Love at the Laundromat [GxB][Romance, Comedy, Drama] DEMO UP

[Nische]

Totes stalking this, it's designed so nicely. I like it!

Thank you very much! :'D

Wow...everything about this is just awesome! I especially love your art and the graphics, asldkjal;dj;alks. I can't wait until it comes out.
My personal favorite out of the cast is Miles. But they're all good-looking and seem pretty interesting so o////o.

Thank you *A*
I'm so happy, when Miles first came out, no one wanted him. D':
The redesign was well worth it. :'D

The updates to the sprites work nicely. I'm with you and didn't notice the super long necks until it was pointed out. The additional people are looking good. I like the seasonal splash screens on a purely artistic level, but they don't say "love at the laundromat" like the rest of the graphics all do. It looks out of place at the moment. I like the things you chose to represent the season, I personally would have chosen a pine branch so the colors wouldn't be the same as fall and I wouldn't need to draw snow.

I have no idea why I didn't think of pine, hahaha. I'm redrawing it. >_<
I don't know why I drew berries. ;_;

I wanted the chapter splash page to be completely different from the main GUI so it would make a clear pronounced cut in between seasons and flashbacks. I got some suggestions from people telling me to integrate the blue and pink and other design elements from the other pages so that the designs would 'marry' more, but that's not what I'm after. ;_; The discontinuity will help with the story telling in my opinion, especially since there are some skips in time between seasons. It gives the impression without me needing to announce it... or at least that's what I'm aiming for.

You could use color schemes. You've got a cool and bright color scheme for stuff that happens in the present, why not use a more subdued warm scheme for the past stuff? Other methods I've seen: Different border, grayscale images, sepia tones, vignetting (what you've got with that gray border).

It's only two years ago which is why I didn't use sepia or grayscale. Those two seem to give off a more 'decade ago' or 'century ago' feel. xD
Do the borders not look good?

Miles' hands look better, in my opinion. There's a useful tutorial that's listed in the Art Learning Resources thread in the Asset Creation: Art forum, though. You probably already know this, but you might want to check it out.

I don't really explore Lemma so this link is completely new to me. *A*

The new sprites look good. The only thing I have to complain about is the left guy's eyes. Normally, your eyes are slightly covered by your eyelids; that's the lines of flesh above the eyes when your character is looking at you normally. When you can see all of the pupils, your eyelids are usually pulled all the way back, leaving no eyelid lines above. It's hard to explain in words, but what I'm trying to say is that there's something wrong with the guy's eyes. If he's surprised, his eyelid will be pulled all the way back to reveal the full pupil.
...I'm sorry, my explanation sucks. "OTL I don't know of any other way to explain it without visuals... >_<

I'm not sure what you mean either, hahaha. I'm sorry. D':
Are you saying his eyes are too big because the crease is too high up? He has big eyes, does that help? He's supposed to be giving you a lazy gaze. So when he's surprised or angry, his eyelids go up and reveal the rest of his big eyes. (You're right, its hard to explain without visuals, hahaha)

EDIT:
GOSH, I can't believe I didn't understand that. Let me apologize and use the excuse that it's past midnight to explain why I'm so slow, hahaha. I reread the post and realized what you meant. I GET IT. >_< Omg so sorry for not understanding and completely missing what you were trying to say despite the fact that everything was written right there hahahaha. I'll lower the crease >_<

I also agree with Sharm. The season changing scenes don't look very Love at the Laundromat-ish. Maybe you could make the colour brighter?

Same explanation as Sharm. I will ask my game prof to have a look at it though since it seems to bother you two.

The border is nice, although my personal preference is to have the decorations at the corners instead of the middle.

My personal preference are centered ornaments, ahahaha. I'm sorry. ;_;
I'll make a cornered version though to see if it's better.
For the flashbacks im planning for the text to appear either novel styled and centered or as subtitles at the bottom where the black bar appears.

