Get that thing off your chest... Now...

[Ionait]

-no longer relevant-

[Sapphi]

Sometimes I miss the days when we weren't all connected to funny people...

Thoughts like this come up in my mind from time to time, although for a slightly different reason. It's sometimes reassuring to find people who are like me on the internet ("I'm not alone in the world!") but other times it's downright horrifying ("What, somebody this similar to me exists? I can feel my value decreasing as I read their words...").

I have also read somebody on a personality forum confess that they get defensive IRL when a person who is too similar to them joins their group of friends. Nobody wants to lose their special role... in person of course it's much rarer that you find somebody so similar to you.

As the global community gets more and more connected, I wonder how our perceptions of ourselves as individuals will change.

Oh yeah, and by the way, I too have come up with witty remarks only to find that they were already made popular by somebody else. So I understand your frustration.

[Semienigma]

I am in a financial slump and am living with my parents. The only thing is they have this weird thing about treating me like I"m 5 but asking me for money when they "need" it. Normally I don't mind, but its come down to the point that my room isn't mine apparently and my mom likes to come in and dictate how it should look in there. Never mind that I have a full time job and little time to relax. Plus my art supplies tend to end up everywhere. And when my darling mother is pissy about something she cleans. And my dad who literally does nothing around the house ((never goes to work)) likes to just go in there when I"m not home and complain about how my room looks.

If I could just lock the door with a key that would be great but I can't. It's frustrating that I apparently don't have personal space anywhere. Thought the good thing is now I am having no qualms about just dropping my parents and moving out without telling them if they are going to threaten me to clean my room every week.

I"m just venting here, there isn't much of a solution other than me moving out. Don't get me wrong, I love my parents and I understand they will never see me as an adult completely. Even though I have lived on my own for some time, I just lost my job and haven't been able to get one that pays enough for rent where I live. Roomates kind of scarred me for life. But seriously, All I ask is for my room to be my private space where I can relax.

Okay venting done XD

[mugenjohncel]

MY CINTIQ TOUCH BROKE

"POOF" (Goes into extended sulking mode...)

[mugenjohncel]

MY CINTIQ TOUCH BROKE

A visit to the store where I got it told me to wait for 45 days to see if my Cintiq can get fixed... so that means for 45 days... I'll have to draw like everybody else... using good old fashioned tablets and that is "if" they can fix it...

(Goes into extended sulking mode...)

Nope... Not this time... Sulking will not get anything done... might as well go and create more backgrounds and perfect the one thing I've been trying to achieve... to find a way to make beautiful original BG's for OELVN's (aka Visual Novels) minus the effort... this is the UNCLE MUGEN way!

"POOF" (OK... let me sulk a bit more... just give me a day or two...)

[LVUER]

Didn't you just broke your Cintiq a while ago? What happened this time? A cintiq is like $2,000+. If I ever broke one... well, I don't know. I never have anything that expensive before. Seriously.

[mugenjohncel]

Didn't you just broke your Cintiq a while ago? What happened this time?

Oh you mean the Old Refurbished one?... It's sort of broken... it still functions as a monitor though... Unfortunately, the newer Cintiq Touch I got is now behaving the same way... no pen response, not even gestures are working and this one is brand new...

I still have my old Bamboo though and in worse case scenario I can use my iPad as a temporary substitute to draw things but I need to get used to the lag and the unintended accidental gestures and presses... In the extreme worst case scenario I could once again beg my wife to give me permission to tap into our contingency / emergency funds and buy a new one...

"POOF" (Disappears)

[enta]

I officially turned 17 yesterday.

...Not something to be happy about at all. (;__; )

I want to become a 7 year old again!

---------------

On the more serious side, I started reading Kojiki and old Japanese words and songs keeps rumbling inside my mind. I think I read the book too much my head hurt the whole day. Not really the best thing to do in your birthday, huh?

[kura-ou]

I've just been running out of time lately, but I keep trying to put forth extra effort needed for my classes @__@;;; I want summer break to come, but hate the summer in this place and I can't say that I look forward to finals.

Also, because of previous issues, my feelings seem unstable and switch from happy to depressed, depressed to angry, angry to happy...and it's just all confusing.

