Get that thing off your chest... Now...

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Mammon
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Re: Get that thing off your chest... Now...

#5101 Post by Mammon » Sat Nov 19, 2016 7:02 am

mugenjohncel wrote:"POOF" (Disappears)
Oh... that suddenly has a whole deeper meaning to it.
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Re: Get that thing off your chest... Now...

#5102 Post by nekobara » Sun Nov 20, 2016 5:45 am

So, um, I don't want to sound like I'm whining or anything...but I really hate them!

Yes, hate is a strong word, but human beings are just... And I just feel like using the word 'hate' right now, so I'm going to go with it.

I hate how they all think they're oh, so much better than me, and maybe they are...but to ignore me, to treat me like I'm so freaking unimportant even if they're supposedly my friends, for some of them to treat me like trash...

Hey, maybe I am trash. Kudos to you for realizing it. But are you the mirror image of perfection? I didn't think so.

And though I may be garbage, a piece of rotten fruit or something even worse, though I may be human waste, there has to be something that I can do that you can't. So don't look so smug and wipe that stupid smirk off your face. Stop looking at me with disgust.

Do you hate me? Then I'll hate you, as well. You get what you give, and you give what you get.

So you know that imaginary dick that I don't have? Suck on it.

Damn, that felt good. :)
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Re: Get that thing off your chest... Now...

#5103 Post by Lesleigh63 » Tue Nov 22, 2016 2:47 am

mugenjohncel wrote:Ah... it's been a while since I visited this thread which I started and wow... how much it has grown... guess it's my turn to get "this" thing of my chest...

"POOF" (Disappears)
Hi Uncle Mugen. Nice to see you dropping by and that you got movement back in your hands and can draw again. Hair down to your waist - I would have loved to have seen that. (love long hair on guys).

Hang in there.
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Re: Get that thing off your chest... Now...

#5104 Post by Aviala » Tue Nov 22, 2016 10:14 am

I have hypermobile joints. Doesn't sound too bad, 1 in 10 have the same condition. It can actually be really helpful in sports (I wish it had that effect on me, maybe I would have been more popular in school!). But for me, it's causing wrist pains that can't be cured. I probably won't ever be able to work a 9 to 5 job, at least not in the game industry or any other thing that requires hands... And who would hire a part-timer for any proper position in a company. The only real option I have is becoming an entrepreneur so that I can control my working hours, which I'm actually interested in..... but I can't hadle a lot of pressure due to me probably having ADD. I don't have a diagnosis for ADD yet (sooon...!!) but there's something wrong with me and ADD fits the best (even though not perfectly).

SO, can't work a 9 to 5 job, and entrepreneurship will probably be bad for my mental health... It feels so unfair. I used to do crafts and art as a hobby and sometimes on a professional level, but my doctor tells me I shouldn't. It feels like everything I enjoy is being taken away from me.

I'll just have to live with my condition since it's genetical, and I think I can manage being an entrepreneur if people support me, but I just wanted to rant a bit :') I'm trying to move forward but sometimes I just feel sad and hopeless. I know there's always a way forward but sometimes it's really hard to see it. But that doesn't mean it doesn't exist.

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I'm feeling a little down :(

