Your time for money? Is it right??

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Auro-Cyanide
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Re: Your time for money? Is it right??

#16 Post by Auro-Cyanide » Wed Apr 20, 2011 10:19 am

Sorry, double post >_>

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Re: Your time for money? Is it right??

#17 Post by Auro-Cyanide » Wed Apr 20, 2011 10:19 am

... How old are you exactly? And more to the point, how old is he?

Right now, you are escorting. That is when someone is paid to keep someone company. Which is fine if that is what you want. But the question is why he feels he has to pay you to hang out with him. Either he has some really serious confidence issues or he wants something. The problem could arise that he thinks that he has 'earned' something from you. But remember no one can force you to do something you don't want, no matter how many gifts they give you.

From my experience with the opposite sex, I would be REALLLLLLY suspicious. Depending on my instincts about the guy I would either a) cut of all connection and never talk to him again b) tell him I'm not interested or c) tell him that if he wants to court me, he is doing it wrong.

But like I said, I don't know the guy. There may be social or cultural things going on that I don't know about. While I highly doubt males of different cultures actually DON'T all think about the same thing, they may all go about it differently. For all I know, this may be normal. I have had my fair share of creepy guys though. What are your thoughts on the matter? What is your gut reaction to him? And at the end of the day, if you don't like him, just say so.

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Re: Your time for money? Is it right??

#18 Post by pondrthis » Wed Apr 20, 2011 10:24 am

Don't try to return or reject the gifts, that's just hurtful. It's not like he can return most of the stuff he bought if it's stuffed animals and flowers.

Be straight with the guy. Either say, "This was fun, but it's never going to be more than a job (if you know what I mean)" or, "Look, you don't have to pay me anymore, I like being around you."

I personally think the guy sounds like a weirdo, but maybe no more weird than this guy who's pursuing one of my female friends right now... in any case, you aren't respecting yourself by selling your company for X dollars. Any time a person isn't being respected by either herself or people around her she will begin to develop confidence issues (which can harm you for a long time, since they only get worse).

DISCLAIMER: I'm a guy. I don't know about girls' feelings as much as I pretend to, although the fact that I grew up around and hang out with girls exclusively might give me a little cred. I personally don't think the guy is trying to get sex, though... if he's audacious enough to ask to be introduced to someone, then he's audacious enough to find an easier target (and there is ALWAYS an easier target, especially if he's willing to pay, hahahaha). I'd guess he's just disgustingly awkward and socially inept... I hate those guys. Probably because I was never that bad with girls, but my life was made miserable as a youngster because I was bad with guys. Now I take it out on those guys by rubbing it in their faces that they suck with women!!! Bwahahaha!

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Re: Your time for money? Is it right??

#19 Post by pondrthis » Wed Apr 20, 2011 10:27 am

Auro-Cyanide wrote:While I highly doubt males of different cultures actually DON'T all think about the same thing

Don't you think that's just a touch rude?

It's okay, I still love you, but don't be that way. Surely not EVERY male you've ever come across has tried to get in your pants.

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Re: Your time for money? Is it right??

#20 Post by platonicheart » Wed Apr 20, 2011 10:30 am

choklitchan wrote:Not odd as in interesting-odd, which I like, but odd as in creepy/weird odd. Though ketchup on ice cream sounds just as gross-odd. :P Well, to each his own...
Expecting more, I meant by physical favors. Take advantage of you. As a fellow girl, I'm begging you to be careful.
Oww...I thought odd-interesting...:lol: As for the ketchup on ice cream, you should ought to try it some time, its quite good :lol:

Physical favors??? I don't think so for his case, I mean, judging from the personality I see from him, he's quite shy and my friend told me that he was rather bold in asking her to introduce him to me. I'll keep in mind to not be careless :)

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Re: Your time for money? Is it right??

#21 Post by Auro-Cyanide » Wed Apr 20, 2011 10:38 am

pondrthis wrote:
Auro-Cyanide wrote:While I highly doubt males of different cultures actually DON'T all think about the same thing

Don't you think that's just a touch rude?

It's okay, I still love you, but don't be that way. Surely not EVERY male you've ever come across has tried to get in your pants.

