Lemma Soft Forums

Hello! Thank you for taking time to look at my post >///<
This is my first Visual Novel and it's relatively simple in concept. By posting this, I'm hoping to get a cast of people who'd like to assist in the creation. The game has already been started, but it's proven a bit overwhelming for me alone. I've rewrote the opening scene multiple times, and am relatively lost as I am new with Ren'py as well.

Real quick, a brief description of my game:
You play as Kaito, a young adult who was a victim of a car accident when he was young. The accident put him into a coma, and when he awoke he had severe amnesia. After a few years of therapy and recovery, he is back on track with one problem: he still can't remember a crucial part of his past.
In hopes of recovering what he's missing, he decides to move to his hometown, where he meets three girls his age, all three of which bring a nostalgic feeling he can't place. The girl that you choose to pursue will open up a story that reveals his past. Each girl will likely have a bad and good ending (if I can figure it out)

Now here's where I stand: I can do my own art, character portraits, coding (with some help as I learn my way around the engine) and things of that regard. For instance:




However, with these three girls I have defined backstories and ideas of endings, but the in-between, as planned as it is, I can't comprehend. I suppose writing isn't my strongsuit. So what I'm asking for along the lines of help is:


-Writers
-Background artists
-(possibly) Musical artist

Regarding that last one, I already have a musical artist but he is doing it casually, and isn't passionately into it, so I may need either a replacement, or someone to work along side him.

If you choose to help me, you should know that I cannot offer pay. Unfortunately, I am a homely college student with no income.
I would also like a skype name, if available, so we can keep up with each other's progress.

On the other side, if you do not want to work with me and are just interested in the game, feel free to follow my progress on my tumblr: http://lprogress.tumblr.com/

Character profiles:


Name: Mie (Mee-ay)
Relation to Kaito's past: Unknown
Age: Unknown
Personality:
She is by far the most mysterious of the girls. She has an attachment to a particular book you often find her carrying around. She is quiet, blank, and usually neutral about any matter of opinion. However, when she opens up, she has a silly side and tends to cling onto you frequently.
Spoiler:
Her branch of the storyline will reveal that Mie, going by a different name, was close friends with Kaito as a child, but lived in an abusive household. She would often sneak out of her home to be with Kaito so she could escape her parents. However, one day they catch her and kill her, resulting in a fierce trauma for Kaito. It will turn out that Kaito's consciousness chose, while it had the opportunity, to erase that trauma entirely.
Her spirit, still holding the want to sneak away and be with Kaito, clung to earth and refused to pass. The book she clings to is one she wrote, holding her entire story and everything that happened. Good and bad endings will likely result in her passing to the other side, either happily or unhappily.


Name: Keiko
Relation to Kaito's past: Went to school together
Age: 19
Personality:
Keiko is a mature, maternal girl that helps her father run a library out of the floor level of their house. She likes to make jabs at you and be sarcastic, but in a subtle way that tends to catch people off guard.
Spoiler:
Keiko starts the game out with a boyfriend, who is a long-term friend of hers. Later it reveals that her boyfriend has been using her for her body, and has been forcing her to give herself to him. Behind the scenes, it is also revealed that Keiko has a close relationship with her father, because her mother isn't in the country. Unfortunately, it turns out that her father was hiding from Keiko that her mother died after giving birth from a heart condition, and her last words were, "I want Keiko to live normally," resulting in Keiko's father delusionally refusing to take Keiko in for testing for the heart condition that her mother died of. Meanwhile, while she learns this devastating news, she gets pregnant with her boyfriend's child, and he leaves her for it. You step in and help her out. Bad and good endings will likely result in either Keiko dying like her mom, or living.
The cause of the anmesia for this route isn't clearly developed yet. A writer talented in these types of stories could help me think of ideas.


