Ruins and Heaven (GxB VN - WIP)

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Aozora210
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Ruins and Heaven (GxB VN - WIP)

#1 Post by Aozora210 » Mon Dec 20, 2010 5:52 pm

Ruins and Heaven
GxB visual novel

Genre: Fantasy, romance (of course)
Rating: 15+

This is a world where everything simply go by orders.
Where every creatures mixes and living in many places.
This is a world where everything simply always developed.
There is no stop for an ever growing land or sea.

The world is always expanding beyond the everlasting darkness.
'Rulers' born and always creating a new place for the inhabitants of this world.
Some, however, are not as kind as that.

Events happens, and they may change. Love can be born yet also hatred.
It is a feeling that can drive humanity to live, or to die.
This is a story that revolves around it...
The hatred and the love, the ruins and the heaven...


I. Summary:
Tel’Aria or simply Aria, is a deity or a ‘master of the land’ who has been guarding the land by the same name (in which she is called after) for over a thousand years. She lives in solitude within ruins in the middle of the land of Tel’Aria, which resembles heaven yet feared by many people for a 'curse' spreading through the land, and because for an incident that happened many years ago. The deity has hated humans since many times back, and always tries to drive them away from her land, even if they just passing by, and as violent as she is, most of them usually ends with death.

One night, a winged creature fell from the sky into the ruins, overwhelming the place with lots of power, causing a lot of change to happen on her land. At the very same time, some uninvited people came to the land of Tel’Aria with different backgrounds and purposes.

What would Aria do to those invaders? What would she do to protect her land from the creature and humans she hates so much?

II. Characters
Heroine - Tel’Aria
Age: 1158 y.o. (appears like 17)
Race: Master of Land
Appearance : Long silver hair, light colored eyes, pale skin, tall body stature
The land of Tel’Aria in being, also works as its guardian and controls everything on the land. She is quite violent and hates human so much, thus always get rids of them each time they violated her land. She is also very cold and a skeptical person, but may change or not, depends on player’s choice.
Personal quote: "I wish every human is as good as you. They don't know their foolishness only drive them to destruction, and to nothing."

Bachelors
1. Sachael
Age: ?? (appears like 16)
Race: Angel
Appearance: Honey blond hair (shoulder lenght), Green eyes, fair skin, small body build (color scheme: white)
An angel without angelic sense. He fell from the sky into Aria’s ruins, and basically woke up without remembering anything. He seems to have a great power which he isn’t very capable to control of, which cause 'chaos' as Aria calls it. With his presence, she can't kill anyone, causing her to dislike him pretty much.
Personality: Plain, honest, high-willed, a bit naive, very kind, and very patient
Personal quote: "I don't know about anything, but what I know is that I have to do this and you have to stop that."

2. Luce
Age: 18 y.o
Race: Human
Appearance: Short black Hair, dark blue eyes, fair skin, tall body stature (color scheme: black)
He comes from Tel’Emerus. He ran away from his kingdom in order to avoid his fate to serve his twin sister who’s becoming the queen of his kingdom. Once saved Ssidien thus regaining her loyalty. He is great in Swordsmanship.
Personality: cool, a bit pessimistic, calm, has brilliant mind, rebellious.
Personal quote: "I don't want to be bound by anything, regardless. My life is what I decide, although it's really hard to achieve so until now."

3. Marco
Age: 26 y.o
Race: Human
Appearance: short brown hair, hazel eyes, glasses (might be there or not), a bit tan skin, mid body stature (color scheme: brown)
Came to Tel’Aria in search of Flower of Eternity which said to be only grown on Aria’s land. A son of a noble family, and from a country which herbal and healing magic is said to be the best in the world. He is quite adequate of doing them himself.
Personality: optimistic, high-willed, never gives up, has tendency to hide everything
Personal quote: "I'd do what I want, even if it's impossible. I don't believe in this impossibility. It's an excuse to limit our ability, don't you think so?"

