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 Post subject: Haircuts - A Short KN
PostPosted: Sun Jan 30, 2011 3:30 pm 
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Joined: Sun Jan 23, 2011 2:58 pm
Posts: 77
Location: New York, NY
Completed: Haircuts, 99 Luftballons
Description: My first KN. It's very short and (hopefully) sweet. Or cute at least.
It starts off at the start of summer vacation, after the protagonist's freshman year. It's a story about a fateful haircut where the protagonist meets his crush, Samantha.

Genre: Kinetic Novel, BxG

Rating: E for Everyone

Please let me know what you guys think about it!

Image

Image


Attachments:
Haircuts-win32.zip [12.47 MiB]
Downloaded 1158 times
Haircuts-mac.zip [15.28 MiB]
Downloaded 1733 times
Haircuts-linux-x86.tar.bz2 [11.3 MiB]
Downloaded 289 times

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~Mau
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PostPosted: Sun Jan 30, 2011 7:54 pm 
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Joined: Fri Nov 19, 2010 5:54 pm
Posts: 97
Projects: Love Buffet
It's a little cliché but it's still cute. =)

Don't give up and keep trying--- I hope the next will be a full dating sim *winks*

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Love Buffet

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PostPosted: Sun Jan 30, 2011 8:08 pm 
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Joined: Sun Jan 23, 2011 2:58 pm
Posts: 77
Location: New York, NY
Completed: Haircuts, 99 Luftballons
Ah ha...dating sim?

I don't think I can code for THAT yet...maybe a regular ol' VN next.

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PostPosted: Sun Jan 30, 2011 8:22 pm 
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Joined: Fri Nov 19, 2010 5:54 pm
Posts: 97
Projects: Love Buffet
XD Hey, the ending is the same. Do more, do better.

;=) Just keep going, boy.

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Love Buffet

To read about (crackish) reviews for otome games, click here.


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 30, 2011 10:57 pm 
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Joined: Thu Aug 12, 2010 9:28 pm
Posts: 56
Location: USA
Projects: Too many~!
Congratulations on finishing your first KN! Haircuts was good! Simple, short, and sweet.

You’ve got a nice writing style, but there were a few typos in the game, so maybe next time ask someone to proofread your work. There’s always plenty of people here on the forums who’d love to help you out, so don’t be afraid to ask!

The music worked well with the story, especially when it changed after Samantha’s words. But I'd change the track again at the end, if I were you, since staying with the same sad, dramatic music for the rest of the story made the ending feel sad rather than happy. :(

The photo BGs were good too! But I would have really loved to have seen the inside of the barbershop when the main character entered, since seeing the outside while the main character got his haircut felt a little odd. But I know finding resources is hard, and it worked the way it did, but just a small suggestion to help immerse the player a bit more.

Overall, good job! Hope to see more games from you soon!

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PostPosted: Sun Jan 30, 2011 11:14 pm 
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Joined: Sun Jan 23, 2011 2:58 pm
Posts: 77
Location: New York, NY
Completed: Haircuts, 99 Luftballons
salis wrote:
Congratulations on finishing your first KN! Haircuts was good! Simple, short, and sweet.

You’ve got a nice writing style, but there were a few typos in the game, so maybe next time ask someone to proofread your work. There’s always plenty of people here on the forums who’d love to help you out, so don’t be afraid to ask!

The music worked well with the story, especially when it changed after Samantha’s words. But I'd change the track again at the end, if I were you, since staying with the same sad, dramatic music for the rest of the story made the ending feel sad rather than happy. :(

The photo BGs were good too! But I would have really loved to have seen the inside of the barbershop when the main character entered, since seeing the outside while the main character got his haircut felt a little odd. But I know finding resources is hard, and it worked the way it did, but just a small suggestion to help immerse the player a bit more.

Overall, good job! Hope to see more games from you soon!


Thanks for the input! Yeah, I did want to find an image for the inside of the barber shop, but I wasn't able to.
Making this was pretty fun, and I'm glad you enjoyed it. I plan to make more sometime, starting as soon as I find a program to clean up and edit my drawings...and as soon as I get those drawings to look better. :D

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PostPosted: Tue Mar 22, 2011 2:59 am 
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Joined: Tue Mar 22, 2011 2:53 am
Posts: 1
Really it will be best fro haircuts.....................................................

one can easily get benefit with this.

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PostPosted: Tue Mar 22, 2011 8:39 pm 
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Joined: Sun Jan 23, 2011 2:58 pm
Posts: 77
Location: New York, NY
Completed: Haircuts, 99 Luftballons
I...don't quite understand.

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PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2011 10:00 am 
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Joined: Thu Mar 31, 2011 10:20 am
Posts: 629
Completed: Finding A Murderer, Memory Loss, Crime Investigation, Stay away from the graveyard, Last Day at School, Lonesome, Email, Hired Gun, Dusk, Hired Gun 2, Man-at-arms, Hired Gun 3, The Phantom Caller, Street Girl, Free love, The Story of Isabel Claudia
It would have been a better game if there was character art.

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PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2011 2:31 pm 
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Joined: Sun Jan 23, 2011 2:58 pm
Posts: 77
Location: New York, NY
Completed: Haircuts, 99 Luftballons
Yeah, I would've done character art if I could. Sadly, my skills are not quite up to par.

I'm trying to figure out how to use dolls, but it's not going so well.

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