#5105 Post by Doodleshy » Mon Nov 28, 2016 4:19 pm

So I'm going to talk about some things that are very personal, if you don't like these kind of things you can leave now.
Hi, I'm Alex. I am a 17 year old male living in Milton, Florida. I've done terrible things. I don't want this to be a 'pity me' post, but it might start to sound like one. Let me start off with a few things that weigh on my mind before I get to the problem at hand.
I have a plethora of diagnoses pertaining to my mental health and stability. I know that people say that I shouldn't use them as a crutch, so I don't. But, at the same time, it makes me wonder who I am. There are certain things I do that are caused by these "conditions" I have. Some people don't understand that I'm not using these problems to get out of working, but I'm just aware of how these affect me. But, there are some things that I do not understand when I do them. Which brings me to the topic at hand.
I messed up really badly. I was on a team of people, I won't say who, that I liked very much. We were working on a game together, and I was hoping to branch out into some of the other projects that were going on. I regarded these people as friends, close friends. I looked forward to coming home and talking to them. But, I messed up.
One night, we were talking as we do. One of the team members asked me to help them on an essay. After receiving the details of said essay, I became angry. I'm not sure why, I just did. I started berating the person who wanted my help for not doing the essay correctly and not following instructions. I started hassling everyone in the group, spouting nonsense and insults. I was fuming for reasons I still don't understand.
After that was over, I went to cool my head and think. I thought about why I was so mad and why I had lashed out, but I couldn't find a reason. After I had calmed myself down, I became extremely sad. Depressed, even. It's kind of what I do when I get mad. I hate being mad. When I'm mad, I hurt people. Anyway, I became sad. I went back to the conversation, and nobody was talking to me. I tried messaging people and begging for responses, but got nothing. Common sense dictates that they would no longer want to speak to me because of what I had done, but common sense didn't apply at this point. I have one fear that is prominent in my actions. I'm afraid of being alone. So, when this happened, it felt like someone just shot me in the heart. I began bawling. I typed frantically, not worrying about punctuation or proper grammar. I just wanted someone to respond.
After what felt like hours to me, I got a response. The response was along the lines of 'we have deliberated and come to the conclusion that you shall be excluded from the team.' This felt like someone pulled my heart out and snuffed all life from within it. I snapped. Not in the way you expect, though. I didn't become angry. I became extremely elated. At least, that was the facade. I began promising to work hard and be the best I can be. It was too late. I knew this, but I refused to believe it. After a bit of frantic struggling, I was still shot down. At this point, I realized the hopelessness and began to beg. I begged and begged. Again, I was still in the same place. At that point I gave up. I acted like I was 'back to normal,' hiding my sadness and insecurities. My last word to them was "Goodbye."
After this incident, I have become quite distraught. I have lost almost all motivation to work on my project. I don't want to abandon it, but it's become something that reminds me of them when I see it. It makes my heart hurt. I don't have anyone else working with me on it except one sprite and CG artist in the Philippines who's almost always busy. This situation has made it so more of my insecurities come to light. The most prominent being that I tend to destroy every close relationship I have with people. I've become more distant towards family and friends. I'm afraid of losing them. I don't know what to do. It's becoming a struggle just to wake up in the morning.
I know this probably isn't the place to talk about these things, but I just needed to get things off my chest. You can just read this and leave, or you can reply or PM me if you want. I hope you all have better days than I've been having.

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Re: I'm feeling a little down :(

#5106 Post by Taranee » Mon Nov 28, 2016 5:01 pm

You said you've been diagnosed with mental disorders. Are you going to therapy or getting help with anger management? I think you should be. You could practise calming yourself down when you start to get angry.

You also said you have insecurities. Often people who lash out at others are very insecure. Do you know what causes your insecurities? What are you insecure about? Loneliness and insecurity can create a vicious circle in which you feel too insecure to make friends, which makes you lonely, which makes you even more insecure...

Have you been to any forums for people with the same diagnosis as yours? You might find people (and even new friends) who are very understanding of your condition, or you might get into even bigger fights with them. But I think looking for forums is worth a try.

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Re: I'm feeling a little down :(

#5107 Post by indoneko » Mon Nov 28, 2016 5:06 pm

Somehow you remind me of the heroine in anime "Air" (she has a mental condition that causing her to cry for no apparent reason when she started getting close with her friend). That's quite devastating. I don't know your condition yet, but I agree with Taranee's suggestion about seeking help/therapy and finding out the source of your insecurities.

I hope you'd find new friends who would understand your condition and accept you as you are.

PS :
Actually, uncle Mugen had already made a thread titled "Get that things off your chest now" where anyone can share his/her own situation instead of making a new thread.
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Re: I'm feeling a little down :(

#5108 Post by Taleweaver » Mon Nov 28, 2016 5:48 pm

indoneko wrote:PS :
Actually, uncle Mugen had already made a thread titled "Get that things off your chest now" where anyone can share his/her own situation instead of making a new thread.
Merged.
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Re: Get that thing off your chest... Now...

#5109 Post by Rinima » Wed Dec 14, 2016 5:46 pm

God I'm shattered.

Note to self, actually paying attention on education about mental health and nursing, is not particularly good for one's own mental health when their MH is slowly going down the toilet. I think it's time to go back to the doctors for some medication methinks.

Also, they cut a bit close to home today, we had to do a role play where a women went into A&E after overdosing on paracetamol, and I was chosen to be the patient in the role play. Didn't help that my first suicide attempt was by that exact means. Thanks university for that awkward situation.
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Re: Get that thing off your chest... Now...

#5110 Post by Shinoki » Sat Dec 17, 2016 4:34 pm

Urgh. Not to diss any Christians, but my parents are really getting on my back.

So, I have some Church friends. However, I'm not Christian and I hate the feeling of being pressured to accept the love of Christ or whatever. It's annoying, and I'm not bold enough to be like: "No, I seriously just don't believe in your magical voodoo about some Creator God that decided to kick his creations out of a garden, flood the Earth, and be a jerk to Israelites or whatever."

Anyhow, so it's like one of my Church friend's birthday. Since I can't go to her party tonight, I was like: I'll go to Church for once to give her a birthday present. It felt a bit mean to just tell my parents to give a friend a present. Like, hey, give the present to your friends yourself.