4. Tel’Emerus
Age: 1201 y.o (appears around 20)
Race: Master of Land
Appearance: long bluish silver hair, light colored eyes, pale skin, tall body stature (Color scheme: blue)
Master of the land Tel’Emerus, often visits Aria to erase his boredom, and sometime convince her to merge her land with his (which usually fails because of his interest to human). His current visit is to mock Luce and to once again convert Aria. He seems to be the one who knows Aria’s past, for him just few decades older than her.
Personality: cunning, sarcastic, mysterious, mischievous but kind, and attentive.
Personal quote: "Aria oh Aria. Why do you always do this to yourself? If you join me, you will see anything beyond than this little space of yours. Open your eyes and see. Forget about him, and forgive yourself."

5. Ira
Age: Around 20
Race: Human
Appearance: Short (probably spiky) maroon hair, light green eyes, fair skin, mid body stature (Color scheme: red)
An assassin thief who’s been hiding from the captures of bounty hunters after he was separated from his group with Sui. He seems to be never aware of the existence of 'Master of Land' before he meets Aria. He seems to be able to use magic.
Persona: cold, hostile, protective, caring, rash, straight forward
Personal quote: "I don't believe this myth they call as god or deity. I don't believe in you, and I don't believe that you have any power to turn my life."

Other Characters
1. Ssidien
Age: 16 y.o
Race: Human
Appearance: (Probably short) burgundy hair, black eyes, fair skin, small body stature
A female guardian of Luce, was a hostage prisoner and had her legs chopped off in order to make her unable to escape. She was saved and given fake pair of legs by Luce. Has been loyal to him since then, and consider him as a big brother. She is adequate in using knives as her weapon.
Personality: protective, worry wart, easily touched, and strong, doesn’t gives up easily
Personal quote: "I know that you're not evil. However, I won't forgive you if you ever hurt him. Even if it cost my life, I will kill you."

2. Sui
Age: ?? (appears 19)
Race: something certainly not human (according to Aria)
Appearance: Long light blue hair, aqua eyes, pale skin, tall body stature.
Ira’s ‘sister’ or apparently so. Both separated from group they belong, and has been running away together since ever from bounty hunters. She is gifted with great magical power. Sui has a great voice and always reminds Ira from his rashness
Personality: very kind and soft, and just like water, sometimes she can be calm, but sometimes can enrage. Very motherly and laid back pretty much
Personal quote: "Please, stop it. Nothing good will come out from both of you if you keep doing this."

More characters to come, but they've just been hidden for they may have spoil the stories.

III. World setting
Ruins and Heaven located in a world which is yet to be named. The world contains of many land and places. Each of it has their own 'master', who controls over the land or the place they own. Some owns a large land, while some owns small areas like forest or sea or merely a town. Most inhabitant of the world are humans, with some other races which population is much less from human. Magic and alchemy are something of common in this world, and electrical technology doesn't. However, there are some magic called as the "Dark Magic" which is a type of forbidden magic, since it was the spark of the war happened many years ago, and the result of the magic can destroy a third of the world.

As for above this world, is a place of 'world rulers', and they're known as Heaven Council. They direct over world with the help of mythical creature being known by most people as 'angels'. The Heaven Council, are often in clash with the Dark Witches Alliance and Demonic World, which said placed on the far 'end' of the world, and below it.

IV. Features
5 Bachelors to get (or not) with 12+ endings
Approximately 25+ CGs
Gallery which pretty much includes Character Profiles, CGs, and such.

V. Progress
Story : 75%
Script : 15%
Programming : 3%
Character designs : 50%
Sprites : 0%
Background : 0%
CGs: 0%
Music : 20%

VI. Team
Main Story Writer: Aozora210
Programmer: (probably me, but I'm looking for some help if there's anyone willing to help me)
Sprite Artist: Aozora210
CG & BG Artist: looking for some!
Other: looking for a lot of help!

_______________________________

Okay, I just started this project and I want to know what do you guys think so far. Some concept may change, but pretty much it'll stay like this. I also accept creative ideas or any other help.

