I welcome any remark on the spelling, style, syntax, grammar... with open arms.

I know there are numerous errors (I already received a list with a first batch to fix), because we may have rushed things to be on time for the (initial) deadline. But I intend to correct as many as I can in the end.

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Re: Melos [YuriJam]

#6 Post by philip » Fri Nov 06, 2015 10:05 pm

@Skarn-

A very nice story with very attractive artwork. Have only played through a time or two; will have to revisit to get the remaining endings. (Hope that there is a happy one in there somewhere).

philip
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Re: Melos [YuriJam]

#7 Post by ebi-hime » Sat Nov 07, 2015 7:11 am

Using paintings as BGs was such a good idea, the whole game looks so pretty!
This was made so nicely - the art, the bgs, the music, the writing style, it all compliments each other so well.
Everything seemed to fit in with the theme, and I like how polished the GUI was.

I really liked the textbox, it's big enough to fit in a lot of text, which suits the elaborate and more novel-like prose, but it's still suitably VN-y.
However, I thought the navigation links in the preferences menu were a bit too pale, and they don't stand out enough? It was also a bit strange, since the navigation is at the bottom on the main menu, but then at the top on the preferences screen - it might make the VN feel more... cohesive... if the navigation links are in roughly the same place in each screen. But it's nothing major.

The writing is so nice and detailed! It really fits the classical Greek theme (opening with a Sappho poem was nice - I don't know much about Sappho but I know a little bit). There are some spelling errors (not really any tense problems, mostly minor things, like some words haven't been turned into plurals properly, etc), but I didn't make a note of it when I went through so I can't tell you what they are haha... I'm so helpful.
But the spelling errors didn't detract from the story, I still enjoyed it a lot.

And, since I love classical-ish writing, coupled with literary references and
one-sided romance that can never amount to anything, this is the perfect story for me haha. It's basically everything I like smushed together into one VN. I searched trying to find a happy ending for Ambrosia, but I'm kind of glad there isn't one, since the sadness is so delicious... And opens itself up to some really nice descriptive language haha XD;
I have a lot of commercial VNs available on Steam here if you wanna check! u///u
With a yandere dating sim, a moemoe moege about cute grills and food, a sad GxG story, a sad GxB story, there should be something for everyone <3

/ shameless plugging

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Skarn
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Re: Melos [YuriJam]

#8 Post by Skarn » Wed Nov 11, 2015 6:51 pm

The GUI, in good and bad (well, mostly in good – it was quite a pleasant surprise for me when I tried it for the first time) is entirely the work of Anne (Katta's sister). Generally speaking, my contribution to this project's art was mostly to add a good deal of extra confusion and speak not helpful at all remarks. I can only thank Katta and Anne again for having somehow managed to do a really good job despite my impenetrable directives.

One of my first ideas about this project was to have Sappho as an actual character in the story, but I discarded this concept quickly as she was too complex and mysterious for such a short work.

I feel a little like a fraud with so many people praising the writing. The distinctive ancient style, with a lot of old-fashioned words, is, in part, a consequence of French being my native tongue, and Old English having a lot of French words into it. So, sometimes, I use words which are still commonly used in today French in my texts without realizing how much they are passé in modern English.

I admittedly played with this known weakness here... But some particularly bizarre words are probably still there by accident.

Also, about the endings:
I thought more than a few times about adding a "not so bad" ending... Or at least some sort of distant epilogue in the future, with Antiope happy with her (new) love (not Antiope), as a "life goes on" optimistic message. But this didn't make its way to the final product. Because reasons.

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Re: Melos [YuriJam]

#9 Post by DrSchizo » Thu Nov 19, 2015 9:16 pm

You can now play online to Melos on Sandbox Adventure.

The game is in full HTML5 so there is no need to download or install anything.
You can register if you want to save your game but you don't have to register to play.

While in game, hit F1 to view the shortcuts list.

You can find more information about Sandbox Adventure Engine on this thread.

I hope you will like it. Don't hesitate to report bugs if you find any.

Have fun! ;)

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