Metadream ComPlex - finally finished and polished

[neowired]

Well guys, that's it, I finished the thing once more. I want to sell it but I don't really see any way how to do it. And I haven't made a demo yet (but yes the game is finished and polished :3).
I rewrote it, added content, multiple choices and 7 endings (and another character as well), some music and oh, lots of eye candy. It looks pretty cool now.
Also, i remade the form, overall. Changed it from just "novel" form into a mix of novel and "normal"

What started inspired by Saya no uta, but very unlike it. Certanly not so dark and bloody, though slightly mysterious. Oh, and no eating human flesh ; p

And what is this game about?
It's an escapist fantasy about loosing touch with reality and finding love ; p

Really hard to say how long this thing is right now, but I think about 1-2 hours perhaps, maybe more (not sure how good the replay value is, but the thing has events tied up like a pretzel, and was a real bitch when I was checking it for errors)

And it's the first time I'm actually posting some screenshots to show off a bit XD damn I deserve it.



Now with a short demo
Still not sure how to sell the thing, I'm considering dlsite, but If someone is interested and wants to bother with paypal, I'm up for sending it individually. The price I'm thinking about is 10$

Also, I linked the game to my deviantart
http://neowired.deviantart.com/art/Meta ... -152750657
My questions is if this forum Is capable of me linking this file all over the net, or if I should host it somewhere like mediafire (I wouldn't want to overload the forum by any unlikely chance, even as unlikely as that is ; p)

[JQuartz]

Hopefully it'll work

Hopefully you don't mean it can't work cause that will totally waste the time I spent downloading this thing.

[neowired]

I mean It worked on my computer but I don't know if it will work on someone else computer because noone other then me checked if it works. It should work, theoretically.

[Hime]

It works perfectly, so no worries!

Saya no Uta inspired? That's great... Congratulations on entering the VN scene, neowired. ^^

I played the game, and I liked it. Despite the adultish and sad aspects, in general the game had a cute feel to it, which both the graphics and music complemented well. The creature seemed sympathetic, although creepy at times, and I absolutely loved the dreamlike scenes, particularly the first one. They were well executed and had a great atmosphere. Are the musics of this game original? They sound new to me and fit in so well that they at least seem as if they were made for it...

Then off to the little critique I have. The end was rather sudden, but then again, if it had been more prolonged the game might have lost some of its "short and sweet" aspect, so it's a question of taste I guess. Another was that the first piece of music played sound as if two songs were playing at the same time... It could be just the way it was supposed to be, though, but it distracted me a bit.

Also, a little nitpicking that caught my eye and ended up bothering me quite a bit: the remark of "getting anorexic" when she forces herself to eat the sandwich. Anorexia is a mental disease, a very serious and sad one at that, and no way synonymous to becoming thin... If you leave the remark the way it is, it may bother some people, especially those who have experienced it themselves or seen others go through it. Not eating a sandwich rarely makes your mind sick.

But I have to say, the mushroom relevation near the end was surprising and had charm to it, I wouldn't have thought that the game would actually be describing someone's experiences when drugged. A very nice, original touch, as was how her accident was viewed from another point.

Well done! Also, it seems you made your first piece rather quickly, which I find admirable. I hope we'll be seeing more VNs from you. ^^

[JQuartz]

I played it already. The first time I played it I thought the Hero's actions was kind of gay then in the end only I realize that it wasn't a Hero but a Heroine. I played again and this time it felt a bit ero...I kind of suspected he was a she though since his/her actions was kind of gay. The story was okay. But I didn't like sad stuff so probably I gave less marks for it than it supposed to get. 1 thing I very mini slightly dislike was sometimes when the scene changed and the screen blacks out, the text don't get erased and I have to look for the new sentence which is added. Just very mini slightly dislike.

[Enerccio]

Hopefully it'll work

Hopefully you don't mean it can't work cause that will totally waste the time I spent downloading this thing.

Now that's a HUUUUUUUGGGGEEEEEEEEE problem Mr. DialUp. Sheesh.

[Hime]

I played it already. The first time I played it I thought the Hero's actions was kind of gay then in the end only I realize that it wasn't a Hero but a Heroine.

