Doppelganger (GXB,mystery,horror)+demo [on hold]

[azureXtwilight]

Thank you for the feedback! I am currently reaching 15 minutes in-game-reading and maybe will add a little bit more.
Anyway, I am focusing to this and will release a demo next month.
Please lower the sound volume if you don't want to get shocked.

[Starling]

Omg I was only half interested and then I watched the clip and now I'm hooked. I love mystery stories like this. And though of course there will be some editting to the writing, the pacing for it so far is just perfect.

And so many boys I do not know whom I will chooooose

[Riviera]

But... I didn't give very good feedback. *guilllt*

Okay, now for actual good feedback! *puts review cap on, which oddly enough looks like a beret with a cupcake on top and a big feather in it*

*cough*

Lucia: I'd almost say typical meganekko, but for the potential for change. Plus I get this feeling from her smiling sprite that she's got a few shades of nice girl just waiting to come out. I love the detailing on her casual clothing, and would personally love that sweater in my own closet.

Lee: Seems like a generous, very private person. It almost makes me think that his knowing as much as he does is the reason he is so generous. Maybe he's got dirt on people and feels bad for them? "That ends when you enter his path."? So, your advantage ends or things get more complicated? Sounds promising, either way. I usually do not like megane characters unless they deviate from the typical megane characteristics like Lee does. "Ice cold people who only warm up after a few years hours of game time" tend not to be my cup of tea. This makes me sad because I like the glasses look. Wow, Lee got a big write-up AND a rant!

Yuri: Ahhh, the bad boy. I actually wonder if him hanging around the murder scene is a red herring. If he'll be the misunderstood heart of gold character. These types can be fun to win over, I admit. Sorry, I'm far too genre savvy and jaded. I'm hoping for a secret sweet side we can bring out, but at the same time I'm also hoping for genuine bad boy characters. Ones that actually are rebels and aren't secret Cancers. I'm a cancer, I know all about that... haha. (For those not big on horoscopes, Cancers tend to be "hard shells with soft interiors" and sometimes tsunderes.)

Clifford: I'm getting a "possible psychic" vibe from him. Maybe because of his knowing so much and the weird feeling Lucia got? The emphasis on mysterious seems to point that way too. Suicidal, eh? I'm really curious as to how that'll play out in his route.. if that will be the conflict we overcome as opposed to the mystery, or if it'll just show in how he talks. It'd set up a good exposition scene for us to get backstory on him.

Blake: As someone who wears headphones all the time as well, I salute you, Blake. Getting names wrong can be such a cute thing in games and is not used often, so it's nice to see it here. Sleeping in class can be funny, too. Unless it happens every day, then you'll want to bean him with something close at hand, haha. Especially if he gets good grades despite that. I can definitely see why he and Lucia don't get along. "Oh my god, he's such a slacker, a lay-about, a do-nothing.. every time he falls asleep in class I just want to beat him over the head with my history book!!" Well, unless she's not that violent!

Raphael: Nice on the outside? So it's a facade he's putting up? Maybe to help further his basketball career? Can I keep up asking questions without making any real statements? I'm guessing he's not as genuinely nice anymore because the injury is/will be affecting his dream. It's pretty hard to lose a dream, or even feel that you've got a pretty good chance at losing it. With the team he's got, well, that just exacerbates it. Usually I'd assume as the MC our "job" would be to help him achieve his dream, but unless Lucia suddenly decides to take up coaching (and doesn't suck at it), I'm not sure how we'd help him. Other than keep him alive, of course. This could be really interesting.

Ignatius: I'm wondering if he'll play the part of TokiMemo's shonen next door (or down the hall)? It'd be pretty interesting, that's for sure. There aren't enough characters who give the MC grief about their dating life. "Onee-san, make sure you get a date for the prom~ Don't sit at home in your sweats and eat ice cream~" *infuriated yelling by onee-san here* "Ahhh~ I already had four girls ask me and you're so much older~ Onee-san, you need to be more like me~"

Jun: I've never seen Jun used as a girl's name, this kind of threw me off! She sounds like a nice girl, a real older sister type. Hopefully the disaster mentioned isn't HORRIBLE DEATH.

