here are the things I think are excessive and a little later I'll get to why:Megumi wrote: I grinned, my white teeth gleaming. She had grasped one of the discarded swords and had stared right into my eyes. Her aquamarine eyes sparkled with determination. <i>She</i> wanted to take me down.
One. white teeth gleaming
Two. the third sentence, yes all of it
okay, now why are these excessive? Because the art, which is just as much of a visual novel as the words, (though perhaps more then the sounds) should convey this information.
Other then that the only thing you really need is a proof reader and almost everyone needs one of those. Make Your project what ever length, and do whatever you like.
On a different note I'd be happy to proofread for you, or offer any other sort of assistance, save art or music generation since I suck at both of those.
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