Lemma Soft Forums

Plot:This game takes place in the time before the Humans were on Earth.In this game,you play as an ambassador from the Human kingdom attempting to convince the Elemental kingdoms to unite with the Human kingdom.You are given 4 months to accomplish this, so you must spend your time equally in the kingdoms and must do the things the monarchs want you to do.
Characters:
You:You can choose your name and gender in this game.Though you can choose what you say and such,this usually just affects other characters and not your personality.You grew up in and orphanage until the royal family adopted you.

Earth:The eccentric,stubborn Element who loves to party!

Air:The mysterious Element who is very sneaky and seems to hate everyone.

Fire:The hard-headed and short-tempered Element who hates Water.

Water:The passive-aggressive Element who hates Fire.

Your female friend:You get to choose her name.She loves caring for the needy and doesn't like it when her brother restricts her from doing so.

Your male friend:You get to choose his name.He's the king of the Human kingdom and is overprotective of his sister.

Art:I don't have the time to make sprites and backgrounds for this,so I had to go on the internet and look for art.(It sucks that I had to do that but....)
Writing:Most of it is done.
Music:Almost done.
Process:15%

This will be a free game,since I know it's hard to get money these days,and besides,I'm using someone else' s art,so...

Oh,and I do need beta testers,but only if you're willing to.

I wanted criticism on this ,mostly on the plot and what I should do.I really want tips and hints on what to do and how,and how to make it better.This is my first visual novel,so when I make the next one(I hope)I want it to better than this one.

So,I suppose that's it!Now like I said,this is my first visual novel so...*opens teary eyes* POUND ME WITH THE BEST CRITICISM YOU'VE GOT.

Hey, uh, I noticed one of the sprites you're using is of Isabella from don't take it personally babe, it just ain't your story, and I'm fairly certain that her sprite is not Creative Commons.

Instead, I would suggest maybe taking sprites from the Creative Commons section of the forum?

Actually, those sprites *are* available for use. They were not originally created for DTIPB, you can buy them in sprite packs (and they may be free for free games, I'm not sure. But they're definitely available under non-exclusive licenses.)

The issue of people 'recognising' them as other characters may distract players though.

Yeah, I've seen those sprites used all over the place. They're even being used in some commercial games.

papillon wrote:Actually, those sprites *are* available for use. They were not originally created for DTIPB, you can buy them in sprite packs (and they may be free for free games, I'm not sure. But they're definitely available under non-exclusive licenses.)

The issue of people 'recognising' them as other characters may distract players though.

Ah, I did not know that. Thanks for clearing that up, and sorry for not researching it beforehand.

Good luck on your game! I found the romance combos you listed quite interesting (usually you'll have one, two or four different kinds of romance to pursue, three is uncommon as far as I know).

Victoria Jennings wrote:

papillon wrote:Actually, those sprites *are* available for use. They were not originally created for DTIPB, you can buy them in sprite packs (and they may be free for free games, I'm not sure. But they're definitely available under non-exclusive licenses.)

The issue of people 'recognising' them as other characters may distract players though.

Ah, I did not know that. Thanks for clearing that up, and sorry for not researching it beforehand.

Good luck on your game! I found the romance combos you listed quite interesting (usually you'll have one, two or four different kinds of romance to pursue, three is uncommon as far as I know).

Thanks,I need it.