I also don't want the end of May to come because I have to pay bills again (and school kind of made me broke [again] ><;;;;) I really despise this endless cycle of saving up and then spending most of my funds for school or food (because we don't even stock that much food at home ;-; ), and then [trying to save] saving up again. There are times when I want to hit my head on a wall when I compare costs of living in California and elsewhere. And yet, charging for art at minimum wage sounds like highway robbery to some people (I haven't experienced it here, THANK GOODNESS ;A; People are very understanding here...), but on deviantART, and even in some emails, I'll get a few offers like "$20 for a group poster of anime characters" or something. Once, someone offered me $110 for THIRTY full-body CGs... (Please don't get me started on the dA point system and how it makes it so much worse for more serious artists/artists in "desperate need")

I'm so glad that the 'commissioner' got tired of waiting for spec work and turned to her friend who "drew much better" and worked for free. And speaking of commissioners, I've had this one commissioner that tends to run away from details and leaves me hanging for a month. Some serious commissioners wouldn't mind a 3-5 day delay from artists when it's just for discussing the details of a commission, but this guy has it backwards. He's done it twice, and I'm pretty sure that since over 2 months has almost elapsed, he's not going to reply.

I'm just mentioning it here because unlike many commissioners I've dealt with, he used unprofessional language like "We're in no damned hurry" and "what do you think we're paying you for?" when he's never even discussed anything about his visual novel project and its progress and has never discussed any art completion deadlines or payment of any kind. It makes me lulz a bit.

I get really antsy when people ask me to work for free, because as an artist, I feel as though I've improved a lot from a few years back. I still take free rough sketch requests at least once per year, but I invest a lot of time in experimenting and [trying to] progress from my current level. I'm not an art major, or even a professional freelancer. I'm just a full-time student with a love for drawing this anime-styled art, and if I can use whatever little of my skill to make sure that I have some funds for school and necessities, then it shouldn't be wrong to put myself up for hire.

Of course, I'm closed now ^^;;; but these are just my general feelings as an amateur freelance artist.

And speaking of that, I do have a *GENERAL* ToS that's been left unaltered for at least 6 months :l It's even linked in my current commissions journal. I don't copy/paste terms from there to here because a lot of people don't like reading long ToS'es, but it does exist >.> It details commissioner etiquette and time periods for meeting deadlines, as well as when a commissioner can ask for a refund, full or otherwise. And for the record, the list of people who've previously commissioned me from 2010 onward is also linked in my current commissions journal. If I were really a dishonest and scamming artist, that many people wouldn't have commissioned me. "Talk is cheap," but the list sure doesn't lie. I don't like it when people judge me before they see the real details, because it has happened before (on an emotionally-damaging account).

At the moment, I'm just *hoping* that I'll make enough funds from my sales to stay afloat for a month .___. I think being financially unstable is also a factor for my depression (and I hate it...SOOOO MUCH). I don't want to rely on my parents for anything, because we're already poor. I still remember the times when we couldn't afford medicine or check-ups, and that was really scary to me.

I want to get out of this stupid financial hole, but *sigh*. I had hoped that a little over a month ago, that selling on eBay would help, but it made it worse. I want to keep my chin up even though time's running out. I still have commissions to finish, but thankfully, all my commissioners are understanding ;-;

I keep thinking that if I do stay afloat, that a month or so from now when all my commissions are finished, that I'd give something back to this community. It's the only community that I can go to vent, and it's the only one with the some of the most kindest people I've ever met. I've met a few nice people on dA and have stayed friends with the majority of them, but there are so many unnecessary trolls on dA. They just live to rip people down, and I wish that they had better things to do with their time than waste it making other people feel bad. I admit that I had a similar depression when I first posted here, and I guess that's normal when no one knows who you are aside from the few posts you've made.

I hope that 2013 can be a better year for me.

[mugenjohncel]

Something is telling me that Lemmasoft forums are getting a "little" bit odd and cranky lately...

Nowadays, people complain on even the tiniest of things. Nobody's perfect as they say... Lemmasoft has been the unofficial hub and the place to go if you wanted to try and get your feet wet into making your own OELVN (because I believe OELVN is a better term than EVN) and it will stay that way for a very long time... I've been noticing this... "Trend" I'm not good at English but let's just say everyone is getting a bit cranky, rude and way WAY too serious. I don't know about you people but I create OELVN's for my own personal enjoyment and I certainly wanted others especially newer members to experience the same joy... Or at least let them engage in forum activities stress free...