It is a hyperbole, yes. I was making a point that males are similar the world over. I know not every male is as dedicated to sex as the next. However it does come as a high priority to most what was it, on average males think about sex every 45 seconds or something?. And you know is is true ;) though there are a lot of females who are exactly the same.

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Re: Your time for money? Is it right??

#22 Post by platonicheart » Wed Apr 20, 2011 10:38 am

Auro-Cyanide wrote:... How old are you exactly? And more to the point, how old is he?

Right now, you are escorting. That is when someone is paid to keep someone company. Which is fine if that is what you want. But the question is why he feels he has to pay you to hang out with him. Either he has some really serious confidence issues or he wants something. The problem could arise that he thinks that he has 'earned' something from you. But remember no one can force you to do something you don't want, no matter how many gifts they give you.

From my experience with the opposite sex, I would be REALLLLLLY suspicious. Depending on my instincts about the guy I would either a) cut of all connection and never talk to him again b) tell him I'm not interested or c) tell him that if he wants to court me, he is doing it wrong.

But like I said, I don't know the guy. There may be social or cultural things going on that I don't know about. While I highly doubt males of different cultures actually DON'T all think about the same thing, they may all go about it differently. For all I know, this may be normal. I have had my fair share of creepy guys though. What are your thoughts on the matter? What is your gut reaction to him? And at the end of the day, if you don't like him, just say so.
I'm 16 y/o and he's were on the same age level.
Escorting??? Sorry, but I really don't know the difference between escorting and hanging out. I just think that, at first, it was quite troublesome to hang out with my friend's friend. And if I were to evaluate him, it's like he's a pure type. Really, he's more fragile than a girl. As for my thoughts, I did tell him that its okay not to pay me anymore and said that we could just keep in touch with texting. But he said that if that's the case, he qould do anything just for us to meet as often as possible, which I really don't know why he keeps on being stubborn like that. Also, it's not that I don't like him. We have some same interests and I find it quite amusing to here contradictions and opinions about that interest. Though, I'm starting to think he may be a good friend of mine eventually.

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Re: Your time for money? Is it right??

#23 Post by platonicheart » Wed Apr 20, 2011 10:46 am

pondrthis wrote:Don't try to return or reject the gifts, that's just hurtful. It's not like he can return most of the stuff he bought if it's stuffed animals and flowers.

Be straight with the guy. Either say, "This was fun, but it's never going to be more than a job (if you know what I mean)" or, "Look, you don't have to pay me anymore, I like being around you."

I personally think the guy sounds like a weirdo, but maybe no more weird than this guy who's pursuing one of my female friends right now... in any case, you aren't respecting yourself by selling your company for X dollars. Any time a person isn't being respected by either herself or people around her she will begin to develop confidence issues (which can harm you for a long time, since they only get worse).

DISCLAIMER: I'm a guy. I don't know about girls' feelings as much as I pretend to, although the fact that I grew up around and hang out with girls exclusively might give me a little cred. I personally don't think the guy is trying to get sex, though... if he's audacious enough to ask to be introduced to someone, then he's audacious enough to find an easier target (and there is ALWAYS an easier target, especially if he's willing to pay, hahahaha). I'd guess he's just disgustingly awkward and socially inept... I hate those guys. Probably because I was never that bad with girls, but my life was made miserable as a youngster because I was bad with guys. Now I take it out on those guys by rubbing it in their faces that they suck with women!!! Bwahahaha!
Knowing your a guy, I bet your saying the truth about being hurt when your gifts are returned. So maybe I should say I'm sorry. really?? His type is weird? Why is he weird? Well, me selling my time was at first just a plain joke turned to a serious matter. And I can't imagine him thinking of lewd stuff since he's quite formal when with me and more formal if with others. Well, what do you think about him?

Really? Then, may I take the chance to guess your type...are you a play boy perhaps?? :) just joking :D.

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Re: Your time for money? Is it right??

#24 Post by platonicheart » Wed Apr 20, 2011 10:53 am

Auro-Cyanide wrote:
pondrthis wrote:
Auro-Cyanide wrote:While I highly doubt males of different cultures actually DON'T all think about the same thing

Don't you think that's just a touch rude?

