One Million Kisses

[mikey]

Backgrounds are bad. Colors are an eyesore.

Well, I wanted at one point to shade them with one color to make them smaller in size, but it was really impossible to see what it is, then. I wouldn't be able to use grayscales with that level of flatness. With Kaori I could do that, since the contours were buildings, but not here.

Sprites are bad. No blending of colors, too flat. Also having the characters hide their hands behind their backs is like the oldest trick in the book, but eventually you kind of have to show hands.

Well, I *did* show bodies, my worst case scenario was actually just faces next to the textbox - they would be smaller and would mean even less drawing skill would be needed, at least in theory. But hands are one level too much for me. As for flat colors, this was actually the goal, I tried to reduce the color depth as much as I could, plus I used "dither", to achieve that effect.

No music. Music is very important in a VN, and this had no music. Could have at least thrown something together in garageband, at least.

As I said before, I didn't plan on using music. I like either original, or none (in most games I play without music and with my music in the background) - and I don't like ready-made. So I knew relatively right away that I won't use the music.

Even if you do it yourself, there should be a higher standard of quality. Maybe even moreso as doing it yourself, you have absolute control. If you're going to try and justify it by saying "it was a rush job," that is a poor excuse.

You should have taken more time.

To be honest, I'm really proud of it - it's a game that I did/finished in one day and this is how I'll remember it. I don't (didn't) want to get into "standards of quality" considerations, this really isn't that kind of game. I wouldn't spend more time on it, that would go against its nature.

This said, I can completely understand that this will not be appealing to many people, in fact I was pleasantly surprised and happy for those who liked it. Still, thank you for sharing the thoughts.

[A22 is awesome]

>Well, I wanted at one point to shade them with one color to make them smaller in size, but it was really impossible to see what it is, then. I wouldn't be able to use grayscales with that level of flatness. With Kaori I could do that, since the contours were buildings, but not here.

What? You could have just used some cheap filters and gotten a better effect than the eye gouging color clash you ended up with. Did you even look at how bad the colors mesh? They are far too bright, and do not blend at all. There is also no depth anyway, so what you get is a terrible MS Paint quality background that is all fuzzy and indistinct anyway, while also being painful to look at because of the terrible color choice. Or lack thereof.

>Well, I *did* show bodies, my worst case scenario was actually just faces next to the textbox - they would be smaller and would mean even less drawing skill would be needed, at least in theory. But hands are one level too much for me. As for flat colors, this was actually the goal, I tried to reduce the color depth as much as I could, plus I used "dither", to achieve that effect.

If you're going to use flat colors, you need to put thought into what the colors are. Nevertheless, intentionally going for this effect is questionable... why would you even do it? It makes no sense. Also "well at least I drew bodies" is no excuse.

>As I said before, I didn't plan on using music. I like either original, or none (in most games I play without music and with my music in the background) - and I don't like ready-made. So I knew relatively right away that I won't use the music.

OK. You realize this means the game has no ambiance at all outside of text, right? Ambiance is hard through art and requires mass setup to do through writing, and you did neither of those, so all you would have(and the most efficient way) would be music. And you had no music. Hell, you could have put in ambient noise. Not even music, but sounds, but there was nothing.

>To be honest, I'm really proud of it - it's a game that I did/finished in one day and this is how I'll remember it. I don't (didn't) want to get into "standards of quality" considerations, this really isn't that kind of game. I wouldn't spend more time on it, that would go against its nature.

"I made the game really fast" does not excuse the fact that you posted the game up here, to show it off, and when you are going to do that, aren't you doing it expecting it to be judged? If that's the case, bring your A game.

>This said, I can completely understand that this will not be appealing to many people, in fact I was pleasantly surprised and happy for those who liked it. Still, thank you for sharing the thoughts.

Do you not realize you are in the middle of a circlejerk?

[mikey]

Well, I just wanted to say that I accept all the points you brought up and cannot tell you any counter-arguments or explanations other than those before, as far as the game is concerned.