The story it about a girl and a weird creature

So you assumed the protagonist was the weird creature, and the creature was a girl, or what? o_O

[neowired]

It works perfectly, so no worries!

Saya no Uta inspired? That's great... Congratulations on entering the VN scene, neowired. ^^

I played the game, and I liked it.

Yes, I made the music with an electric keyboard/piano, adding some elements with audacity, thinking what I need do make the atmosphere right.
The first song probably seems bad because it's most likely is bad ; p
I'm not a music artist at all, in fact that's the first time I tried composing any music. I'm more of a graphic artist really, although I went a bit lazy on the graphic.
Which means I'm very happy that the music seems as good as it seems ^_^

Thanks for pointing out all the problems, I'll keep them in mind when I'll be reworking the game, although I'm not sure when I'll be doing it.

[Hime]

I'm not a music artist at all, in fact that's the first time I tried composing any music. I'm more of a graphic artist really, although I went a bit lazy on the graphic.
Which means I'm very happy that the music seems as good as it seems ^_^

Woah, seriously?! O_O To think you could do that well and you're a first timer on top of it... Really impressive!

[Enerccio]

Congratulations on finishing. I finished it as well.
Now for some thoughts.

The Good:

I liked the story, it was kinda erotic in a way and nice subversion of saya (where saya is girl but blob, when here it's just a blob.). Nice job on music. The bcg were nice and simple, I kinda liked them.

The Bad:

You should use some sort of ctc for page/line distinction. Also, you should use far more paragraphs than you used.
Thickness of nvl window should be also bigger... I sometimes could hardly read text.

The Ugly:

Sprites of girls were not so great. At all...

Anyways, good luck on your next projects!

[IceD]

Hello there Neowired! It seems we are in the same boat, I mean country

I play Dream Wish and I have to admit it looks preety neat, especially with all the stuff done manually. Even if it's not the biggest of quality (which isn't a problem, I've seen a lot of crap getting more attenion), it's really suprising you've made everything. The art is simple but somehow it made me fell happy, propably because of those wivid colors in those dreamy scenes. The music is a bit shakey but fits the background perfectly. I think it's one of the strongest points. Are you really new to the music composing? It seems you could compose nicely, just master little more theory and practice a lot

The story is obviously somewhat related to the Song of Saya, but in overal you're a good writer and I don't mind it. The story isn't boring or hard to understand and your tend to create nice descriptions. It's a big plus, both for the inspiration and your writing

The only thing that dissapointed me was the main menu. Although the background CG wasn't bad, you could at least grasp a little more of renpy coding and create something better. The distorted laugh isn't good either, especially as the backgorund sound for the menu. It just doesn't fit. To conclude things, it seems you have a good grasp for VN's. Keep up the good work and I hope your next work will be as good (or even better) as Dream Wish!

Also, join us on IRC. We've got our own channel


(Tak nawiasem mówiąc, miło mi widzieć rodaka na zagranicznym forum poruszającym tak mało u nas znaną tematykę Gratuluję dobrej roboty i życzę powodzenia w przyszłych projektach!)

[Enerccio]

(Tak nawiasem mówiąc, miło mi widzieć rodaka na zagranicznym forum poruszającym tak mało u nas znaną tematykę Gratuluję dobrej roboty i życzę powodzenia w przyszłych projektach!)

How many of Poland people are here? I wonder if the count is larger than slovakian people

[IceD]

It seems I and Neowired will be the only active polish users here, although there may be some more people, lurking within the forum

Don't go offtopic

[JQuartz]

So you assumed the protagonist was the weird creature, and the creature was a girl, or what? o_O

Oops, I didn't realize the author already mentioned that this game is about a girl and a creature. The moment I saw 10mb I downloaded it instead of finish reading to the synopsis part. So I didn't know it the main character was a she. So when I reached the part

where the main character was playing with the tentacles,

I felt like, "Ooh, that's totally gay." If I had read all the way to the end of the first post, this wouldn't have happened. Eh, just in case anyone was offended by the usage of the gay word, I'm sorry. I'm not anti-homo.

[mugenjohncel]

[quote="JQuartz"]

where the main character was playing with the tentacles,[/

quote]
Tentacles!? ... DOWNLOADING!!!

"POOF" (Will be back)