Dual Hearts

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lordcloudx
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Dual Hearts

#1 Post by lordcloudx »

written with... something on the author's mind... which I myself do not know. :P

Ya I know Atlus would probably hang me for stealing their game's title and KEY wouldn't exactly be flattered by that title screen.
This is my second visual novel. The storytelling is much more straight-forward and probably more suited to mainstream audiences than Wings. The skeleton plot for this story is taken from a songfic that I wrote long ago which can be found on the literary corner of this site. I added in some elements from dating sims, shoujo and action anime. Yes... that title screen is inspired from Air
get it here http://animerd2k2.freewebsites.com/project.htm
How do you make your games? I see. Thank you for the prompt replies, but it is my considered opinion that you're doing it wrong inefficiently because I am a perfushenal professional. Do it my way this way and we can all ascend VN Nirvana together while allowing me to stroke my ego you will improve much faster. Also, please don't forget to thank me for this constructive critique or I will cry and bore you to death respond appropriately with a tl;dr rant discourse of epic adequately lengthy proportions. - Sarcasm Veiled in Euphemism: Secrets of Forum Civility by lordcloudx (Coming soon to an online ebook near you.)

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mikey
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#2 Post by mikey »

I really like your take on ren'ai, the way the RD02 works handle romance. It shows in this one the most, a troubled personality of the girl and even though it's only through a small number of lines, there's a sense of drama in a style that's very close to just what I like my romance to be.

Seen objectively, I think you'll get a few responses that will point out how many loose ends or unexploited ideas there are. This could easily be a full-length VN, but that's a decision of the creator. Some of the backgrounds are also a bit vague and clash with some of the photographs. There's a lot of influences that I found for myself, it reminded me of several movies and stories, but I mean that in a good way.

About "copying" some presentation elements in Wings and also in Dual Hearts, I don't actually think it's something to look down on. If something works, it works.

A nice work, keep it up.

lordcloudx
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#3 Post by lordcloudx »

there's a sense of drama in a style that's very close to just what I like my romance to be.
hehe really? Then maybe I should have tightened up my art and put in more girls.

Actually, even the story is a rip of my own work. A xenogears songfic. I wrote roughly about two years ago.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/2810413/1/

Of course, I like to have my female characters have strong, but still kinda cute personalities with believable hang-ups. like Phaedra in this story.
http://animerd2k2.freewebsites.com/fire.htm

And Risa in that story's sequel "Dream Chasers" also falls into the same category. It's a stalled original fiction story using an experiment with three chapters and with each chapter told from the point of view of a different persona.
How do you make your games? I see. Thank you for the prompt replies, but it is my considered opinion that you're doing it wrong inefficiently because I am a perfushenal professional. Do it my way this way and we can all ascend VN Nirvana together while allowing me to stroke my ego you will improve much faster. Also, please don't forget to thank me for this constructive critique or I will cry and bore you to death respond appropriately with a tl;dr rant discourse of epic adequately lengthy proportions. - Sarcasm Veiled in Euphemism: Secrets of Forum Civility by lordcloudx (Coming soon to an online ebook near you.)

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mikey
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#4 Post by mikey »

lordcloudx wrote:hehe really? Then maybe I should have tightened up my art and put in more girls.
It was more the small things that I liked and that I found the romance in. The arguing over something insignificant or buying the shirt for example. :)

And ripping off your own work... isn't really wrong (or is it? :? ). I think if you present some of the ideas and plots to a very different audience (the VN players), it will always feel fresh. I never read fanfics for instance, so for me, all is new :P

kara24601
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#5 Post by kara24601 »

This game is in my favorites folder. I don't remember if there's anything I disliked about it , I can't remember any romantic elements in it , so maybe that'd be about my only complaint...if I remember correctly , it was more of a friendship thing or something. But , I'm probably wrong and will have to read it again.

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