[herenvardo]

Honestly, I disagree with almost everything said by A22: everything he pointed out as a fault I felt as a virtue of the game. The main point of the game, IMO, was not the fact it was made on one day, but its purity, excellently expressed through simplicity. Music? Elaborate graphics? That wouldn't have helped the game, they would have just been a distraction from the story.
About music, I'd like to comment something that I have noticed after replaying the story a couple times. I'm putting it into Sonata Arctica's words because I can't think of any better wording:

It truly makes the most beautiful music
Everything it has to give
It's everywhere hiding the listener
Without it I could not live
...Silence

So, although maybe unadvertedly, mikey managed to use a music that matches the story quite well: silence. Of course, you'd need to be able to listen to the silence (rather than simply perceive it) to realize that. Maybe a rain noise on the background could have worked well, but since I live in Ireland I see no difference between that and absolute silence

If you want an exciting game experience with awesome graphics and a full orchestra on the background, then try out WoW or something like that. But if you simply wished to enjoy a simple story in its purest form, then you wouldn't have posted that criticism, becaust that's what this game is; and I'd bet that's what mikey intended it to be.

Just my opinion.

[Turn A 22]

>Honestly, I disagree with almost everything said by A22: everything he pointed out as a fault I felt as a virtue of the game.

lawl OK, bad sprites, no music, eyesore colors are all virtues.

>The main point of the game, IMO, was not the fact it was made on one day, but its purity, excellently expressed through simplicity. Music? Elaborate graphics? That wouldn't have helped the game,

WHAT

>they would have just been a distraction from the story.

WHAT

Please, tell me how good art and music would detract from the story. You realize this is a visual novel, right? Art and music are an integral part of the immersion. If anything, a lack of music and bad art are the distraction, since instead of getting the full potential of the experience I am put off by the garish backgrounds and sprites, and wondering where the hell the music is.

>About music, I'd like to comment something that I have noticed after replaying the story a couple times. I'm putting it into Sonata Arctica's words because I can't think of any better wording:
>So, although maybe unadvertedly, mikey managed to use a music that matches the story quite well: silence. Of course, you'd need to be able to listen to the silence (rather than simply perceive it) to realize that. Maybe a rain noise on the background could have worked well, but since I live in Ireland I see no difference between that and absolute silence

First, it's "inadvertently." Second, silence only works as ambiance in certain situations, at certain times. This game is not one of those times. 80% of it takes place in the rain. Yet there is no rain sound effect. No animals to symbolize walking through a forest. Nothing. Nothing at all. That is not good.

>If you want an exciting game experience with awesome graphics and a full orchestra on the background, then try out WoW or something like that. But if you simply wished to enjoy a simple story in its purest form, then you wouldn't have posted that criticism, becaust that's what this game is; and I'd bet that's what mikey intended it to be.

Mikey is not dead, stop trying to interpret his game for him.

On top of my earlier criticisms I would like to add that the writing had mondo exposition hammer in the beginning with a creation story, but then everything else is described way too briskly. One line of walking through a forest. Maybe two. Also, obvious choices. They are "chase the boy you like" or "GTFO." Very obvious. Too obvious.

The background still shows rain despite it saying in the text the rain has stopped.

"The nature?" Walking through "the nature?" It's grammatically incorrect. Seriously.

The forced fullscreen startup kind of sucks, too, but that is not as big as flaw as the other stuff.

[Jake]

Does throwing your weight around unsubtly in such a hugbox community make you feel big, or are you just desperate to get some entertainment from somewhere?

Seriously, maybe this forum is just a big circlejerk, maybe Mikey is showing his two-chord guitar song to his twelve-year-old mates in his parents' garage: what does it matter? It just makes you that prick who kicks over kids' sandcastles, nothing more.

Nobody here is under any illusions that we're about to be winning literature prizes or anything; if you don't like what you see here, why do you keep reading the forum? If you genuinely wanted to help, you'd be a bit more civil, since you've seen before that this community reacts as badly as anyone else to aggression.

[herenvardo]

Please, tell me how good art and music would detract from the story.

Since this is the only point you made in a civic language and tone, it's the only one I'm going to bother answering:
The more complex and ellaborate is the art (as well as music, which is actually also "art"), the more attention it draws. The more attention taken by these elements means to less attention left to the text. Text in this story carries a heavy and deep meaning which can only be fully perceived and enjoyed with a higher than usual attention to it. I'm really sorry for you if you were unable to get it.

instead of getting the full potential of the experience I am put off by the garish backgrounds and sprites, and wondering where the hell the music is

That's your fault, not the game's: if you don't like the images, or if you have seen them for long enough, don't keep looking at them and look at the text. And why wonder where the music is when this is so obvious? It's nowhere: there is no music ¬¬'

BTW, for what art is concerned, good and bad is often a really subjective call: you might like or dislike it, and each person may get a different impression; but saying that a form of art is good or bad, beyond technical quality, is like saying that the number "4" is beautiful or that the letter "B" is ugly. And, personally, I got so immersed on the text when playing this game that the art's technicall quality became irrelevant. It served it's purpose, and served it well, so it was good enough.


