[NaNoRenO 2010] The Silent Wolf

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majes
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[NaNoRenO 2010] The Silent Wolf

#1 Post by majes »

I am proud to announce the release of The Silent Wolf by myself and Izdubar as our contribution to NaNoRenO 2010!

This VN has been both a pleasure and a nightmare to produce. We didn't really start until about a week into March, and the majority of what you see in the VN was developed solely in the past week.

The Silent Wolf is a kinetic novel containing just under 13000 words. It is set several hundred years into the future after war and disease have ravaged humanity and various nations are just beginning to reclaim their former power. The nobility has grouped themselves into elite mercenary groups selling specialized services to the highest bidders. The Silent Wolf is the story of Sebastian Tell, a member of the Tell family of mercenaries descended from the Swiss Guard.

Below I've attached some sketches of the characters featuring in the game.

Theirn, Sebastian's Great Uncle:
Image
The General of the Spanish Empire:
Image
Anastasia's Father and village mayor:
Image
Spanish Army grunt:
Image
Anastasia, the heroine:
Image

I hope you enjoy playing it as much as we enjoyed making it!

Windows:
http://www.megaupload.com/?d=FQD2PORV

Linux:
http://www.megaupload.com/?d=UZEHO8PW

Mac:
http://www.megaupload.com/?d=8UWYF37P

V2Blast
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Re: [NaNoRenO 2010] The Silent Wolf

#2 Post by V2Blast »

As they say, "first!". :P

Downloading now - seems like an interesting subject.
Pie is delicious.

lordcloudx
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Re: [NaNoRenO 2010] The Silent Wolf

#3 Post by lordcloudx »

lzdubar and majes, I salute you. That was seriously one of the most well-written stories I've read in quite a while.

The plot by itself is pretty straightforward as soon as the perspective switches to Sebastian Tell's, but I have to commend the writer for his(her?) skills, that really brought the characters, events and settings to life. I started reading this VN with very low expectations based on the sketches in this thread and the short description and boy was I proven wrong.

The characters really felt alive, despite the short screen time given to some. Everyone just felt so authentic; from the general, to the soldiers, to the town mayor. I was already a bit skeptical about the game when I saw that it was about some mercenaries and it seemed to have a dystopian setting, but all my doubts were completely blown away as soon as I actually sat down to read this visual novel.

On the technical side, the text is hard to read at times, but not enough to completely detract from the experience. The music felt fittingly ironic. The character art gets the job done. I like the little sound effects like the gunshots coupled with grunts and screams in some parts of the game. There were a few typos, but they weren't glaringly noticeable.

Over-all, this was a really, really great hour or so of reading.
How do you make your games? I see. Thank you for the prompt replies, but it is my considered opinion that you're doing it wrong inefficiently because I am a perfushenal professional. Do it my way this way and we can all ascend VN Nirvana together while allowing me to stroke my ego you will improve much faster. Also, please don't forget to thank me for this constructive critique or I will cry and bore you to death respond appropriately with a tl;dr rant discourse of epic adequately lengthy proportions. - Sarcasm Veiled in Euphemism: Secrets of Forum Civility by lordcloudx (Coming soon to an online ebook near you.)

Wintermoon
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Re: [NaNoRenO 2010] The Silent Wolf

#4 Post by Wintermoon »

How did this escape notice for four months?

Overall, this felt fairly rough and unpolished, both in the text and the visuals. I know this is to be expected for a NaNoRenO project, but just a bit more proof-reading would have helped a lot. The sound effects also felt cheesy to me.

The story is a bit hard to follow, especially in the beginning with the (unlabeled) perspective changes. The character's voices are color-coded, but some of the colors are very similar, and I didn't really pay that much attention to them until a good way into the story.

The first scene in particular is problematic. No speech, hence no color-coding. I can't figure out how it fits into the rest of the story.
My first thought was that it was about Sebastian's father being killed, but that doesn't fit in with what is later revealed about Sebastian's father, i.e. that he is still alive.
Still, overall a very powerful story.

Another
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Re: [NaNoRenO 2010] The Silent Wolf

#5 Post by Another »

I can't say much that hasn't already been said. This is indeed a great story, I've had a wonderful time reading it. It's rare that I play a kinetic novel twice in a row, but this one was worth it. Thank you for sharing this! :D

I really appreciate the graphics and music choices, but I'm even more impressed by your writing skills (shown in the way some scenes mirror or are connected, in the implicit -but still understandable- elements from the dialogue with the general,...). Good job!

Yet, I'll also complain that the colors for the text were really difficult to distinguish on my LCD screen, and I had to read some sentences twice to find out who was speaking. Concerning the sound effects, I didn't find them cheesy at all, but sometimes intrusive. For my second playthrough, I reduced their volume to 50% and it felt much better.
Especially, the snore was almost comical because it was way too loud, and Sebastian's scream unnecessarily scared me to the bones although I was really expecting it...
Wintermoon wrote:The first scene (...) I can't figure out how it fits into the rest of the story.
It's the story that Sebastian's Mother is reading out before they get interrupted by Theirn.
My biggest concern about this scene is "what kind of mother would read such a creepy story to her young son?" :shock: . But some will say that our modern tales aren't free from blood either. Still...
... I wonder if the book didn't originally belong to Sebastian's father. It wouldn't be surprising from the Tell Family to give such readings to their children... And as this book actually gives more insight into the values of the noble families, it could well be a relic from Stellan's childhood. :?:
I hope you have other projects in mind, because I'd love to see what you can bring us next... :)

Wintermoon
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Re: [NaNoRenO 2010] The Silent Wolf

#6 Post by Wintermoon »

Another wrote:
It's the story that Sebastian's Mother is reading out before they get interrupted by Theirn.
That seems more plausible than any other explanation I can think of, but still somewhat iffy.
Like you yourself said, it's not the kind of story I would expect a mother to read to her six year old son, especially not a mother as protective of her son as Sebastian's mother. Subject matter aside, the writing style is different from what I would expect in a children's story. It also seems to me that the values of the noble families could have been demonstrated just as easily and more directly through an actual example without introducing a fiction within the fiction that is never mentioned again once the real story begins.

Another
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Re: [NaNoRenO 2010] The Silent Wolf

#7 Post by Another »

You're right, my answer is actually quite unconvincing. :?
Indeed, I can't find anything in the novel that explains why she reads out this book in particular.

Concerning the style of the fiction, I assumed that a six years old member of the Tell family might be much more intelligent than the average and understand books written like this (he's supposedly mature enough to start a potentially mortal training and the Tells do seem to have unusual abilities).

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Sheridan
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Re: [NaNoRenO 2010] The Silent Wolf

#8 Post by Sheridan »

The download link no longer works; is there an updated link? Thanks!

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