Asphyxia [GxG]

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ebi-hime
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Asphyxia [GxG]

#1 Post by ebi-hime » Sat Jun 13, 2015 10:21 pm

Asphyxia

Brief synopsis:
Asphyxia is a relatively short (around 65k) visual novel with choices and multiple endings based loosely around the real lives of various British Romantic poets. The story is set in the modern day, but the writing is rather ornate to suit the ‘Romantic poet’ theme. The game will be commercial.

Story:
Samantha is depressed. She’s been depressed for a long time, almost as long as she can remember, but it’s slowly been getting worse.
She thought Lillian was her friend, her best friend. Perhaps she even thought of her as more than that.
Why, then, did their relationship have to fall apart? Was it really her fault? She didn’t do anything wrong. At least, she didn’t intend to.
Now, three months later, Samantha finally has her chance. Forced together on their geography field trip to the Lake District, will she finally be able to repair her relationship with Lillian – or will it collapse all over again?

Characters:

Image
Samantha Taylor Coleridge
Based on Samuel Taylor Coleridge.
A girl who enjoys talking, but often gets carried away with her own ideas. Conversations with her have a tendency of becoming rather one-sided.
She’s been depressed lately, and has been a lot quieter than usual. Her reasoning is, what's the point in performing when Lillian isn't there to appreciate it?
She has low self-esteem and can be very clingy – unhealthily so. Maybe this is a side effect of being the youngest daughter of such a large family.

Image
Lillian Wordsworth
Based on William Wordsworth.
An aloof girl who doesn’t get too close to others – not even to her supposed ‘best friends’.
She is mature for her age and dispenses good advice to others, but often does it so bluntly those she tries to help get upset. That never seems to bother Lillian, however.
She is incredibly close to her younger brother, Theodore, whom she hasn't seen in several years.

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Tabitha De Quincey
Based on Thomas De Quincey.
Lillian’s self-proclaimed biggest fan, De Quincey is a strange girl who follows Lillian around like an over-eager puppy.
She has fairly macabre interests, and often talks about serious subject matters in a disconcertingly offhand manner.
She has a good deal in common with Samantha, and the two are rather close friends – or at least, they were. Now, after an unfortunate incident Samantha would rather not recall, Samantha tries to avoid her.

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Roberta Southey
Based on Robert Southey.
One of Samantha’s oldest, closest friends. Roberta is a sensible girl who places a great deal of faith in the rules, and invariably gets angry when people break them.
She often gets frustrated with Samantha, but cares for her a great deal.
She tries to act as cool and aloof as Lillian, but always caves in and gets angry/embarrassed when people (particularly Georgia) start making fun of her.

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Georgia Byron
Based on Lord Byron.
A general nuisance who derives great pleasure from making other people (particularly Roberta) unhappy.
She says all kinds of outrageous things she doesn’t truly believe just to offend other people, so it’s often difficult to tell what she really thinks.
She is a genuine lady, coming from a well-connected family, and takes great pride in this fact. Sadly, her title is nothing more than mere decoration, as her family is almost destitute.

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Persephone Shelley
Based on Percy Shelley.
A girl who, at first glance, seems to be shy and softly spoken. However, when brought onto the topics of women’s rights, the meat industry, or police brutality, she can become very outspoken.
She’s an optimistic do-gooder who attempts to convert others to her own ideals, often without success. Nevertheless, she refuses to give in – which is nothing short of a miracle, considering the cynical and misanthropic Georgia is her best, perhaps only, friend.
She used to be bullied quite badly but now, given her friendship with Georgia, nobody dares to say a bad word against her. Not to her face, anyway.

Image
Alexandra Pope
Based on Alexander Pope.
A bitter English teacher who bemoans the fact she has to act as a chaperone on the year 12's geography trip. Why? She doesn’t even teach geography.
Miss Pope is incredibly, unusually short, but more than makes up for her lack of height with her gleeful sadism and caustic comments.
Why she became a teacher is something of a mystery, but most assume she did it in order to make as many of her students' lives as miserable as possible.