I'm wondering: what did you expect from this game?
I suggest you to replay it once you have learned how to listen to the silence, how to walk through the nature, and how to feel a kiss from the rain. Then you'll most probably enjoy it as much as I did; and I really wish you that joy .

[N0UGHTS]

...You didn't like the BGs? I personally thought the colors were quite nice... It helped with that storybook-like atmosphere for me. Or at least, I interpreted the game to be storybook-like. And this is exactly why I agree with herenvardo that music and elaborate graphics would've been a distraction; this game really exists just to tell a simple story that mikey felt like telling, nothing else.

Or at least he won't say.

[Scout]

The tragic part is that A22 has made some legitimately good points, that will now be summarily ignored because they were wrapped heavily in venom. Had they actually been civily brought up, maybe they might've been acknowledged, and helped Mikey grow as an artist; but instead the whole thing is so hostile that nobody in their right mind could read any of his posts without immediately jumping to the defensive.

It's probably also succeeding in disuading anyone from actually posting any real critique in fear of coming across as supporting him, and I think that's awfully sad. Why does pointing out ways in which someone could improve on their work have to turn into an endless tirade of jackassery? I mean, come on, really?

[Wintermoon]

I loved the backgrounds. The writing wasn't bad, but somewhat generic. The character sprites served a structural purpose, I guess, but I didn't really care for them. The backgrounds, on the other hand, carried the story.

I'm somewhat ambivalent on the lack of music. It works, but it also invites the reader to listen to their own music, which is likely to ruin the mood of the story. Some really subtle ambient background sounds might have worked to emphasize that the lack of music is a deliberate choice and not just laziness. (And if the lack of music wasn't a deliberate choice, then it should have been.)

Also, "the nature" isn't grammatical English.

[A22 is awesome]

Jake: So you're admitting this place sux? Nice?
Why don't you go read every post before mine in this thread. It's all "zomg mikey this game is awesome! everything about it is awesome!" Try to understand that that is far less helpful than anything that I do, which is provide real criticism. Actual criticism. But hey I could just go "yeah it's a great game 10/10" like everyone else.

herenvardo: OK... so the 6 minute VN, which had like a third of the text in a single playthrough taken up by exposition, was too deep for me to understand? It really needs nothing else? No music, and any art will do? Then why am I even playing a VN? Why is this even a VN, then, if it is going to skimp(and even totally leave out) two huge elements of what constitutes a visual novel?

Scout: Why is it that LSF can't seem to criticize any games, regardless of quality? I believe mikey commented on it once: this forum would rather have something done than have it done well. That way of thinking doesn't lead to improvement very often.

You guys can talk about how this VN exists to tell a story. That's all well and good. But it should, you know, tell the story well. "The nature" is a pretty big goof, and it is used redundantly, several times in a row. No one pointed this out until I did. And still, most don't seem to care, despite the fact that it sticks out like a sore thumb to anyone who took 8th grade English.

The art is lacking. There is no point to a story with art if your art is going to turn off the reader from reading it. Where is your story then?

And the lack of music? Music ia huge part of the experience. To disregard music because the VN "doesn't need it" has got to be one of the dumbest things I have ever heard. That is like saying human beings don't need feet because they would still be able to move by crawling around. Sure, you can have a VN without music... but why?

ITT you guys pull your knee-jerk "oh shit criticism = trollan, let's be hypocritically snarky and hostile" BS again... missing the fact that the game is actually flawed. Refusing to acknowledge that the game is flawed. Ignoring how I am the first person to point out that it is flawed.

[PyTom]

I'm going to ask people move responses to this thread unless they're about One Million Kisses specifically.

[KomiTsuku]

The good thing about controversy is that it makes me clear time in my busy schedule. I might be almost dead at tomorrow's meeting from staying up, but I finally got around to reading it. ^.^;

My biggest complaint has nothing to do with the art, lack of music, or typos. What really bugged me was no rollback or ability to move the game around on my screen. I know that's because of how it was done, but when I accidentally clicked twice, I skipped over one of the seasons. Rain, to be exact. I was a bit lost for part of the story, until I restarted.