I think having the flashbacks in CGs is alright, provided you have the time. The most common method I can think of for flashbacks is to either have a border, have the colouring slightly blurred, sepia, or a darker tone as compared to the normal colours, and to have the textbox grayed out. Some people also put it in italics.

I'm planning on making the colors brighter, lighter and having a white feathered border around the image.

By the way, this is unrelated, but does Moustachio Studios consist of only you?

Uhmm... no. Neko-niki is part of Moustachio Studios too but she's too busy with school to work on her game. As of right now, I'm the only one working on LatL.
EDIT:
OH, and netravelr is working on LatL too of course. He's doing the coding which is a huge weight of my shoulders. He's a life saver. *A*
But as for moustachio, officially, it's just me (ehcs) and Nik.


On another note:
Neko Niki drew another bachelor xD
This time it's Sol:


And someone mentioned LatL on a tumblr post. *A*
I'm so happy, hahaha:
http://otomesweetheart.tumblr.com/post/ ... laundromat

[selenity136]

Miles's new hands look big for some reason o.o. He got big hands.

The new supporting character in the middle, there's something odd about her breasts. For some reason, I can't take my eyes off it o.O. I think it might be have it's drawn/place. That could be just me though, but yea...can't take my eyes off it.

The chapter pages totally look off from the overall feel of the game. Like others suggested before me, I would suggest the same thing--and that is adding a bit of color to it. I know you wanted something that completely distinguish from the game itself by making it known it's a new chapter, but I think you might went a bit too overboard in that the viewers would get completely thrown off for a second. It's like...you're going from cutesy to elegant than back to cutesy again. Am I making any sense?

I dig the borders for the flashback. It gives that cinematic feel to the game. If by some chance you do have to use sprites for flashbacks, you could put a sephia tone to it--I think that's possible?. Or keep it CG--but that would mean a bit more work for you wouldn't it? =(

----

I am gushing the new Sol fanart. You said that Neko Niki drew another bachelor? So...some other bachelor was drawn. Who was it and was it posted?

[Pandora]

Oh man, that fanart. Me gusta!

[Sharm]

You could use color schemes. You've got a cool and bright color scheme for stuff that happens in the present, why not use a more subdued warm scheme for the past stuff? Other methods I've seen: Different border, grayscale images, sepia tones, vignetting (what you've got with that gray border).

It's only two years ago which is why I didn't use sepia or grayscale. Those two seem to give off a more 'decade ago' or 'century ago' feel. xD
Do the borders not look good?

Oh, by different border, I meant different from the normal CG's. I've read a few manga where the panels go from being on a white background to being on a black to denote a difference in time, and that was the sort of thing I was suggesting. I think what you've got will work just fine, I just wanted to suggest other alternatives since you sounded like you weren't sure if you wanted to go with what you had.

[RunicV]

And it's fine, I reread my post and it was a bit vague, too. ^^"

I think I'd prefer you having subtitles on the flashbacks. I've never really liked NVL-style as it blocks out the pretty art.

Everyone in Moustachio Studios has the letter N as the first letter of their name. o_O

-looks at the picture- -nosebleeds- Not bad...

Some people blur out the corners in flashback scenes. It gives it a rather rushed, snapshot-in-time look, which I kind of like. /fails at explaining

[GeneDNC]

I like the border and purely-CG idea for flashbacks. I agree with the others about the season start pages though. I think a whole page with the season name and a pretty plant graphic is enough to give a "clear pronounced cut in between seasons". Even if you, for example, just colour the word Spring, etc that blue that is used in the GUI, I think that should be enough. It will also in fact, highlight the season name and make it draw the eye better on the page. I'd keep the "indented" look though.

Another thing that's bugging me (and you deserve a medal for putting up with all the nit-picks) is the creases in Miles' blue shirt. Specifically the top and bottom almost-horizontal ones. I'm not an expert on men's shirts but those creases don't look natural for his pose. It looks like he forgot to take out one of those rectangular cardboard pieces that are sometimes packaged with button shirts when you buy them.

