[Dating sim questions] Would you date a partner who doesn't put you as their first?

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Re: [Dating sim questions] Would you date a partner who doesn't put you as their first?

#16 Post by puppetbomb » Sat Mar 17, 2018 4:00 am

If I knew I would never be the first priority for me SO, whether or not it's for a good reason like ailing parents, I would end the relationship. I'm not so magnanimous that I would be OK with sharing an SO's schedule and mental and emotional energy (basically, I'm the worst candidate for a poly relationship).

Going off into the dealbreaker tangent: Assuming both people respect, love and are presently in a happy, healthy relationship, here's a few things I can think of that can make it fall apart when thinking either in the long-term or marriage:
  • Children. Kind of a given.
  • Living situation. How do you feel about living with someone else's family?
  • Health. Could you keep calm if your SO had a seizure?
  • Lifestyle. Would you live with a smoker?
It's not an exhaustive list by any means, but it's a couple I know are dealbreakers for more than just me ^^;

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Re: [Dating sim questions] Would you date a partner who doesn't put you as their first?

#17 Post by Mammon » Sun Mar 18, 2018 11:55 am

I think this is more a matter of how much rather than if. Depending on where you put that line, this is already something you can find in a lot of VN. In Katawa Shojo the painter girl puts her painting over you for at least the first half of the story, and plenty of other VN have similar stories. That's not a matter of them putting the other over you rather than it being their gimmick. How often did you have a date with a LI in the pet store where they worked or at home because their mother is sick, or with the child they have present during the date because they're a single dad? It's part of their personality rather than something they place over you, so unless you make it the front piece of their character or intentionally driving home the fact that they'll put it before you and the MC having to work to become priority number one or having to accept the second stage, many people might not even see it as such a theme.

What I'm saying, if you do this you might accidentally make a loveable character rather than one putting you second. It's the VN format, you have to conquer them than the other way around.

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