Hotel Geist (GxB Ghost Story Otome)

[FrozenApple66]

DELETED BECAUSE I MADE A REAL WIP THREAD!!

http://lemmasoft.renai.us/forums/viewto ... 43&t=23785

[silverpikachu99]

This looks adorable! Marcus is my favourite so far<3 Good luck finishing this!

[Googaboga]

WooOoo I love stories with ghosts and haunted places. The synopsis sounds interesting. It is very rare for an otome heroine to have dated before much less been in a relationship right before the start of the game. Anyways good luck :].

To post images you can right click the image and select "copy image location" and then paste that between the the image brackets. There is a button to get image brackets. It is under the spot where you post the title of the thread but above where you actually type your post.

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[img]http://lemmasoft.renai.us/forums/download/file.php?id=22884&mode=view[/img]

[FrozenApple66]

Thanks so much for your input guys~! I hope to have another sprite done by tonight! I'll also upload a CG or two... depending on how much work I get done.

[Kyra10]

Wow~
A ghost story otome?
That is so awesome!

[FrozenApple66]

The different Menu images I am debating using...

[inujuju]

Story: The story sounds interesting overall. As already stated its nice to see an otome game with an "experienced" player character. I would advise that you be careful on how you balance the overall plot and the romantic elements though. I've seen many excellent plot ideas get pushed aside for romance and end up losing their potential and unique feel.

Characters: You have a nice range of characters for the small setting. I especially like Robby's and Marcus' design. Its not often you see larger people or different skin colour in these kind of games! The characters sound like they have unique personality but be careful of being pulled into stereo-types because of their difference from each other.

Backgrounds: I note that you state that you got them from google. If this is still the case I would highly suggest going back to them, finding the original website that displayed the image and make sure you're allowed to use it. Even if its a picture of some random street it might be someone's photo that they don't want others to use. Never trust google for holding images that you can use!

Endings: Nice number of endings there. Hopefully that was planned or that was an awesome coincidence! Be careful though. I'm not sure if this is your first VN but endings can be quite taxing on the writer because you have to make them all equal in importance and detail to prevent a biased, favored character from appearing.

Title Screen: I would suggest to go with the second one but change the writing so it is more easy to read. Also it appears that the"h" in hotel is under case so just be careful of that.

I will definitely drop by your recruitment thread (heading there now) to check it out! Best of luck!

[Googaboga]

I also prefer the second title screen. But it's up to you :].

I love that little chibi CG. It is really adorable.

[FrozenApple66]

@Everyone Please check my credits section as I have handed over the reigns for art to Meg`! This lovely woman (Sorry Meg I am assuming you are a woman) has agreed to do the art for the game (most of it)! Because of this I have added a profile picture for Ellie in her style.

ALSO: please check out my recruitment thread as I have a few more open spots for character-path specific editing. ( *Laurent's path is the least completed, you might be waiting a while for him.*)

AND hopefully by the end of October I will have a proper WIP thread made. (It all depends on what my artist and editors feel comfortable with.)

@inujuju

Thank you so much for your wonderful feedback~! <3 It makes me happy for people say things that make me think (the character stereotypes comment). I don't think that the backgrounds will be a problem as I have an artist. If she can't do the backgrounds I will find proper images that are free for use. As for the plot, I think the problem might actually be that I will focus too much on the ghosts to develop a proper 'romance'... haha... Oh dear... But I will do my best to keep things balanced!

@Googaboga
The artist changed so the menu will change as well. And, awwww, thanks so much~ I'm quite proud of it if I may say so... ^^'

[FrozenApple66]

ALL of my recruitment spots are filled. Thank you so much for all of the support and I'll try to post the real WIP today.