But what do I see today?... It's basically not the Lemmasoft I fell in love when I first joined... Back then, everyone is easy going. Your work sucks... Fine, we all laugh... But at least you accomplished something now try harder next time... Stress free, no pressure. No rude replies and especially NO DOUCHEBAGS!!!... Now... When I look at the majority of the posts... I say to myself... Aren't we at lemmasoft getting ruder and ruder by the day... I know there is this saying in English that goes by... If you cannot withstand the heat then get out of the kitchen... But that is for politics and should not belong in Lemmasoft. So many threads about recommendations, debates and suggestions on how to make the forums "better"... Lemmasoft is slowly getting way too political, too bureaucratic and not much actual OELVN work being done.

I know some of the older users are getting tired of the same old routine from the recruitment threads where you see a new user who is probably naive but very much enthusiastic and eager to try out making his first VN... Back then we welcome it with open arms, maybe a few comments and suggestions and the typical "ZOMG! LOOKING FORWARD TO YOUR GAME!" it's not much but it makes one feel welcome and in time will be a regular then a veteran but now?... I hate to say this but Lemmasoft is slowly becoming really rude that it scares most new ones that had the potential to become the next UNCLE MUGEN or even become a future JACK who will be doing commercial OELVN's or SAKE-CHAN or TALEWEAVER (whose talent in writing I envy too much to the point that if I had a brain extractor and a way to transfer all that knowledge to me I would not hesitate to use it) or even someone that will make a whole engine from scratch like PYTOM... Lemmasoft people are maybe Jaded perhaps but still not a good enough excuse to be rude. Like I said a while ago... You people worry too much about the details. I'm even beginning to see a very disturbing trend where people are coming up with more rules and stuff which I personally find somewhat ridiculous especially for a site like Lemmasoft whose core focus (at least that's what I believe) is to facilitate and encourage the creation of OELVN's in the least stressful manner...

Now I will stop talking because I am about to run out of English words but long story short...

PEOPLE OF LEMMASOFT! LIGHTEN UP A BIT AND DON'T FORGET TO HAVE FUN! YOU WAY TOO SERIOUS!!!...

"POOF" (Disappears)

[Blue Lemma]

*e-hugs for uncle mugen*
Take a deep breath... in... out...

You have some legitimate points there. Some of it is inevitable with large communities, but I know I could personally lighten up more around here ^^; Some others, too.

Games are for fun, games are for fun

[LVUER]

Yeah, Uncle Mugen makes a good point. May be it's because LSF is getting more professional (commercial) and more serious as the result. Especially since LSF have somewhat become the center of OELVN. We used to be laid back and praise everything.

[Hijiri]

Yeah, Uncle Mugen makes a good point. May be it's because LSF is getting more professional (commercial) and more serious as the result. Especially since LSF have somewhat become the center of OELVN. We used to be laid back and praise everything.

A lot of people on this forum still praises everything, so not much has changed since I first joined.

Honestly, we've all changed over the years. Just look through your posts and you can see just how jaded we've all become over time |D

[Obscura]

+1

There were seriously about 30 WIPs I was super excited about upon joining LSF over a year ago. The number released out of those 30 have been 4. Understandable, because most of them are free and the creators have lives unlike my sorry ass here, but I rarely open any WIP threads anymore. Even if I do and the game looks great, I doubt my cheerleading will have any ultimate effect.

[PyTom]

The fundamental change in the forum - since the "good old days" - is that it's no longer possible to play every game this community makes. We've largely reinvented ourselves as a community of creators, which is good, but it means that people have to go outside of LSF if they want to find an audience. Back in 2006, if you played 10 games, you played most of the communities's output. Nowadays, that might be a couple of weeks of output - or less than a week, if we have an event that just ended.

I think our biggest problem, right now, is we have people who consider themselves creators, but act like players - or something else entirety. Some of them act like the morality police - if a game comes about that doesn't interest them, they try to talk the creator out of making it. If a newbie isn't up to their standards, they try to run them off - or act rude, by linking them to self-made FAQ threads, rather than talking to them directly. I think the worst crime on this forum is to try to talk people out of making the game they have their heart set on making, just because that game isn't up to your standards.

We need to stop that, and realize that we need to embrace creators - even those who are creating games we'll never play. That means going out of our way to be polite to newbies, since today's newbies are tomorrow's regulars and next year's veterans. At the very least, if you can't be polite to someone, if you can't be encouraging to someone - don't say anything. Let someone else answer.

I get the feeling that there are a few people who feel that their opinions are so important, they have to be expressed, even if they're not helpful. And I think that's the current problem - it would be far better if those people said nothing.