Thanks for your response. I really like how you picked some of the only lines that I didn't personally write. Those lines were written by the other writers. I guess I have to check over everything, but since I'm not great at english either (I'm from Hong Kong) I might have to ask my english teacher.Tag- wrote:Okay, I finished playing it, and from what I can see, there's nothing wrong with the art (I like Zoe's design best, hehe). I really like your art, it's so cute and clean . I'm a bit confused about their clothes, (for example, why is Evelyn wearing normal clothes when they're going to school?) or will this issue be addressed when you've drawn more?Haha, I found it funny when Sarah overreacted so much at Evelyn falling on her Looks like she has a bit of a brother complex...The main problem I'm seeing at the moment is your script. There are a few punctuation mistakes and typos, but more noticeable are your grammar mistakes, you might want an editor to look over them. At the moment they make it slightly awkward to read.
Some examples are:"Sarah, your sister comes into the room." should be: "Your sister, Sarah, comes into the room."A little tip: It is advisable to only use one "!" or "?" in your writing, it just makes your writing look neater and nicer to read.
"Besides me actually being smart..." could be: "Besides the fact that I am actually smart..."
"Well, since you're so smart then, why don't you show us the way you're so sure of?" should be: "Well, since you're so smart, why don't you show us the way that you seem to be so sure of?"
"Let's go Sarah?" - If you're asking a question, it should be, "Shall we go, Sarah?" If not, it's simply, "Let's go, Sarah."
Okay I'm done.
agfjkadaj I am so, so sorry if I appear to be too harsh or mean >< It wasn't my intention at all D:
Should I draw additional clothes for different situations? I feel like I should, but my lazy side is screaming at me. I think I will, so expect different clothes in later versions of the game.