Get that thing off your chest... Now...

[noeinan]

Warning for mentioning some dark stuff, including violence against animals and sexual violence.

Recently have been attending therapy sessions, and was diagnosed with PTSD. The method we're using to help with this includes talking in very great detail about certain traumatic events of my life (an animal being tortured in front of me, being raped, etc.) The idea is, I learn to talk about the incidents while separating the feelings I have about them, and if I do that then I will not be as impacted in my daily life.

The only problem with this is that my subconscious apparently deals with this stress in ways that immediately make my life very difficult. I have recently started having panic attacks in crowded places (a problem I haven't had in over 6 years), I have been having horrible night terrors which launch me into flashbacks, shaking, and generally not being okay for the whole rest of the day.

This, combined with my chronic illness, means I have missed a a good deal of work. My job is a part time job, and the reason I have it is because they have a very flexible schedule in that regard. But I can't help but feel horrible about myself-- last year when I worked there (in a different position) I was literally the best worker in my group. I got awards for my great sense of professionalism, I was put in a position to train and manage new employees, and my boss (different boss than now) gifted me his legacy screwdriver that his mentor gave him.

Missing work so much, I feel like I'm letting all of that down, and letting myself down. At the same time, I feel sick and in pain almost all the time-- and it's hard to keep my spirits up when I'm constantly having very graphic/emotional night terrors (ex. my rapist torturing me with an box-cutter-- didn't actually happen, but still horrible to experience in a dream.)

[MaiMai]

I hope that continued therapy sessions can help you daikiraikimi. You don't deserve to be in such a dark place right now and I hope you get support from people you trust in your life as well.

[noeinan]

Thanks, MaiMai. I'm very lucky to have people who care about me, and who are helping me work through this. It's just hard when it's not something that will just get better, and when it's been going on for years it causes a lot of stress and pressure on them as well. It would be easier if it was a cold or flu that would just go away in a few days and not come back, haha. But still chugging along, as one of my friends would say "inch towards daylight."

[AoyamaReika]

The last thing I wanted to see today was one of my artists' art reposted in this Facebook page without credits, and without information about the art whatsoever. My artist made that art to promote our project and now it has been reposted without credits. I have messaged the page behind it and they are being pretty stubborn about it. Some of my members and I commented on the photo itself, letting people know what the art was intended to be for. Unfortunately, the page itself took our comments down. Right now, we have reported the photo to Facebook and are hoping for a positive action.

[fleet]

The last thing I wanted to see today was one of my artists' art reposted in this Facebook page without credits, and without information about the art whatsoever. My artist made that art to promote our project and now it has been reposted without credits. I have messaged the page behind it and they are being pretty stubborn about it. Some of my members and I commented on the photo itself, letting people know what the art was intended to be for. Unfortunately, the page itself took our comments down. Right now, we have reported the photo to Facebook and are hoping for a positive action.

Notify the internet service provider, and tell them you issued a take down notice take the web site owners ignored.

[SusanTheCat]

I was diagnosed last week with breast cancer two weeks ago. They had found the cancer in a lump in my shoulder.

They did another biopsy last week to see if they could find the primary site. Still no results yet.



Susan

[pocoscon]

I was diagnosed last week with breast cancer two weeks ago. They had found the cancer in a lump in my shoulder.

They did another biopsy last week to see if they could find the primary site. Still no results yet.



Susan

I'm so sorry about that . My prayers are with you. Please take it easy during this tough time

[MaiMai]

I've had my Wacom Intuos for about a month... and now I want the Huion Pro. Curse me and my unnecessary pining for unnecessary tools! (But those 2048 levels of pressure for only a fraction of the price TAT)

[Rossfellow]

I just lost three hours of photoshop work. There is a harsh lesson to be learned here.

[xavimat]

I was diagnosed last week with breast cancer two weeks ago. They had found the cancer in a lump in my shoulder.

They did another biopsy last week to see if they could find the primary site. Still no results yet.



Susan

Also my prayers are with you. I'm so sorry.

[curry nochi rice]

I was diagnosed last week with breast cancer two weeks ago. They had found the cancer in a lump in my shoulder.

They did another biopsy last week to see if they could find the primary site. Still no results yet.



Susan

I hope you will be able to push past that challenge.

...
In an extraordinary stroke of bad luck, I will be going to my country's capital this month. I don't know but I feel rather safer in this backwater hometown of mine than in the capital. Heck ever since my last visit I've been despising the idea of ever visiting again.

I hope I won't be offline for a whole week. That's too big chunk of time taken off production. Not to mention it's smacked right at the enrollment for second semester.

But being offline means I can work on things like script and more stat algorithms. Welp, I'll probably bring my notebooks, and calculator along with me.

Ughhhh I really don't want to go.

[try10]

Same for me. I live in a small town and I have to go to the capital every week because of some classes. Even If in my town is hard to find a good job and stuff, I feel way safer there... I have a few weeks left and I'll Be free. It doesn't help that I'm not good with crowded places and people...

[MaiMai]

Update: Yeah, the Huion was a disappointment, the drivers are confusing and despite the 2048 levels of pressure, either I'm too used to working half of that or I honestly did not like the feel of the pen. Pressure/pen sensitivity didn't even work for Manga Studio 5 or Photoshop CS6.

Only good thing out of this is that I can return it and get refunded.

[Morhighan]

Update: Yeah, the Huion was a disappointment, the drivers are confusing and despite the 2048 levels of pressure, either I'm too used to working half of that or I honestly did not like the feel of the pen. Pressure/pen sensitivity didn't even work for Manga Studio 5 or Photoshop CS6.

Only good thing out of this is that I can return it and get refunded.

That's good to know about the Huion. I'm shopping around and I have my eye on one of the MonoPrice tablets, which has the screen directly on the tablet, but I also need the money for other stuff.
I'm glad you can refund it.

----

In other news, I downgraded my computer to Windows 7, which has been great, but typing on it is really weird now because my touch pad keeps acting annoying.

[Caveat Lector]

Seems like the problems on this page are especially bad. I hope you all find some shred of happiness.

Sometimes, I want to reply directly to someone's problem, but I don't know what to say and don't want it to come off as insensitive by accident, so I end up saying nothing.