Because this seems to be an issue, I'm going to toss out my opinion regarding art. I never, ever, ever have my speakers on my laptop turned on because it had a tendency to say random things because it picks up on radio waves. Very weird, very pesky. I know music plays a big part in setting mood (I use it to help establish the mood I can't with my cruddy art), but it is only one of the three major pieces of the VN tri-force.

Art... eh. I wasn't really all that impressed. The BG art reminded me of an odd mix of traditionalist and MS paint. I think it worked well. Sprites... >.> <.< Rain scared me. Something just felt wrong with her image. Reminded me of crazy cat lady. XD

Your writing is what made this enjoyable. While there were some grammar/spelling errors, they didn't disrupt the flow too badly. Honestly, I like mythological stories and exposition isn't painful to me.

Closing thoughts:

It felt kinda pointless to give options. They either lead to the same end or they go to the one that everyone already is aiming for.

I liked it as a short story, but it did lack in a few areas, as has been mentioned several times over.

Last thought: Hehehe... The Visual Novel Tri-force... I mean... 3.5/5

Edit: Finally placed why A22 sounded familiar! I knew I recognized your style of writing! Or maybe it was the tone...

[mikey]

Thanks for the replies! I'm going to skip the "meta"-discussions if that's fine, thanks to PyTom for providing that separate thread.

The forced fullscreen startup kind of sucks, too, but that is not as big as flaw as the other stuff.

The only way I know how to make it windowed under the given environment is with a separate executable, so I let it be.

Also, obvious choices.

Indeed, they aren't really there to lead to alternate scenarios, they have a different role - flavor, illusion, I don't really know. I intuitively put them there, as dead ends that were quite obvious, it felt like a fitting thing to do.

I suggest you to replay it once you have learned how to listen to the silence, how to walk through the nature, and how to feel a kiss from the rain. Then you'll most probably enjoy it as much as I did; and I really wish you that joy.

I'm glad you enjoyed it, that was the simple goal.

And this is exactly why I agree with herenvardo that music and elaborate graphics would've been a distraction; this game really exists just to tell a simple story that mikey felt like telling, nothing else.

Or at least he won't say

No, there was really nothing else ^_^.

The writing wasn't bad, but somewhat generic.

I wanted it to be like a story that anyone could be telling, so generic writing is IMO quite a fitting way to describe it - though I hope it did have at least a small bit of uniqueness.

I'm somewhat ambivalent on the lack of music. It works, but it also invites the reader to listen to their own music, which is likely to ruin the mood of the story. Some really subtle ambient background sounds might have worked to emphasize that the lack of music is a deliberate choice and not just laziness. (And if the lack of music wasn't a deliberate choice, then it should have been.)

Again, I don't want to overphilosophise, to be honest I didn't think that deeply about it. I realized of course, that many people won't like a lack of music, but I've done music-less works before, so it wasn't a new decision to me. I don't have a great way of justifying why, so if this isn't someone's taste, I tend to accept the criticism.

What really bugged me was no rollback or ability to move the game around on my screen. I know that's because of how it was done, but when I accidentally clicked twice, I skipped over one of the seasons. Rain, to be exact. I was a bit lost for part of the story, until I restarted.

This is again because I couldn't implement such a feature technically (mouse rollback). I wrote in the opening post that there are CTRL+Right and CTRL+Left to forward and rewind, which is practically the equivalent of rollback, though it doesn't let you go back before a choice.

And also, sorry about "the nature" and any other mistakes in the text.

[monele]

I'm at work, it's raining outside... and I just tried the game. I'm feeling all fuzzy-good now thanks to this . And it was short enough that I still have half an hour to do some other things on the side. This is just great .
It would definitely work great as a children story since it's sweet and to the point. I have only tried one path so I'm not sure what else there is... but I'm not even sure I want to know! XD The version I got from my choices was just what I wanted to read

(oh and I had the sound turned off, and it didn't bother me at all, wether there was music or not. Actually, with the scenes changing so frequently, I'm not even sure music would have worked right)

As for the BGs and characters, while not high quality, they just fit the whole thing. I suppose HQ version wouldn't *hurt*, per se, but I don't feel they would be necessary. Nothing felt out of place, if you will.


And I made sure to write this *before* looking at the whole A22 controversy.