Lemma Soft Forums

This is all animation quality at the moment. Ignore the shade markups since some parts does not make sense and was too lazy to change to a different color Lol. But if anyone has an idea of what kind of story this could be, please give advice and help me out.

LVUER wrote:Me too. It's very hard to make an idea for short VN. How could you think something up like that? Any tip?

Read books. Not fluffy sci-fi or light novels - real books.
Otherwise, ask the community, that's why we're here.

@ terrydy
All your drawing have a flaw with the neck - it's too long.

It should also be slightly wider, but I couldn't draw it on the computer, so you'll have to try that yourself.

On a positive note, you have an excellent perception of volume. Wish I had it.

Blue Sky wrote:I cried a little inside when I saw your drawings.

There is a God...

Yes, there is a God...

hmmm... A music VN, why not adding the girl's rival... i haven't notice any otome VN yet where there IS a rival... so as with normal VN's...

create a tense atmosphere, almost 10246% more intense than two superstar Idols battling each other for love and fame.

Yes, there will be a rival, but still trying to figure out whether to make male rivals or females rivals. The rivalry will create some jealousy and can be used to create many different types of atmosphere and situations.

done with basic draft for chara 1, going to be doing full body for chara 1 later on when I get a chance. I will try to draft a story for the moment.

Once again, the neck on the right sketch is too thin. If you'll try to draw her naked, you'll see it's impossible - almost a third of her neck is missing.

I removed some of your lines from the left one, to make my point clear.

fortaat wrote: Read books. Not fluffy sci-fi or light novels - real books.
Otherwise, ask the community, that's why we're here.

like the great gatsby kind of books? o_O
any recommendation would be good

Lol, nice eye, but of course these will not make perfect sense for the drawings, they are just drafts and are not proportionally refined or line refined. I understand there are many visual mistakes, I will do a more corrective draft for my final chara 1 draft.

Hmm I don't like that correction. I know the neck was too thin but you drew the neck too thick and it looks like a male's.

I guess I'll echo what everyone's been saying: Great art!

I think the original neck is mostly fine. Although as Fortaat states, realistic proportions would require a wider neck, it looks natural for anime-style art. If anything, I think the neck would be slightly wider but also placed further back in the side and 3/4 views. But as you say, this is a draft, after all. The feel of the character should be more important.

Is there anybody interested to make a music based romance VN here?

I don't know if this means that you're recruiting, but if that is the case, I may be interested.

mechnist wrote: like the great gatsby kind of books? o_O
any recommendation would be good

Exactly like The Great Gatsby - only not this one in particular, I found it quite dull.
I need to know what you like, so I'll know what to recommend.
However, you could try either of these two short books, both around 100 pages long:

Die Verwirrungen des Zöglings Törleß (The Confusions of Young Torless), Robert Musil - on the surface it's a very simple coming of age story, portratyed with very dark tones. The plot is very engaging, and intertwined with sophisticated symbolism.

As I Lay Dying, William Faulkner - 15 different narrators in 59 chapters, written by one the finest writers of the 20th century.
I would avoid it if it's your first time reading stream of consciousness, but otherwise it's an amazing book.

Lekhaka wrote:it looks natural for anime-style art

I get a "her head is gonna fall off" vibe. But, a draft is a draft.

There is no plan as of this moment right now for recruiting, but there might be one really soon. I am trying to get some writing drafts in the next few days. And do 2 or 3 more chara draft sheets, and then might be ready for some recruits and helpers by the next few weeks.

fortaat wrote: Exactly like The Great Gatsby - only not this one in particular, I found it quite dull.
I need to know what you like, so I'll know what to recommend.
However, you could try either of these two short books, both around 100 pages long:

Die Verwirrungen des Zöglings Törleß (The Confusions of Young Torless), Robert Musil - on the surface it's a very simple coming of age story, portratyed with very dark tones. The plot is very engaging, and intertwined with sophisticated symbolism.

As I Lay Dying, William Faulkner - 15 different narrators in 59 chapters, written by one the finest writers of the 20th century.
I would avoid it if it's your first time reading stream of consciousness, but otherwise it's an amazing book.

thanks for the recommendations!
2nd one sounds interesting...15 different narrators wow lol
well i did like lord of the flies... separate peace..and life of pi

Rough with some uncleaned lines (I know there are some anatomical and line checking problems, but note this is not illustration quality at the moments). I had some time, I am starting on the written draft sort of, will post the texts onto this thread when I get the writing done.

Cool. It's a mirror right? But what are those rectangles at her left hand?

And is this the main character?