Arthur: Good, someone will be here to help us not be left out of the loop. Or forget information we'd gathered after we've wandered off to attend to real life. At least I think he'll do that. Could he do that? That'd be really nice. Some detective games don't keep important information in a note system nearby, and it always messes me up when I have to stop the game for a while.

Anastasia, et all.: Wow, makes me think that the murderer could be "protecting" Lucia? This could be really interesting!! Secret stalker is evolving! Secret stalker has become Secret Bodyguard of Death! ....okay, kill me now. NO! NOT REALLY! *murder'd*

???: First instinct is to say "THE KILLER!!!1" but that seems far too obvious. But it could be made obvious to throw us all off. I'm so conflicted.

Rico: OOOOOOOOH, ghost appearance! Either that or his death was faked. Or he managed to get away and everyone just thinks he's dead. Either way, it's rather nifty.

[azureXtwilight]

If someone would like to be an editor I will be very glad. I think I've occupied Chel too much with Fantasia scripts XD

[maypaymusic]

I wouldn't mind being an editor it would be good

[Julie]

I also don't mind helping with the editing. I have a lot of free time and this seems like a very nice story. ^^

[azureXtwilight]

@maypaymusic and Julie : Can I get a sample of your writing style then?

@ Riviera :

Thanks for the long review! Let's see

Lucia: I'd almost say typical meganekko, but for the potential for change. Plus I get this feeling from her smiling sprite that she's got a few shades of nice girl just waiting to come out. I love the detailing on her casual clothing, and would personally love that sweater in my own closet.

Lucia is not the type of "nice" and "justice" type of heroine, she is just a teenage girl with worries and hatred, and also she is quite unstable (like most teenage girls)

Lee: Seems like a generous, very private person. It almost makes me think that his knowing as much as he does is the reason he is so generous. Maybe he's got dirt on people and feels bad for them? "That ends when you enter his path."? So, your advantage ends or things get more complicated? Sounds promising, either way. I usually do not like megane characters unless they deviate from the typical megane characteristics like Lee does. "Ice cold people who only warm up after a few years hours of game time" tend not to be my cup of tea. This makes me sad because I like the glasses look. Wow, Lee got a big write-up AND a rant!

I mean that Lee is not as "perfect" as what Lucia sees him, and him as a megane is quite a friendly megane (and his crush at Lucia will never change, so he might still interfere in other guy's path

Sadly, he is not the "canon" in my mind.

~ I am glad you like him!

Lee is the moost mysterious because he has a

yandere vibe >D

Yuri : Ahhh, the bad boy. I actually wonder if him hanging around the murder scene is a red herring. If he'll be the misunderstood heart of gold character. These types can be fun to win over, I admit. Sorry, I'm far too genre savvy and jaded. I'm hoping for a secret sweet side we can bring out, but at the same time I'm also hoping for genuine bad boy characters. Ones that actually are rebels and aren't secret Cancers. I'm a cancer, I know all about that... haha. (For those not big on horoscopes, Cancers tend to be "hard shells with soft interiors" and sometimes tsunderes.)

Nope, he is a real jerk. But he likes

people who wants to steer him the right way because in his mind that is equal to care XD

. So yes, here goes our tsundere, except that he is tsun almost all the times. Also, the "big brawny, all in for the punch" type too

Also, he has a connection to the problem like all people in the game~

Clifford: I'm getting a "possible psychic" vibe from him. Maybe because of his knowing so much and the weird feeling Lucia got? The emphasis on mysterious seems to point that way too. Suicidal, eh? I'm really curious as to how that'll play out in his route.. if that will be the conflict we overcome as opposed to the mystery, or if it'll just show in how he talks. It'd set up a good exposition scene for us to get backstory on him.

Clifford is an ordinary yet unordinary man, but he is not a physic because that role is taken over by someone else >D
His reactions to everything (so cool towards the murders) makes Lucia thinks he is insane~

Blake: As someone who wears headphones all the time as well, I salute you, Blake. Getting names wrong can be such a cute thing in games and is not used often, so it's nice to see it here. Sleeping in class can be funny, too. Unless it happens every day, then you'll want to bean him with something close at hand, haha. Especially if he gets good grades despite that. I can definitely see why he and Lucia don't get along. "Oh my god, he's such a slacker, a lay-about, a do-nothing.. every time he falls asleep in class I just want to beat him over the head with my history book!!" Well, unless she's not that violent!

