My Heart Becomes Ice Cream

[lunasspecto]

I've created a very short kinetic novel (probably about two minutes in length) called "My Heart Becomes Ice Cream". It's a story that begins thus: "I have an apartment in Astoria with huge windows."

Screenshot from "My Heart Becomes Ice Cream".

I've run into some strange problems with this one: Ren'Py keeps hanging up before showing the dialogue window, resulting in awkward pauses. If the reader clicks during one of these pauses, Ren'Py will skip ahead once it finally displays the window. Also, the project was in NVL mode, but I changed it to ADV mode when I noticed that the spacing between lines of dialogue was wildly inconsistent. Also, it seems that I'm unable to take a screenshot using the "s" key. I'm using Ren'Py 6.9.3 and it doesn't pause before displaying the text window in my other projects. Feel free to look at the script if you want to figure this one out.

Here are the download links:

• All-in-one Macintosh/Windows/Linux archive: http://www.mediafire.com/?xomeez5myxm

• Macintosh app: http://www.mediafire.com/?tt23jzfh2z2

• Windows Installer: http://www.mediafire.com/?i0ycxu2jm0i

[lordcloudx]

Frankly, I wouldn't call this a story as there seems to be no actual connections between the different events presented here unless I'm missing something. Maybe the author would like to add some notes to aid in reading this?

Anyway, after reading this, I skimmed through some of the pieces in your fictionpress profile and I realized that all your works have this similar style.

So, my personal evaluation of your works in general, (including this one) is that they are kinda like fragments of a complete story - perspectives of people in different situations with no real beginning or end.

It was a bit disorienting reading this one, but seeing more of your works, I think this nearly unstructured style suits you well. I would like to see what you can do with something more concrete, though. Maybe if you tried piecing together those short story fragments that you keep writing? Of course, it's your choice.

"The Warmth of Our Socks" was a nice read.

[lunasspecto]

Thanks for reading over my stuff - and pointing out another embarrassing error in "The Warmth of Our Socks". I think I typed that one far too quickly (or maybe I was just quite fatigued). In case I didn't make this clear enough, I'll note that most of "My Heart Becomes Ice Cream"

is the fantasy of an adolescent in a psychiatric hospital who dreams of an independent lifestyle and wonders how he'd cope with his mood disturbances on his own.

Regarding the fragmentary nature of my writing, well, I've just never been able to do it otherwise. I have been trying to write a novel, but it's slow and uncertain work.

Peace,
Kazuki Mishima