Name: Kairi
Relation to Kaito's past: Played in the playground together
Age: 18
Personality:
Funky and tomboyish, Kairi is the loud friend that you never asked for. She is proud and sporty, regardless of her short stature. She excels at all sports but golf. She enjoys anything that keeps her body moving, and cannot handle just about anything else. At occasions, she can be quite childish.
Spoiler:
Kairi is by far the most underdeveloped character I have made. I would like a talented writer to help me with her. Basically, it will reveal that Kairi and Kaito were close as kids, and while driving, Kairi's car is the car that hit Kaito's, causing the accident. While Kaito lost his father and went into a coma, Kairi survived but her infant sister died.
It will eventually show you that Kairi was supposed to die in that accident, but her sister's spirit, upon dying, refused to let her beloved sister die and attached itself to her in an attempt to save her life. It was enough to pull her through, and now Kairi's body is holding two spirits in her body, causing a lot of mood swings, sleep walking, and problems like that. Kaito, upon learning that Kairi also was in the car accident, blocked her out so that he wouldn't worry about her, much the same way his mind took the opportunity in Mie's route.

Hey, nice to see you're starting here already!
I'll give you some tips .
Maybe you should place a character description for each of them, so people know what kind of girls to expect. Check the game with lint and something with this text should appear. You should copy that text and post it every time you update so people can check your progress .

The game contains 5 screens of dialogue.
These screens contain a total of 13 words,
for an average of 2.6 words per screen.
The game contains 1 menus.

Oh, and one last thing. Recruiting goes into the Recruitment section. You should create a new post there, remove recruiting from this post to the new one and link from that one back here .
I'm not an expert either but I hope this small tips help .

Exactly what are you looking for in a writer? Someone who'll write according to your directions, someone who helps YOU write or someone who writes the story you want but with reasonable freedom of exercise? You attract different people depending on what sort of writer you are looking for, so if you could be specific, you could probably get help somewhat quicker. Note that none of the three are exactly wrong; Some writers enjoy just writing according to directions, some like assisting and others do enjoy writing a story of their own within specific boundaries.

It also helps to lay down the fundamentals or at the least the things you have, even if short and summarised. It gives people an idea of what we're working with, and overall we won't really mind "spoilers"; We're all developers here and would still read your game even if we were terribly spoiled. (Also, developers aren't your only audience!)

One thing I'm curious about is the amnesia thing. Getting into an accident, awaking after a coma and then several years of treatment implies that Kaito (as a young adult) has a severe gap in his childhood, which would have effects on him that treatment can only make easier to deal with, not completely erase. Is this a character element you are keen to keep in the story, or is the major thing that his amnesia needs explanation, as that appears to be the focus?

Thank you! Yeah, I realized that. It hasn't happened yet but I messaged an admin about moving it over shortly after it was posted.

As for character descriptions, I can do that right now.

Applegate wrote:Exactly what are you looking for in a writer? Someone who'll write according to your directions, someone who helps YOU write or someone who writes the story you want but with reasonable freedom of exercise? You attract different people depending on what sort of writer you are looking for, so if you could be specific, you could probably get help somewhat quicker. Note that none of the three are exactly wrong; Some writers enjoy just writing according to directions, some like assisting and others do enjoy writing a story of their own within specific boundaries.

It also helps to lay down the fundamentals or at the least the things you have, even if short and summarised. It gives people an idea of what we're working with, and overall we won't really mind "spoilers"; We're all developers here and would still read your game even if we were terribly spoiled. (Also, developers aren't your only audience!)

One thing I'm curious about is the amnesia thing. Getting into an accident, awaking after a coma and then several years of treatment implies that Kaito (as a young adult) has a severe gap in his childhood, which would have effects on him that treatment can only make easier to deal with, not completely erase. Is this a character element you are keen to keep in the story, or is the major thing that his amnesia needs explanation, as that appears to be the focus?

What I'm looking for is someone to handle the guidelines of my story, and be creative and write out their respective branch with what I've written up as guidelines. For instance, if I told you that this that and the other happens with a particular character, they'll mind that and write the dialogue/scenes that follow that.

And about Kaito's Amnesia, it is crucial that it remains unknown about his amnesia, because each girl will pose a different reason as to why his amnesia is the way it is. I will update character profiles to include the juicier parts of the storyline that I initially avoided spoiling.

I tend to like BxG stories and games, even if I regard them as a guilty pleasure. Even though I've been kinda stressed and busy lately, I'll try to follow this thread. Since I don't know much about visual art, I'm not sure what to recommend. I can provide more advice on things like writing and structure.