It's okay, I still love you, but don't be that way. Surely not EVERY male you've ever come across has tried to get in your pants.

It is a hyperbole, yes. I was making a point that males are similar the world over. I know not every male is as dedicated to sex as the next. However it does come as a high priority to most what was it, on average males think about sex every 45 seconds or something?. And you know is is true ;) though there are a lot of females who are exactly the same.
@Auro-cyanide: is that a fact??? I really am clueless when it comes to guys because I think they are rather boring. Also, my high school life gave me headaches regarding guys because they keep talking to me every now and then even if I don't know some of them. I just really don't get what's going through the minds of those guys? Do they really want to befriend me that badly to the point of making me uncomfortable with their unknown smiles???

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Re: Your time for money? Is it right??

#25 Post by pondrthis » Wed Apr 20, 2011 10:55 am

Auro-Cyanide wrote: It is a hyperbole, yes. I was making a point that males are similar the world over. I know not every male is as dedicated to sex as the next. However it does come as a high priority to most what was it, on average males think about sex every 45 seconds or something?. And you know is is true ;) though there are a lot of females who are exactly the same.

Actually, I know it's NOT true. I personally hate sex for the very reason that it's an excuse for women to look down on me as "base" when they're all high-and-mighty, just because I've got things dangling down there and they don't. My little sister is a damn nymphomaniac, yet she doesn't get the same treatment. My girlfriend wants sex at least five times more often than I do (and masturbates more often to boot) and it's stressful to deal with someone's desires when you don't want to (as any married woman will tell you about what it's like to deal with her "miserably persistent", "annoying" husband). I give her 5-10 orgasms (she's very easy to please) and sometimes I don't even finish once T.T which of course she then gets upset about, claiming she must not be attractive enough.

And when people throw that in my face, they say 17 seconds.

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Re: Your time for money? Is it right??

#26 Post by platonicheart » Wed Apr 20, 2011 11:00 am

@pondrthis: is sex really important in a relationship??? I mean, it sucks to be in that kind of relationship if it would be an obligation to do such things. But, I think I have to agree with auro-cyanide, i've read one article stating that most males are dogs for sex... though females are also like that, so i'm siding on you a little.

May I ask how old are you??

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Re: Your time for money? Is it right??

#27 Post by pondrthis » Wed Apr 20, 2011 11:07 am

platonicheart wrote:Why is he weird? Well, me selling my time was at first just a plain joke turned to a serious matter. And I can't imagine him thinking of lewd stuff since he's quite formal when with me and more formal if with others. Well, what do you think about him?

It's weird to pay a girl to go out with you. Most people just, you know, ask someone out and drop it if they say no.

Formality and manners don't mean much. Don't trust them to judge a person, go with your gut response. Of course, you might be too young to have developed a keen gut response, so... maybe ask your parent(s)? They know more than kids give them credit for (and less than adults give them credit for).
Really? Then, may I take the chance to guess your type...are you a play boy perhaps?? :) just joking :D.
I've been called that before. I don't jump from girl to girl, but I'm very flirtatious: apparently in a way that flatters people rather than creeps them out. It's just how I interact with people after they've crossed my social business barrier.
is sex really important in a relationship??? I mean, it sucks to be in that kind of relationship if it would be an obligation to do such things. But, I think I have to agree with auro-cyanide, i've read one article stating that most males are dogs for sex... though females are also like that, so i'm siding on you a little.

May I ask how old are you??

Sex is important in a relationship because it eases feminine body-image concerns and prevents feelings of guilt for "wanting it more than your partner". This is especially true since my girlfriend is Christian and I'm not religious: if she wanted sex and I was the pure one, it would hurt her spiritually. As to whether it's an obligation, no, for the love of God, it's not. I go along with it because it's not really that big a deal to me. You should make your own decisions about sexuality, but remember that people will only praise you for abstaining. NEVER feel pressured to engage in sexual acts.