Some questions.
Do you think the story seems too cliche? Do you think a violent main character is a yes? Do you think the characters are quite usual? I gotta admit some of their ideas maybe were similar to other characters existing or sort, and trust me, I was influenced by a lot of source. Is there any info you guys were interested in about the story or the characters? Is there anything you guys were expecting from this VN?

This is my first VN ever and I'll try to make it as best as I can, even though I seems to be jumping off quite far. Any comment from you guys might help me a lot. Also, I need opinions about using free royalty music as BGM sound (is it okay, or shouldn't be done?). In the mean time, I'll upload some designs later.

Some disclaimer: Title were inspired from Akiko Shikata's song, Haikyo to Rakuen, which means 'Ruins and Heaven'
Last edited by Aozora210 on Mon Apr 25, 2011 11:19 am, edited 8 times in total.
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Re: Ruins and Heaven (VN - WIP and looking for a lot of help

#2 Post by mysterialize » Mon Dec 20, 2010 6:34 pm

The story doesn't seem to be anything new, but what you said about it seems rather vague, so it's a little hard to judge it without seeing it in action. I feel like you could make it pretty interesting if you think of some interesting effects for the curse, come up with a cool cause for it. Some guy or something deciding "I want to wipe out humanity because it's corrupted!", or the earth doing the same because "Humanity is ruining it.", would be really cliche and make for disappointing reveals, for example. I can also see the use of a violent, goddess-like main character being pretty interesting.

I like the idea of a violent main character. It's different, and seem like it has a lot of potential for character development.

The other characters, on the other hand, seem to fall rather distinctly into character archetypes. It's hard to tell if this is because of the simplicity of the profiles, but as they are right now, I feel like I've seen several of their character types a few too many times before. Of course, I think a lot of what makes characters interesting is their motivation and all around reasons for acting the way they do. It all depends on the details.

Out of all of them, by what I've read up in their descriptions, I think I like Tel'Emerus the most. He has the sort of personality I think I would have fun seeing, and has a lot of potential for acting on personal goals/having an interesting twist to him.

As for royalty free music, I don't see why not. Just be careful to pick songs that aren't too easily recognizable. When I hear music I've already associated with something else, it tends to throw me off a little.

Good luck with this!

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Re: Ruins and Heaven (VN - WIP and looking for a lot of help

#3 Post by Lumen_Astrum » Sun Jan 02, 2011 2:43 am

Sounds cool~ C:
I'll be stalking this thread~

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Re: Ruins and Heaven (VN - WIP and looking for a lot of help

#4 Post by DaR » Sun Jan 02, 2011 10:00 am

Lumen_Astrum wrote:Sounds cool~ C:
I'll be stalking this thread~
^-^ I second this.
Tel'Aria sounds like an interesting person.
I support Mr. Darcy~ <3

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Re: Ruins and Heaven (VN - WIP and looking for a lot of help

#5 Post by Aozora210 » Sun Jan 02, 2011 2:13 pm

@mysterialize: thank you for your comments, they meant a lot for me. I haven't reveal many thing so yeah, they rather seems vague, The story will circles around Aria and the humans coming in her land, wishing to resides there for many different reasons. There are more sides involved for later stories, and it will be more complex. I've mentioned about magic and heaven council in the world settings. They will have some involvement, though it won't be any far focus at the most part of the game.

About the humanity hater, I gotta admit there are something very small like that, but it wasn't become the center part of the story. The problem with Aria is just she has hard time to trust human, thus somewhat 'hate' them.

About the other characters, I gotta admit I have to make them fall into some general categories since it's mostly like that in most of the game, but I'm developing them further, in hope that they will distinct themselves from some ordinary type of characters.

And thank you for liking Tel'Emerus! I personally think that he is quite a challenge myself, so I will work hard on him more! XD

@Lumen_Astrum and DaR: thank you very much! XD

I'm trying to make a violent main character, as I rarely see main character of the game with this kind of personality XD

Anyway... I made a vow to myself that I won't make any post in here before I finish my character design, but now that I seems to make some progress in design, I think I will show you guys some headshots and sketches.

