Anxiety Composition [Horror AV Novel]

[intestinal-parasit3]

Hi, I just wanted to share a new series I was working on.
I was a huge fan of the Knifepoint Horror AV novel adaptions, and I was really bummed when the project ended. So,I decided to make my own horror series, but with my own writing (and maybe other people's writing, if anybody wants to collaborate). I just finished writing the first "episode", but I haven't added music or sound effects yet. I'm also considering adding a host character, kinda like the Crypt Keeper.

I decided to post it here to see if people like the direction it's going, or if changes need to be made. Please tell me what you think.

Episode one is called "Unbelievable" and is about a university student who participates in a very unusual research project.


So... please let me know what you think.

Edit: Almost forgot, the the story contains a fair amount of blood and gore. So... warnings for that.

***************Edit2: First episode finished and posted in the completed games section***************

[jellybi]

This looked promising to me! I thought it could have used a bit more meta text with the narrator sharing his reactions as he encounters stories with common threads (like humans or organs who seem to remain alive after death) and maybe actively beginning to pursue those stories, since it feels like he collected quite a lot of similar ones when maybe it would make more sense for the average stories to be random and non-creepy until he started going after the creepy ones deliberately somehow, maybe because he's started to wonder if they're real and wants to solve the mystery.

Generally speaking the individual stories were intriguing, but after a while I started to wonder where the overall story was "going" without any interpretation or reaction from the narrator as I mentioned above.

I also had trouble following (what appeared to be) the twist in the ending and couldn't quite tell what you were going for there. I did find the backgrounds dropping off to a black BG to be rather creepy and it set the mood well for a twist, if I had understood what the twist was.

[intestinal-parasit3]

Wow, thanks for the thorough run down jellybi! Yeah, looking back I probably didn't have enough input from the narrator, I have already gotten most of the voice acting for this one, so it's probably too late to change it, but maybe I could do a sequel to this one someday.

As for the ending, it wasn't really meant to be a "twist" per se, just more weirdness up for the viewer to interpret however they want.
I'm glad you see potential in it. The fully voiced version should be out within a few days.