* Is your story set in contemporary Japan? Have you, or a person you know well, lived there in the recent past? If you answered "yes" to the first question and "no" to the second question, then make sure to do your research.
* Will your visual novel have more than a few choices?
* Do you plan to create any complex gameplay?
* How much time will pass before the main character has to commit to one of the three girls?
* How easy will it be to tell what decisions will lead to which character routes and which outcomes?
* Will this be more of a drama than a comedy?
* In terms of content, what sort of movie or video game rating would your VN get?

Koniki wrote:By posting this, I'm hoping to get a cast of people who'd like to assist in the creation. The game has already been started, but it's proven a bit overwhelming for me alone. I've rewrote the opening scene multiple times, and am relatively lost as I am new with Ren'py as well.

Some people find that working with a co-writer is useful, while others find it frustrating. Be sure to look for the Writing Excuses audio podcast for their discussion about collaboration (season 3, episode 32).

How much do you like planning your stories in advance, and how much do you like making them up on the fly? Both are good choices, but if you find that planning too much or improvising too much is difficult, then you might want to think about your process. I know that I just talked about Writing Excuses, but they have a lot to say about this topic.

Koniki wrote:Funky and tomboyish, Kairi is the loud friend that you never asked for. She is proud and sporty, regardless of her short stature. She excels at all sports but golf. She enjoys anything that keeps her body moving, and cannot handle just about anything else.

More than the other two, this character's personality appeals to my interests.

gekiganwing wrote:
* Is your story set in contemporary Japan? Have you, or a person you know well, lived there in the recent past? If you answered "yes" to the first question and "no" to the second question, then make sure to do your research.
* Will your visual novel have more than a few choices?
* Do you plan to create any complex gameplay?
* How much time will pass before the main character has to commit to one of the three girls?
* How easy will it be to tell what decisions will lead to which character routes and which outcomes?
* Will this be more of a drama than a comedy?
* In terms of content, what sort of movie or video game rating would your VN get?

* No, unless I recruit someone in my team that has enough experience in or around contemporary Japan that would have the knowledge necessary. I was simply going to leave the name of the town they lived in up to the reader's imagination (nameless) and have the place they live western in appearance. The japanese names are mostly because these characters were recycled from old stories that never were, so I gave them a second chance by putting them in this project.
* I am still learning Ren'Py but I am hoping to be able to incorporate enough choices to make getting different endings more fun.
* No complex gameplay. Just story in front of you.
* I was hoping people I recruit to help me on this matter, since this my first ever project and I am not well versed in this. All I know is my VN will have strict no flip-flopping, so once you start going one path, you can't change your mind, simply because each girl changes the story to their unique backstory.
* Pretty easily. I considered flat out asking at some point, but then I realized how terribly bland that would be.
* I was hoping for a blend of comedy in there, to keep interest. But, obviously, there will be a lot of drama.
* I wouldn't have anything too terrible, either than themes. So probably like PG 13 or something along those lines. As you would tell from some of the spoilers, part of it gets pretty heavy sexual themes, but nothing will be outright shown.

Hi, the story have caught my attention. I am no talented writer but if you're still in need of one, I would love to help you out.
Edited: Just in case. In my thread, A wild Strawberry appeared, I've posted some details about me as a writer and some excerpt of my writings. It's under the same section as this topic.

Hmm... I only gave this a cursory glance, but the characters seem really cute and I'm really interested to see a game with bxg setting (it's definitely more rare around here, i feel) and slightly older charas.
while I am a writer myself, I'm working on a short story atm, so I can tell you to do your best... Or here's a really tsundereish way to say it, If it really seems like you'd still need help, I might consider it... I do want to see this going somewhere.

Even if you are not able to actively help, you're still welcome on my team, even if just to toss around ideas with! If you have skypes, and want to possibly consider it, I would love to snag them from you so, at the very least, we can talk about it. (I'm not very forum savvy, to be entirely honest. Skype is more comfortable to me. But if you would rather not give me something personal, we can stay on here.)

I also have a facebook, deviantart, and email if you want better ways to talk about it.

There you go, there's a little progress shot. It's a CG that it nearing completion. Sketch for this shot is up in the primary post.

This sounds very interesting! Especially one of the girls being a ghost, hope this can attract more support!