Love at the Laundromat [GxB][Romance, Comedy, Drama] DEMO UP

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GeneDNC
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Re: Love at the Laundromat [GxB][Romance, Comedy][Commercial

#61 Post by GeneDNC »

I haven't been following this closely but it really looks very polished and professional. I like the fact that the protagonists colours tie in with the GUI. I do have a few small nitpicks concerning the GUI though:

The teal colour around the day of the week name should be included around the time stamp circle. For example, include a second thinner teal border around the light one already there. The time stamp seems a little disconnected from the calendar now and I think incorporating that colour may help.

The choice bars unbalance the screen to the left, with those big blue bubbles. A more symmetrical choice bar will make it seem less like the screen's about to fall over, especially since there's already a lot going on on that side of it.

This is all of course IMHO. ^__^

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Nische
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Re: Love at the Laundromat [GxB][Romance, Comedy][Commercial

#62 Post by Nische »

Updated Eli. I changed his nose, a bit of his hair and made his chin less sharper. Is it any better? Or is it not noticeable? D':

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Last edited by Nische on Thu Jul 26, 2012 4:15 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Nische
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Re: Love at the Laundromat [GxB][Romance, Comedy][Commercial

#63 Post by Nische »

GeneDNC wrote:I haven't been following this closely but it really looks very polished and professional. I like the fact that the protagonists colours tie in with the GUI. I do have a few small nitpicks concerning the GUI though:

The teal colour around the day of the week name should be included around the time stamp circle. For example, include a second thinner teal border around the light one already there. The time stamp seems a little disconnected from the calendar now and I think incorporating that colour may help.

The time stamp circle was actually supposed to look like the door of the washing machine. I guess it doesn't really give off that impression though so I can see why you pointed out the fact that it looks disconnected. I'll definitely try and see if adding a thin inner border will help. Thank you so much for the suggestion! I'll post an updated version with edits as soon as I can.
GeneDNC wrote:The choice bars unbalance the screen to the left, with those big blue bubbles. A more symmetrical choice bar will make it seem less like the screen's about to fall over, especially since there's already a lot going on on that side of it.

This is all of course IMHO. ^__^
Do you think it would be better if I put the heavier side on the right rather than orienting the choices to the left? As you said, there are a lot of elements already weighing down the left part of the screen. Maybe switching the weight of the choice would make it better? Or maybe I should just do what you initially suggested and make it more symmetrical, maybe by duplicating and flipping the borders to make sure that both sides weight the same? xD


Again, thank you so much for your honest opinion!
If there's anything else you want to suggest to make this game more appealing, I'd love to hear it!
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Re: Love at the Laundromat [GxB][Romance, Comedy][Commercial

#64 Post by Nische »

[quote="GeneDNC"][/quote]

How are these? :'D

Center:
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Right:
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Center Rounded:
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Time Stamps:
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Re: Love at the Laundromat [GxB][Romance, Comedy][Commercial

#65 Post by Nische »

Just a side by side comparison of old and new spring Eli:

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Not a big difference >_<
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Re: Love at the Laundromat [GxB][Romance, Comedy][Commercial

#66 Post by Artemis Gale »

I haven't said anything yet, but I have been silently following along for a little while.
I personally think that the new changes to Eli make him look a bit more like a man (more mature I guess might be what I mean) instead of a teenager without changing the overall feel of his character. I like it and think it works.

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Re: Love at the Laundromat [GxB][Romance, Comedy][Commercial

#67 Post by lepapillonrouge »

This looks ridiculously good. ovob Good luck!
deviantART
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Re: Love at the Laundromat [GxB][Romance, Comedy][Commercial

#68 Post by Nische »

Artemis Gale wrote:I haven't said anything yet, but I have been silently following along for a little while.
I personally think that the new changes to Eli make him look a bit more like a man (more mature I guess might be what I mean) instead of a teenager without changing the overall feel of his character. I like it and think it works.

I'm so glad! :'D
Thanks for the input!
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Re: Love at the Laundromat [GxB][Romance, Comedy][Commercial

#69 Post by Nische »

lepapillonrouge wrote:This looks ridiculously good. ovob Good luck!

Yay! *A*
Thank you. :')
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Re: Love at the Laundromat [GxB][Romance, Comedy][Commercial

#70 Post by GeneDNC »

Ooo yes, the time stamp looks great. Ah, I see the washing machine motif now that you point it out.

I like the middle one for the choice bar, but it's still bothering me a bit that it looks like it's stuck to the side of the screen like that. However, simply making it perfectly symmetrical is a bit boring, so I did a quick mock-up. Sorry for MSPaint-butchering your image. ^__^'

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Something like that, but you know, better and artsy. ^__^

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Re: Love at the Laundromat [GxB][Romance, Comedy][Commercial

#71 Post by Nische »

Edited and finished Nicholas. I'm not sure if the edit makes him better or worse though. >:

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Opinions?
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Re: Love at the Laundromat [GxB][Romance, Comedy][Commercial

#72 Post by Nische »

GeneDNC wrote:Ooo yes, the time stamp looks great. Ah, I see the washing machine motif now that you point it out.

I like the middle one for the choice bar, but it's still bothering me a bit that it looks like it's stuck to the side of the screen like that. However, simply making it perfectly symmetrical is a bit boring, so I did a quick mock-up. Sorry for MSPaint-butchering your image. ^__^'

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Something like that, but you know, better and artsy. ^__^

Thank you so much for making a reference! xD

Like this?
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Re: Love at the Laundromat [GxB][Romance, Comedy][Commercial

#73 Post by teacup »

I like the new Eli except for his smile. It looks more mischievous and less innocent... maybe because it's slightly crooked, more like a smirk? Just a minor thing, but something so small can totally change the feeling of a character, if you know what I mean. >_<
The new Nicholas seems a lot more like a 'mean guy' xD The first one, I felt, made him just look kind of grumpy, like he wanted to be left alone. The new one, though, makes him look more like he wants to... hurt someone, lol. Probably because his eyebrows are arched more inward, which is a typical thing for expressing anger, as I'm sure you know. I do like his change though, it definitely made him look older (in a good way!). But why did you change of his pretty green eyes? ;-;
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Re: Love at the Laundromat [GxB][Romance, Comedy][Commercial

#74 Post by Arcanum »

I'm in utter *love* with the new Nicholas. First, he looked - yes - kinda grumpy and a tad emo. Now he just looks so mature and sexy *g* (Also noticed the ~crotch~ *coughcough*) As for Eli, I kinda liked the old nose better, but then, as much as I love the sexy and mature kind of look (that suits Nicholas so well *g*), I like cute guys as well <3

I also like the new look of the choice menu!

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Re: Love at the Laundromat [GxB][Romance, Comedy][Commercial

#75 Post by Nische »

teacup wrote:I like the new Eli except for his smile. It looks more mischievous and less innocent... maybe because it's slightly crooked, more like a smirk? Just a minor thing, but something so small can totally change the feeling of a character, if you know what I mean. >_<
The new Nicholas seems a lot more like a 'mean guy' xD The first one, I felt, made him just look kind of grumpy, like he wanted to be left alone. The new one, though, makes him look more like he wants to... hurt someone, lol. Probably because his eyebrows are arched more inward, which is a typical thing for expressing anger, as I'm sure you know. I do like his change though, it definitely made him look older (in a good way!). But why did you change of his pretty green eyes? ;-;


I unfurrowed his brows. Is this better? o:
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We thought that grey eyes made him look more refined and serious *A*
Does green fit him more though? >:
Here's what it looks like on the new Nicholas:
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Here's Eli with a fixed smile? xD
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