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The sky was blue. | [Mental Illness | FREE | Short]

Posted: Tue Apr 17, 2018 4:01 pm
by 78909087
Image

This is probably classified as a Kinetic novel. You are supposed to interact, but you'll find it's not what you might think at first.

But what am I saying. I didn't plan this release.
The story was given to me and it had to come out. It's 6am now. I'm living up to my banner.

Forgive the rushed format. This isn't something I wanted to dwell on or perfect.

The game is attached. It should take about 10 minutes or so to play. Maybe more. I read fast.

Edit - I re-uploaded 19/04

Re: The sky was blue. | [Mental Illness | FREE | Short]

Posted: Tue Apr 17, 2018 9:51 pm
by IronForPistons
Wow.

To say that I enjoyed it doesn't capture the experience, in a number of ways. What I can say, though, is that this is an amazingly engaging and interesting game. Wonderful job. This one will have me thinking for a while.

Re: The sky was blue. | [Mental Illness | FREE | Short]

Posted: Wed Apr 18, 2018 3:43 pm
by M.Knight
I gave the game a go and completed it. It was a bit of a mixed experience for me. While the themes were interesting, I wasn't too enthralled by the execution.
The choice system was a good way to express the idea of helplessness, but the fact that they are so numerous, with one of them being very repetitive, hurt the reading rythm because it was very stop-and-go. The events that happen were also completely spoiled by the overly-detailed warning so there wasn't much surprise at the escalation during some of the heavier scenes.
The other thing that made me unable to fully enjoy the experience is how little connection or explanation there is about the character herself. There was no name on her, no appearance, no identity, nothing that could make me feel her struggles as the struggles of a specific person or character. As a result, it is difficult to care about her. Due to how limited the explanations felt to me, I even think I didn't get what the MC's relationship with that other "she" was. Has she become a mom?
Anyway, it was still nice trying out something a bit more experimental than usual!

Re: The sky was blue. | [Mental Illness | FREE | Short]

Posted: Thu Apr 19, 2018 1:01 am
by 78909087
IronForPistons wrote:
Tue Apr 17, 2018 9:51 pm
Wow.

To say that I enjoyed it doesn't capture the experience, in a number of ways. What I can say, though, is that this is an amazingly engaging and interesting game. Wonderful job. This one will have me thinking for a while.
Thank-you for your response
M.Knight wrote:
Wed Apr 18, 2018 3:43 pm
I gave the game a go and completed it. It was a bit of a mixed experience for me. While the themes were interesting, I wasn't too enthralled by the execution.

Anyway, it was still nice trying out something a bit more experimental than usual!
Thank-you for this detailed response. I think this game will resonate best with people who can understand the feeling. The character is kept anonymous because who she is doesn't matter anymore.
The choices presented are all the inner mind. You are her thoughts. The repetition is an attempt to self-soothe.
I completely understand your points, but I also won't apologize for the presentation. This is how it is experienced by the self, and this is how it is presented. I do agree with the improperly fleshed out later "her". I went back and deleted a lot of interactions with her because it interrupted the flow. Though it might seem not to have one. I promise everything here is as it is for a reason. I'm editing the game's splashscreen now.

I also added a few extra lines here and there. Not that noticeable, but it might improve a first experience.

Re: The sky was blue. | [Mental Illness | FREE | Short]

Posted: Tue May 22, 2018 5:34 pm
by Zelan
This was a really touching experience. Thank you for making it.

Re: The sky was blue. | [Mental Illness | FREE | Short]

Posted: Wed May 23, 2018 1:50 pm
by DirkB
Nice atmospheric music.

Maybe instead of letting the reader click for every phrase, just let them appear automatically after one or two(?) seconds.

Re: The sky was blue. | [Mental Illness | FREE | Short]

Posted: Wed May 23, 2018 4:26 pm
by IronForPistons
Personally, I think that having the reader click for every line was a positive. I think it engages the reader more than having the text automatically appear, and adds to the sense of being in the MC's head.

Re: The sky was blue. | [Mental Illness | FREE | Short]

Posted: Thu May 24, 2018 11:13 pm
by Godline
I agree.

This got dark but that was the point. I would hope people struggling with thoughts like this would be able to take something positive away from it.

Re: The sky was blue. | [Mental Illness | FREE | Short]

Posted: Tue May 29, 2018 7:13 am
by 78909087
Zelan wrote:
Tue May 22, 2018 5:34 pm
This was a really touching experience. Thank you for making it.
Thank-you for experiencing it and taking the time to reply :)
DirkB wrote:
Wed May 23, 2018 1:50 pm
Nice atmospheric music.

Maybe instead of letting the reader click for every phrase, just let them appear automatically after one or two(?) seconds.
IronForPistons wrote:
Wed May 23, 2018 4:26 pm
Personally, I think that having the reader click for every line was a positive. I think it engages the reader more than having the text automatically appear, and adds to the sense of being in the MC's head.
As IronForPistons mentioned. This is an interaction designed to make you feel more like you're inside the head of the MC.

Thank-you both for your replies :)
Godline wrote:
Thu May 24, 2018 11:13 pm
I agree.

This got dark but that was the point. I would hope people struggling with thoughts like this would be able to take something positive away from it.
I'm glad you walked away with the meaning I had intended. This is a way to reach out to others while also letting the thoughts themselves out. It's an experience.

Thank-you for your reply :)