Get that thing off your chest... Now...

[DeeKay]

@Kuroneko_rg
Dang, I feel for you. It always comes off as a big blow when bonds you thought were solid just shadder to pieces, moreso if you don't put your trust easily on others..
Hopefully, the sun will shine brightly for you soon enough ! Cheer up

[Kuroneko_rg]

You are so nice Deekay, thanks a lot for your words of support :3

[DeeKay]

You are so nice Deekay, thanks a lot for your words of support :3

I'm just genuinely worried. As long as you don't beat yourself up for what you think are your own mistakes only, it's fine.

[Sapphi]

Thank you for the hugs and concern. I'm alright now, I got to my uni safely and had a cup of tea with muffin at our cafeteria.
I'm just this anemic girl with constant hypotensia and vegetovascular dystonia. There's nothing really wrong with me, we have check ups every year and stuff. I don't eat much in the morning because taking food that early only makes sick.
Sometimes this happens. Because of stress, because of lack of sleep, because there was big crowd and I couldn't breathe.

I'm worried about you
Take it easy! I can't lose my new-found twin, lol.

On the topic of not being able to eat in the morning... why does it feel as though every time you post I'm looking into a mirror? I struggled with being unable to eat in the morning for awhile (sometimes still). My doctor told me I probably had acid reflux, and put me on proton-pump inhibitor (Prevacid) for awhile. I was waking up with terrible pains in my stomach (possibly not helped by the elastic band shorts I was sleeping in that constantly rode up around my stomach) and one day after a normal breakfast of pancakes and a small glass of orange juice I had to run to the bathroom because I suddenly felt so nauseous. I think general anxiety was playing a big role though. I was pretty stressed out socially speaking. I was on and off Prevacid as I thought it necessary and it seemed to help...

Then it swung in the opposite direction and I started to wonder if I actually have too little stomach acid. Because now usually when I get nauseous, the only thing that makes me feel better is sour candy or salt and vinegar chips... the common denominator being malic acid. Yum... I love me some delicious malic acid...

Back on topic, I can't breathe in crowds either... I start to get lightheaded and my skin gets all pin-prickly. But you're lucky to live in a place where there are decent people. I tend to expect that if that had happened in a Chicago subway, the best you could expect is a footprint on your back and maybe some complaints about how you were in their way. Then again, I'm massively pessimistic about city people based on my (admittedly limited) experiences. City people, why u so snooty and rude? ლ(；Д；ლ)

Anyway, take care of yourself!
That's an order!!

[Mink]

Chiming in with the fact crowds make me nervous, and when I'm nervous I have the urge to laugh hysterically. 8|

[papillon]

*hugs aedin if wanted*

That sort of thing is such a huge emotional rollercoaster, no matter whether it's wanted or unwanted, successful or sadly lost.

One reason I don't have kids is that pregnancy outright scares me. (There are other reasons but that one's true too.) Despite all the advances of medicine, it's still unpredictable, both for the baby and for the mother.

[Taosym]

sour candy or salt and vinegar chips...

I'm feeling kinda hungry now..

[Reikun]

I feel very bad lately. I find that when I'm with people I can uphold a certain amount of positivity, but as soon as I'm alone the self-deprecating thoughts start to creep in. I'm miserable and sleep-deprived pretty much all the time these days. I hardly have time to draw stuff for projects and then I end up guilt-tripping myself for being slow on working on things. Sometimes I draw stuff to try to get my mind off things, but in the end all I can think about is how inadequate and generally not-good-enough it is. I hate my school work and the one friend I could generally talk to about anything was just sent away to Japan by her family where she has no internet access and all my other irl friends are too busy having productive lives. UGH. I am just disgusted with myself. I feel like I am slowly getting worse at everything everyday. I've certainly been feeling increasingly more terrible for a while now. /sigh

[DeeKay]

I feel very bad lately. I find that when I'm with people I can uphold a certain amount of positivity, but as soon as I'm alone the self-deprecating thoughts start to creep in. I'm miserable and sleep-deprived pretty much all the time these days. I hardly have time to draw stuff for projects and then I end up guilt-tripping myself for being slow on working on things. Sometimes I draw stuff to try to get my mind off things, but in the end all I can think about is how inadequate and generally not-good-enough it is. I hate my school work and the one friend I could generally talk to about anything was just sent away to Japan by her family where she has no internet access and all my other irl friends are too busy having productive lives. UGH. I am just disgusted with myself. I feel like I am slowly getting worse at everything everyday. I've certainly been feeling increasingly more terrible for a while now. /sigh

Hmm... do you have any hobbies you like to take your mind off things ? Like reading, video games, etc.. ? This could help out from time to time.

[Reikun]

Hmm... do you have any hobbies you like to take your mind off things ? Like reading, video games, etc.. ? This could help out from time to time.

Oh gosh. I... don't have a hobby..... (.___.);;;; Maybe I should go get one???
I guess I like to play games, but for me the distraction only lasts as long as I'm playing '''OTL But there is this autobiography I borrowed from the library recently. I should probably read it...

[Victoria Jennings]

@Reikun: I'm pretty much going through the same thing, 'cept I do happen to have a pretty good friend at school. Sadly, I'm only ever happy if they're around, and once they're not, I just sink into the pit of depression again. Unfortunately, I don't really have any advice... well, except, um... hobbies are good and all, but make sure they don't grow out of control and become an addiction. *been there, in the middle of that freaking internet*

---

Nothing ever works. It might help for a little bit, but in the end, I just get back to this horrible, horrible place. I know that life is supposed to have its ups and downs, but for me, the ups just aren't worth the downs. They never last that long anyway.

...

[KittyKatStar]

Huuuuuuugh.

Agreed to work every 2nd Sunday since someone was unable to. I agreed to it because I would still have time with my BF (who has Sundays off work.) Cut to next week after my Sunday shift, I find out the other person decided she can't do any Sundays at all, so I'll be working every Sunday. If I'd known, I wouldn't have agreed. =<

So now I'll be working Sat and Sun, the days my boyfriend has *his* days off. ;_;

[Razz]

I turned on my webcam by accident...am I really that fug? I look fine in the mirror wtf.

[Aedin]

*hugs aedin if wanted*

That sort of thing is such a huge emotional rollercoaster, no matter whether it's wanted or unwanted, successful or sadly lost.

One reason I don't have kids is that pregnancy outright scares me. (There are other reasons but that one's true too.) Despite all the advances of medicine, it's still unpredictable, both for the baby and for the mother.

*hugs*

Thanks. It's definitely been an emotional few months for all of us.
If I ever have children, it'll most likely be by adoption or foster care. The idea of carrying another life freaks me out. Plus, the whole birthing process does not appeal to me. Why bring in another life when so many children don't have parents?

[Victoria Jennings]

Why bring in another life when so many children don't have parents?

It's biological imperative. For the most part, we're wired to want our genes to pass down to the next generation. This manifests in two things: our desire to have sex, and the more overt desire to have children of your own. For the people who didn't, their line would die out, and so on.