On another note:
Neko Niki drew another bachelor xD
This time it's Sol:

Wow that's awesome. But wait, if this is "another bachelor", where's the pic of the first one/others? Or did I just miss something?

[Nische]

I really want to have people/beta-readers look over the story as soon as possible so I'll be focusing all my free-time to writing and revamping the main story and bachelor arcs. That being said, I probably won't have much time to work on the art and GUI of the game. Seeing as I can't really update this thread with snippets of the story, as it may spoil the game, I'll only be posting here to reply to comments, questions, suggestions, and concerns.

I should really set deadlines to each aspect of this game. ;_;
I am seriously WAY behind my planned schedule. I don't think I'll be able to release a demo as soon as I had hoped. It's such a downer. ;_;

Miles's new hands look big for some reason o.o. He got big hands.

Big feet too. And you know what they say about men with big feet. ;P

ANYWAY, yeah. I see what you mean. I'll try to shrink his hands a bit once I start working on the sprites again. :'D

The new supporting character in the middle, there's something odd about her breasts. For some reason, I can't take my eyes off it o.O. I think it might be have it's drawn/place. That could be just me though, but yea...can't take my eyes off it.

Odd how? It looks wrong? Too big? Too perky? Too high? Too low?

"I think it might be have it's drawn/place."
-What does that meeean. *A*
Oh, so cryptic, hahahaha.

The chapter pages totally look off from the overall feel of the game. Like others suggested before me, I would suggest the same thing--and that is adding a bit of color to it. I know you wanted something that completely distinguish from the game itself by making it known it's a new chapter, but I think you might went a bit too overboard in that the viewers would get completely thrown off for a second. It's like...you're going from cutesy to elegant than back to cutesy again. Am I making any sense?

I think the main reason I've been avoiding facing this issue head on is the fact that I'm still feeling a bit of artistic pride towards the design. I'll let myself cool off for a bit and revisit the design again.

I dig the borders for the flashback. It gives that cinematic feel to the game. If by some chance you do have to use sprites for flashbacks, you could put a sephia tone to it--I think that's possible?. Or keep it CG--but that would mean a bit more work for you wouldn't it? =(

At the risk of sounding mawkishly sentimental, I'd do anything for this game - the extra effort I'd be putting in by making the flashbacks purely CG is no problem at all if it means it'll improve the game.

Oh man, that fanart. Me gusta!

Me gusta también!

Oh, by different border, I meant different from the normal CG's. I've read a few manga where the panels go from being on a white background to being on a black to denote a difference in time, and that was the sort of thing I was suggesting. I think what you've got will work just fine, I just wanted to suggest other alternatives since you sounded like you weren't sure if you wanted to go with what you had.

Normal CGs don't have borders though. o:
If ever I do add borders to the normal CGs, it would be plain black bars without the centered ornaments.
Thanks for the suggestion! :')

And it's fine, I reread my post and it was a bit vague, too. ^^"
I think I'd prefer you having subtitles on the flashbacks. I've never really liked NVL-style as it blocks out the pretty art.

Yeah, I'm leaning towards the subtitles thing too. xD

Everyone in Moustachio Studios has the letter N as the first letter of their name. o_O

Actually, I'm ehcs *A*
The account is just called Nische because we were originally Nische Games. (combination of our names swooshed together to form a more or less appropriate word. xD)

-looks at the picture- -nosebleeds- Not bad...

*A*

Some people blur out the corners in flashback scenes. It gives it a rather rushed, snapshot-in-time look, which I kind of like. /fails at explaining

Don't worry, I think I get what you mean, hahaha. I'll try it out once I start working on the CGs. :'D

I like the border and purely-CG idea for flashbacks. I agree with the others about the season start pages though. I think a whole page with the season name and a pretty plant graphic is enough to give a "clear pronounced cut in between seasons". Even if you, for example, just colour the word Spring, etc that blue that is used in the GUI, I think that should be enough. It will also in fact, highlight the season name and make it draw the eye better on the page. I'd keep the "indented" look though.