Thus, I tell my mom, and I'm like: "Just saying, I haven't suddenly converted or anything. I'm not all that interested, but I'm going to Church tomorrow so I can give a friend a present." Okay, so maybe doing so isn't good because I'm blasphemous or something?

Then, my mom just starts ranting to me about how I should believe. How I'll go to Hell or something. And I'm like: "I don't believe in it. It probably doesn't exist." I'm lowkey really bad at arguing, and I rather avoid conflict that cause it. But, mother dear naturally has to keep arguing with me.

So, I bring up science. Shot down by le scientist. I was just like doing experiments is better than observational studies. And she's like no! I'm like: well, the whole Bible is just a bunch of observations, so you can't prove it. Then, she goes all Schrodinger's cat on me. And then I'm like: "The cat could be dead or alive, but it's probably gonna die if you don't feed it and open the box. Thus, I don't believe in the Bible."

The argument goes on forever. It's really annoying, and I just wanted to get back to practicing piano since... I had just walked into the kitchen to grab a snack and decided to tell my mom. She gets all mad at me and acts hurt. And I'm just like: "...I didn't even want to argue in the first place. You could have just been like: Ok. And I would have walked away back to my piano, but nope. Gotta start arguments."

It annoys me so much. Arghh.

More reasons why I can't tell my mom that I'm really gay. Well, bi, but 90% gay. If I did, she'd probably go pick a fight with me or something.

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Re: Get that thing off your chest... Now...

#5111 Post by Catlip Candy » Sun Dec 18, 2016 1:45 am

Getting this thing outta my chest now u.u

It sucks when someone you love wants you to change your appearance u.u I'm kinda skinny, no boobs *cries*.. no nice butt *cries*.. no nothing u.u

What is it with big boobs and big butts anyways >.>

*cries forever

*will try to move on

u.u

(a rather shallow rant)
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Re: Get that thing off your chest... Now...

#5112 Post by Sonomi » Sun Dec 18, 2016 10:58 am

@Shinoki

Empathy and the Golden Rule are the only standards I hold myself to. This came up some time ago with one of my friends. I do not remember how the conversation arose, but I told her that while I do believe in God I do not feel comfortable stating any religion in particular. She (Catholic) basically explained that it was irrational to have such beliefs without being Catholic/Christian: from her perspective, there was no line between religion and atheism. That was quite an interesting ultimatum.

In the end, we did listen to each other and life went onward. ^^; I understood that we had different upbringings so it was easier to grasp why she held her opinions of the matter. She was raised as a Catholic who went to church three days each week. I was raised with "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you" and that was the extent of what my parents expected of me. Eventually, I developed a personal notion that it was okay to not classify myself as one thing or another as long as I knew what my beliefs were.

When it comes to handling sensitive topics like these, I feel it is best to be as receptive as possible to the views of the person you are speaking with to avoid putting them on a defensive (I think that is the right term). A little understanding goes a long way--not that it always works well...not in the least, I must confess.

@Fake Existence

I am not quite sure why that is popular either, but it will be okay if you try to be happy with yourself. You can probably take any advice I share on the matter with a grain of salt though, because I really struggle with self-esteem. Positive reinforcement is still nice. :)
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Re: Get that thing off your chest... Now...

#5113 Post by kisa » Mon Dec 19, 2016 3:17 pm

Okay so... -puts on a drama queen cap on top of an existing drama queen cap-

I'm not formally diagnosed with anxiety or depression or anything. But, I know I have them by the symptoms I have displayed many times over...

So, when a very lovely friend of mine went "Hey, Kisa. I'm gonna force you to make a new commissions page because your old one is old and not good for marketing so Imma help" I went "Okay, it's probably not gonna work though."
Much to my friend's credit, they still went through with it and now I have a cute little commissions page with a few examples.

A day passed, two of my friends posted supportive comments on the thread and I tried to stay cheerful.
Another day and still nothing and my depression and anxiety are collaborating to tear me apart.
154 views on each and every example drawing in my commissions page and not even a "I would but I'm broke"
... Anyways, that's all I wanted to get off my impatient anxious drama queen chest.

Peace out
I'm offering commissions!
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Re: Get that thing off your chest... Now...

#5114 Post by Rinima » Fri Dec 30, 2016 1:31 pm

Reference image: http://orig11.deviantart.net/f05d/f/201 ... atjvzd.jpg

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Re: Get that thing off your chest... Now...

#5115 Post by Imperf3kt » Sat Dec 31, 2016 3:49 am

I've come back to renpy after several months of not using it, and... I just can't adapt to the new gui.
It's like someone took the "no need to be a programmer" out of renpy and replaced it with "you must know C++ to succeed at this."

It's somewhat disheartening.
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pro·gram·mer (noun) An organism capable of converting caffeine into code.

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