Called Lucia "Luke" and Lee "Leah"
And you portrayed him very well, I tend to make Blake's route the lightest of them all and less dark.

Raphael: Nice on the outside? So it's a facade he's putting up? Maybe to help further his basketball career? Can I keep up asking questions without making any real statements? I'm guessing he's not as genuinely nice anymore because the injury is/will be affecting his dream. It's pretty hard to lose a dream, or even feel that you've got a pretty good chance at losing it. With the team he's got, well, that just exacerbates it. Usually I'd assume as the MC our "job" would be to help him achieve his dream, but unless Lucia suddenly decides to take up coaching (and doesn't suck at it), I'm not sure how we'd help him. Other than keep him alive, of course. This could be really interesting.

Hmm, Ralph is a nice person, but the injury really turns him upside down. And to think that this obtainable guy will

actually die before half of the game...

Ignatius: I'm wondering if he'll play the part of TokiMemo's shonen next door (or down the hall)? It'd be pretty interesting, that's for sure. There aren't enough characters who give the MC grief about their dating life. "Onee-san, make sure you get a date for the prom~ Don't sit at home in your sweats and eat ice cream~" *infuriated yelling by onee-san here* "Ahhh~ I already had four girls ask me and you're so much older~ Onee-san, you need to be more like me~"

The junior, it is XD
But since

Ignatius also meets the same "fate" as Ralph and this time Lucia is powerless against it, so don't bother going for him.

Jun: I've never seen Jun used as a girl's name, this kind of threw me off! She sounds like a nice girl, a real older sister type. Hopefully the disaster mentioned isn't HORRIBLE DEATH."

Jun is boyish~ And she actually hates boys
But that doesn't mean I have a GXG path, absolutely not.

Jun will survive, but her future depends on Lucia, her best friend...

Arthur: Good, someone will be here to help us not be left out of the loop. Or forget information we'd gathered after we've wandered off to attend to real life. At least I think he'll do that. Could he do that? That'd be really nice. Some detective games don't keep important information in a note system nearby, and it always messes me up when I have to stop the game for a while.

Hmm, Arthur is important because he has a wide connection and needed for some key clues. Also, I tend to make a feature that writes off every scene on the game that is easy to click (a "diary" feature on the screen) and read if you kind of forget.

Anastasia, et all.: Wow, makes me think that the murderer could be "protecting" Lucia? This could be really interesting!! Secret stalker is evolving! Secret stalker has become Secret Bodyguard of Death! ....okay, kill me now. NO! NOT REALLY! *murder'd*

They are not dead, but the condition they are in makes them don't want to live either

???: First instinct is to say "THE KILLER!!!1" but that seems far too obvious. But it could be made obvious to throw us all off. I'm so conflicted.

MWAHAHAHAHA

Rico: OOOOOOOOH, ghost appearance! Either that or his death was faked. Or he managed to get away and everyone just thinks he's dead. Either way, it's rather nifty.

Hehehehe

[maypaymusic]

uhh what do you mean by writing style? like a story or something? xD sorry I'm still new to this xD

[azureXtwilight]

maypaymusic: Yes

I updated first page again, adding this screenshot :3

[ziaziany]

Whoa, a lot of character here but I found each of them has his own interesting point.
The story also very interesting for me , kinda want to see what's going to happen XD

[azureXtwilight]

@Zia : Thank you for the comment!
@Julie : I am wondering whether you are familiar with/have renpy or not so when I send you the script I know in what format

And I have updated Cliff~ The oldest dateable so far \(^_^)/

[Snowflower]

I am kind of obsessed with Yuri and Clifford <3
GYAHHH
& the demo was absolutely thrilling.
Hope the full version will be posted very soon

[azureXtwilight]

I haven't released a demo yet XD
Maybe february if all goes well...

[Snowflower]

I haven't released a demo yet XD
Maybe february if all goes well...

Ah, I meant the trailer.
My B

[Lumen_Astrum]

COOL~
I'm really falling in love with Clifford~
NYAHAHAHAHAHAHA~ XDDD

I hope you finish this! ^o^