Era of Monsters [GxB][Fantasy, Romance, Comedy][Demo]

[TheOneTwo]

This looks so awesome!
Is this commercial?
I hope it's not. XD
Poor high school girl here...

[nancie]

I usually just silently stalk game ideas that interest me, but this one really caught my attention. A strong willed protagonist with thoughts and ideas of her own is a definite plus for me, also love the fantasy element. Your art work is quite eye pleasing and the story premise is intriguing. This is a project I would even be willing to lend a hand in if you need some help with story line, writing, editing, or even beta testing. (not that I think your story idea needs any help but I think the size of your project is quite ambitious for just one person)
As for your questions:
1.) Are you interested in playing the game when it's completed?
--Absolutely

2.) Is a dominant witch acceptable as a protagonist for you?
--Yes

3.)Nobody loves a complete bitch, I know…
--I think most people have the bad girl/boy fantasy so as long as it flows well with the story dialogue I LOVE this. I also like the suggestion made earlier of allowing the reader to choose a varying level of bitchiness in responses especially if you make it consequential to how each character reacts to what she says.

4.)Just want to see opinions and maybe get some advice on what I have to be careful with.
--Its your story so write it in a way that you are happy with. If you disclose that some material may be offensive to a more conservative audience than I think you are ok here.

5.) Is characters design OK?
--I like them, I like that you have mapped out how the characters fit together and relationships between them. I like the variety of arc-types and that they are not all in love with the MC by default. The art work is nice too.

6.) Is here something irritating you?
--You will most definitely need a proofreader but everything else looks great so far.

7.) Initially I wanted to make a decent 18+ game. I`m focusing on the plot, the characters and romance now. I`m OK anyway either way if stuff like this is in game or not.
--This is your story write it the way you like. If you are concerned you will have less of an audience then make the adult content toggle-able in the options or as suggested earlier make two versions. I'm not opposed to the idea, and if it is well written and tasteful I would encourage it.

8.) But the adult part of the forum is so unpopular… and dead. What do you think? Is porny part distract you from a story?
--Depends on how it it written, -Porn or "one handed games" have place on this side of the forums. I am not against this by any means but they have their own section for a reason. That being said a bit of erotica or love scenes with more that just kissing are fine for most people as long as it is clearly disclosed before playing, and again making that content toggle-able it strongly advisable.

9.) And sorry for my horrible, simply disgusting English . I`m learning it at university now. I even have to write script in my natural language at first and translate it after this. I have to think about working with narrative speakers as a co-writer to make the text in game understandable… if a person with knowledge of the language gets interest in working on the project. I don`t know if it will happen.
--I understood your post just fine so its not as bad as you may think, but you could use a bit of proofreading. Understanding that you need help is a huge step in the right direction, I find it very admirable that you want to make it well written and with proper english. I have already stated that I would be happy to help if you want it. I am a native english speaker with plenty of time and I love what I've seen so far of the project so feel free to contact me if you so choose.

10.)I`ll do my best to make this game enjoyable not only for me, so please answer! It`s my first project and I work alone now, but I don`t want to make a game nobody want to play.
-- I know that this was not intended as a question but I felt the need to comment, Not everyone is going to like every game so it would be unrealistic to try to please everyone. So just relax and write something that you will be proud of. I have no doubt that this will spark a healthy following.

[Merula O]

9-of-Hearts, Virelai,
Thank you for comments! Yeah, cute maids are cute.

TheOneTwo,
Now I think it likely will be free...

nancie,
Wow, thank you for the comment! It`s nice to see that some people intrested in the project so much. Thank you very much for your offering of help! If you still will be intrested, I`ll be happy to have you as a beta-tester, but it will be later. At the moment one kind person is already editing some part of the script for me. But I won`t forget about you and I`ll need more help later
Oh, I understand that I can`t please everyone, of course! Nobody can. I meant I want to make a game what some people (not everyone, but who is intrested in ganre) will find entertaining.

Oh, I think I forget to say... So, what I have done: I already have completed script for the common path, Drake`s, Theo`s, Kuon`s, secret character`s routes. And Malik`s one is in the process. It`s all in my mother language (gah... so much work, translation...). I`m slowly programming the demo. Made everyone blinks.
And God, nobody wants to say a word about GUI . I wasted an eternity making it work, posted screenshots - and no one wants to say if textbox of font look OK or something... well, I forget to ask first, OK. But I`m really interested...