Image

Some designs might get some details addition, and some face need reconstruction >_> as some face didn't match their personality.

Anyway, still open for comments, and I'll be looking forward to it! XD
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Re: Ruins and Heaven (VN - WIP and looking for a lot of help

#6 Post by Aleema » Sun Jan 02, 2011 2:20 pm

Oh maaaaan. Looking at those character designs, I really, really want to play this game. And definitely learn about the world. Their designs are so flavored and exotic ... That's right up my alley. I love your art style. This game yes please.

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Re: Ruins and Heaven (VN - WIP and looking for a lot of help

#7 Post by Aozora210 » Mon Jan 03, 2011 1:14 pm

Am... am I dreaming of getting Aleema's comment? *A*

I'm glad that you seems to like the design. A friend of mine was complaining that they seems too simple, but I'm actually quite happy myself with their designs. Glad that you seems really interested in this game. I will work hard! XD
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Re: Ruins and Heaven (VN - WIP and looking for a lot of help

#8 Post by Aleema » Mon Jan 03, 2011 1:31 pm

I love the way you drew them. You can tell a lot about their personality just from the art, too. Love the world you're building, like the story (where the MC isn't the newbie invading the story, it's the other people), and I love fantasy in general.
So ... Aozora FIGHT-O! p(^0^)q
Knock it out of the park.

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Re: Ruins and Heaven (GxB VN - WIP)

#9 Post by mysterialize » Wed Jan 05, 2011 10:00 pm

I'm glad I could be of some help, even if it was just through a short comment. XD

I have to agree about the character designs. They each have distinct hair and I personally rather like it when characters have an accessory or two to place them apart from each other. They look nice.

If I had to complain about anything about them it's that all the guys have really similar faces. Ira looks different enough, but the others could use some slightly more unique features. Maybe try giving them some different eye shapes, or eye/nose/mouth placement? If your style allows it, giving them unique face shapes could really do wonders as well.

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Re: Ruins and Heaven (GxB VN - WIP)

#10 Post by Aozora210 » Thu Jan 06, 2011 1:26 pm

@Aleema: Thank you very much! >_< I'll do my best!

@mysterialize: Now that you mention about it, the other four guys do realy look alike o.o
Ira was different because he's been draw separated with them. I guess that's what makes him different. Thank you for pointing them out, and also thank you for the suggestion XD I was really about to redraw their face again. :3
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Re: Ruins and Heaven (GxB VN - WIP)

#11 Post by Riviera » Thu Jan 06, 2011 4:24 pm

Yeah... Luce, Sach and Marr all have a similar face shape, and are all looking in the same direction, so they do look very alike.

I think Ira looks unique enough, but that's because the bandanna + eye color makes him look more striking. :)
Will edit/proofread for cookies.

Image
I do free voicework! Click here for samples

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Re: Ruins and Heaven (GxB VN - WIP)

#12 Post by Aozora210 » Fri Jan 07, 2011 5:15 pm

Ah, yes, Riviera. Their face is being reconstructed, though finding the right face for them is really hard. >_<

About Ira, so far he is the only character with a lot of color diversity. I might enhance the other more, though. His eyes color is indeed kinda different, but he has the same eyes type as Marco. Though they both are humans, they are from the same race (though Marco has more mixed genetics), while Luce is on different other human race (just think like there's caucasian, mongoloid, etc.). Anyway, he's the same like Ssidien, though, but well, her pictures haven't been released here.

And the reason why most of them are in 3/4 side, because I want to make the game's interface where the characters would seems as if they're facing each other with their own height comparison, but I'm still not sure, either.
Here's an example
Another one (Grim Grimmoire has the most beautiful VN type of interface ever, in my opinion.)

Also updates...
Currently I'm having 1,240 words at story scripts. Some musics has been found for some scenes, and I messed up a little with the programming (basically I'm just make some inputs into the programs, lol)
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Re: Ruins and Heaven (GxB VN - WIP)

#13 Post by ririruetoo » Fri Jul 29, 2011 12:17 am

I like the sound of this game! Art is pretty...
ImageImageImage

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