I'm a graduate student, 22 years old. I'm a little younger than other graduate students, but not too young to know about relationships. EDIT: (Well, it helps that I had a 6 year long one and am now in another serious relationship...)
Last edited by pondrthis on Wed Apr 20, 2011 11:07 am, edited 1 time in total.

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Re: Your time for money? Is it right??

#28 Post by pondrthis » Wed Apr 20, 2011 11:22 am

PS: "Escorting" is something that traditionally goes hand-in-hand with prostitution, which is why AuCN keeps warning you that the guy might be expecting sex. AuCN hasn't been too great about being clear in this thread, she's used a lot of "you should know what that means".

Seriously, AuCN. The girl might NOT know what you mean, and that would be the most dangerous circumstance.

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Re: Your time for money? Is it right??

#29 Post by Auro-Cyanide » Wed Apr 20, 2011 11:28 am

@Pondrthis. I was being tongue-in-cheek. No offence meant. I know how it rolls with males and females. I have a female friend whom I pretty sure never stops thinking about sex. I was just making an exaggeration to platonicheart that she may need to be careful of what someone wants when they are paying her that much attention. There are men like that everywhere. Not all men obviously, but sometimes you have to be careful. Like I said, I have had way too many creepy run ins with some particular males, one of which may have been arrested for sexual transgressions. If your instincts are telling you something is wrong, sometimes it is best to assume the worst of the male instead of getting hurt. So, sorry if I offended, I have nothing against males or what may or may not be their sexual thought pattern. I was using a hyperbolic stereotype to underline a statement.

Escorting doesn't always go hand in hand with prostitution. Some professionals just don't do it... But I was hoping she knew what I meant. I was trying to avoid being too direct in the case I was getting the wrong end of the stick. I didn't want to be jumping to unnecessary conclusions about the guy, which is why I mentioned that I didn't know him, that she should trust her own instincts and that yes, a lot of guys think about sex so you have to be careful.

...I'm not sure what I am saying any more. I really should go to bed >_>

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Re: Your time for money? Is it right??

#30 Post by platonicheart » Wed Apr 20, 2011 11:29 am

It's weird to pay a girl to go out with you. Most people just, you know, ask someone out and drop it if they say no.

Formality and manners don't mean much. Don't trust them to judge a person, go with your gut response. Of course, you might be too young to have developed a keen gut response, so... maybe ask your parent(s)? They know more than kids give them credit for (and less than adults give them credit for).

Just now i told the guy that I don't want to get paid anymore (since I received a call for a high paying part time) and then the guy asked me if I could still hang out with him then said to me to do not mind what he said then told asked me again if we still can be close... ugh, he's like an indecisive person. What should I do to him? Well, I have an ability, maybe, to feel what a person is, bad,good, double-face, something like that. And from what m instinct is telling me, he's an interesting person since from time to time he's bringing color to my day by discussing trivial things which my friend told me that he never does since he's so shy.

Also, if we were to hang out together in a "nonn-paying level" would it be could a date? I'm nearing the age of 17 and still knows nothing about the difference of "guy friends" from "guy falling for you". How could I know a guy's feeling? Because, I think it's quite dangerous for me not know the difference. I've been told that I'm a blockhead and ignorant by some guys and I simply don't know why. It's quite puzzling for me you know.
I've been called that before. I don't jump from girl to girl, but I'm very flirtatious: apparently in a way that flatters people rather than creeps them out. It's just how I interact with people after they've crossed my social business barrier.
Ow...i'm puzzled.... :?
Sex is important in a relationship because it eases feminine body-image concerns and prevents feelings of guilt for "wanting it more than your partner". This is especially true since my girlfriend is Christian and I'm not religious: if she wanted sex and I was the pure one, it would hurt her spiritually. As to whether it's an obligation, no, for the love of God, it's not. I go along with it because it's not really that big a deal to me. You should make your own decisions about sexuality, but remember that people will only praise you for abstaining. NEVER feel pressured to engage in sexual acts.

I'm a graduate student, 22 years old. I'm a little younger than other graduate students, but not too young to know about relationships.
Hmmm...I understand. In our class, one never fails to talk about it from time to time, even linking it to our class subjects. It's like having sex education every day. It's like a laughing matter to me right now. (just joking)

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