[nancie]

And God, nobody wants to say a word about GUI . I wasted an eternity making it work, posted screenshots - and no one wants to say if textbox of font look OK or something... well, I forget to ask first, OK. But I`m really interested...

I think the GUI and the text box looks amazing. The colors are nice and contrast well with the game. The font is readable but small, if you are going to have standard screen size then I would make it a bit bigger but if you are going with a larger screen it will probably look fine.

[Merula O]

nancie,
thank you for the fast answer! The screen size is 1024x576 and the font looks better. So it`s ok in the whole...

[Flowers from Nowhere]

I have a big dislike of GxB games because the protagonist is always a useless, uninteresting, cutesy, clumsy girl!

Me too. When I play a game I want the protagonist to be a character I would actually enjoy being. Uselessness and/or no character traits need not apply.

This game looks outstanding. You have a strong protagonist with a plot that really has her in its grip. Your artwork and GUI are beautiful and I would love to play it.

On 18+:
I enjoy smut, even if I don't talk about it much, and refer you OokamiKasumi's Making Adult Visual Novels for Women found here http://darkeroticagames.blogspot.com/20 ... isual.html just in case it's new information for you.

Write the story you want to read. It sounds like one I will enjoy.

[Merula O]

Flowers from Nowhere,
thank you! Wah, my game idea was called outstanding I`m so happy now and want to make a really good game!
You know, I played many VNs - japanese ones and not, otome, eroge, nakige... I love them (espetially otome, just becouse I`m a girl), but not everything in them. I just made a list of things I HATE and of things I LIKE - and started creating a story I want to read. I have fun making this game. First thing I hate - faceless carpet-chan as protagonist. So I have Neyris now. I hate with passion abuse in relationships (for some reason in japanese games for girls it is showed as a good thing WHA-). So no of this garbage in my game. Let those games be, but I don`t want to watch it and oh no I`ll ever write it, it`s my personal opinion. The characters can say some rude things to each other, have quarrels - it happens. But abuse from a lover - no-no.
...why did I write this wall of text? I have no diary and I hope people will understand what to expect from the project better.

Oh, yes, I did my research and read this opinion, it`s great.
So... two version of the game is a good idea, I think?

Edit: What did just happen?.. I wrote all the massege, but the part dissapeared...

[TheOneTwo]

It's free?!
Yay!! Yay!! XD

[VocaloidsRCool]

I am interested in playing your game. It looks fun. I like the idea of playing a witch. Seeing the world through the mind of a villain is intriguing. It would be nice if the witch had a cruel playfulness, and a sarcastic, witty side. The character designs are perfect, please do not change them. I like the concept of the game, and the character art. I don't like 18+ games, this game is nice without sexual content. Those are just a few of my thoughts. THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR MAKING THIS GAME IN ENGLISH. I REALLY APPRECIATE IT!

[Merula O]

Really good thing happened, guys! Thanks to Anomandaris I have a readable script for demo now. The game doesn`t have my horrible English anymore.
So work is still going on.

VocaloidsRCool
Thank you for liking it and for your opinion!

I`m still working at backgrounds. It`s strange that some of them look horrible and others are kind of cool. I`ll show some here.
A library

And Neyris` room


These are the most good-looking ones.
What do you think about the backgrounds? I`d like to hear advice and critic.

[nancie]

I think both backgrounds look great, maybe you should post the ones you are not sure about so we can see them to compare.
I look forward to the demo so keep up the good work!!

[Merula O]

nancie, OK
Oh, I think I just was lazy or something when I was making them



I'm bad at architecture...

[nancie]

These are not bad, I like them. The colors are nice and the art is very pleasing. I think this is just a case where you are your own worst critic. The nice thing about backgrounds is that they are exactly that, the focus will be the sprites for the most part. So don't stress too much they look very nice.

[Merula O]

Really? Thank you! Then I`ll continue working at next one not so stressing about them. But maybe I`ll return to them later.

[TheOneTwo]

I don't think you suck at it.
It's pretty. Honestly.