I'm seriously against making major changes as the moment, but your suggestion seems at least doable for me right now. I'll try and see how it looks like if I change the Season type to the GUI blue. Thanks for the suggestion!

Another thing that's bugging me (and you deserve a medal for putting up with all the nit-picks) is the creases in Miles' blue shirt. Specifically the top and bottom almost-horizontal ones. I'm not an expert on men's shirts but those creases don't look natural for his pose. It looks like he forgot to take out one of those rectangular cardboard pieces that are sometimes packaged with button shirts when you buy them.

I am horrible with folds and I haven't really gone into studying them just yet. This project is actually the first one where I tried to put more pronounced folding and such but I can only expect there to be several errors with my attempt. I'll try to figure out how the folds are supposed to appear and I'll post a revised version once I start working on the sprites again. :'D

I am gushing the new Sol fanart. You said that Neko Niki drew another bachelor? So...some other bachelor was drawn. Who was it and was it posted?

Wow that's awesome. But wait, if this is "another bachelor", where's the pic of the first one/others? Or did I just miss something?

Yes *A* It was Eli and I posted it a couple of weeks ago. xD
She drew Eli first since Eli's story/arc was the first one I told her about, hahaha.


Neko-niki is like the ultimate pillar of support for me. *A*
Whenever I get stumped and feel like going on a hiatus, she draws me one of the bachelors and i find myself gushing so much that I become adamant about finishing the game. xD

[ShadowBerry]

It looks awesome and the story is quite nice.
Slice-of-life but still intersting enough to play.
Will it be free or commercial?

[netravelr]

It looks awesome and the story is quite nice.
Slice-of-life but still intersting enough to play.
Will it be free or commercial?

I'm fairly certain Nische has said the game will be commercial, but I'm sure she's doing her best to make sure that it's well worth your hard-earned money.

[KittyKatStar]

Kinda skimmed the entire thread since I just noticed this now. The art looks amazing (especially Nicholas Moore. I love those type of characters).

Looking forward to it. ^^ Definitely keeping an eye out for this one.

Edit: Also, if I may ask, since it's going commercial what price are you thinking of? (Asking only so I can save up in advance ^^;;; ) It's an instant buy from me since I'd like to support this. =)

[Lost-Guitarist]

Wow, this game looks so nice!

[selenity136]

Any news so far? ^^

[Nische]

Sorry for not being able to update on any art yet. Still fixing up the story.

Kinda skimmed the entire thread since I just noticed this now. The art looks amazing (especially Nicholas Moore. I love those type of characters).

Looking forward to it. ^^ Definitely keeping an eye out for this one.

Edit: Also, if I may ask, since it's going commercial what price are you thinking of? (Asking only so I can save up in advance ^^;;; ) It's an instant buy from me since I'd like to support this. =)

Thank you very much!
We're still deciding between $10~$15

We're trying to outsource as little as possible. That way we can keep the price as low as possible. xD

Wow, this game looks so nice!

Thank you very much!

Any news so far? ^^

Well, things are moving pretty well story-wise. Eli might get another make over though, both story and looks. Just planning to change his hair a bit. xD

[KittyKatStar]

That's good to know. ^^ Thanks for the update.

[RunicV]

@Nische: That's alright, we're all waiting patiently. The estimated release date is somewhere in December, was it...?

Your game was mentioned in English Otome Games' Upcoming Releases. If you have an estimated release date, and a promotional banner/picture, EOG would write a post about your game. Right now, you don't have anything the author of that blog can use as a promotional picture, so maybe that's why your game hasn't been written about. She can't just use the logo, see.

Just thought I'd pop in and say that.