Screenshots:

Image

Image

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Credits:
Writing, programming: Ebi-hime
Art: Sillyselly
SFX: Sounddogs
Music: Various places

Extra:
At the moment, the writing for the game is more or less finished. All the text has been written, and it’s all been proofread, though a few more rounds of proofreading probably won’t hurt. The art and GUI, however, isn’t finished, and might take a couple of months.
This story is also something of a continuation of a previous, free KN I wrote a few months ago, Dejection: An Ode, which also that turns Romantic poets into cute girls. Asphyxia, however, is set in a more modern universe, while Dejection was set in the late 18th century. The writing styles of both stories, however, are very similar (3rd person and somewhat fancy), and so is the subject matter. If you want to know whether you would enjoy this story or not, it might be a good idea to play Dejection. You can DL it here~

If you have any questions, feel free to ask me here, on on twitter, or tumblr, or... anywhere, really : >
I have a lot of free & commercial VNs available on Steam here if you want to check them out! ☆

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Re: Asphyxia [GxG]

#2 Post by wererat42 » Sun Jun 14, 2015 1:36 am

Character art looks really nice.

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Re: Asphyxia [GxG]

#3 Post by Joshua1207 » Sun Jun 14, 2015 2:23 am

The art looks beautiful and GxG is always a good thing. Story sounds interesting as well, I'll keep my eyes on this.
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Re: Asphyxia [GxG]

#4 Post by papillon » Sun Jun 14, 2015 7:57 am

... they're all so cute...

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Re: Asphyxia [GxG]

#5 Post by ebi-hime » Sun Jun 14, 2015 3:09 pm

Thank you for the comments. My artist is so talented... She draws such cute girls.
And she redrew the sprites 3 times because she wasn't happy with the earlier ones, haha XD
I have a lot of free & commercial VNs available on Steam here if you want to check them out! ☆

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Re: Asphyxia [GxG]

#6 Post by Smudgeed » Tue Jun 16, 2015 8:40 am

This looks like just the kind of thing I'll like. Cute art, British poets...what more could anyone ask for? I'm really interested in the concept and as a poetry lover and I will definitely be checking this out.

Though I feel like I may end up hating a few characters because of the poets they are based off of (ewww Wordsworth and Pope), and then liking others more (come to me Southey).

I'm looking forward to see how you base these off the lives of the poets. l'm glad they are loosly based off of them though, the heartbreak Anette must have felt...why Wordsworth...why..

I have a question though: do you have an idea what platform you plan on releasing this through? Will you be using steam?

And I had no clue you had a game like this out already, I'll be checking out Dejection as well.

Good luck on this project :)
Last edited by Smudgeed on Wed Jun 17, 2015 9:34 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Asphyxia [GxG]

#7 Post by ebi-hime » Tue Jun 16, 2015 10:56 am

@ smudgeed

Ooh, and I'm glad I found somebody else who likes Romantics. To be honest I'm more interested in their personal lives than their poetry because I'm nosy. There are a few references to their poems in the story as well, though.

I don't like Wordsworth either. He just sounds like such a jerk... He even comes across as a jerk in his own poetry... So Lilly's also meant to be something of a jerk XD

Since this story makes everyone around 17, I couldn't represent all their real life experiences, so I didn't mention any of Wordsworth's experiences in France. I also altered some stuff too, to make it fit the story better. I hope people who really know their Romantics don't mind... and people who don't can still enjoy it n_n;

I think the game will be released on Steam. I know a lot of people don't like Steam though (I don't use it very much), so maybe I could see about releasing it elsewhere, too.

Thank you for your comment, I hope you enjoy the finished game if you play it n_n;
I have a lot of free & commercial VNs available on Steam here if you want to check them out! ☆

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Re: Asphyxia [GxG]

#8 Post by Smudgeed » Wed Jun 17, 2015 9:34 am

Haha no their personal lives are pretty interesting too but I'll be looking out for those references to their works.

I'm glad I'm not the only one that thinks Wordsworth is a bit of jerk :)

Yeah well it'd be kinda strange if Lily went off and got someone pregnant haha I wouldn't say I really know my Romantics but I don't mind that at all! I'm very interested I seeing how you do it!

Ah, Steam is a fine platform for me, but I can also understand why people don't like it. However, I can tell you that regardless of where you release it..I will get it. 100%. I played through Dejection and I loved it, so I can tell I'll like this too.

Again, good luck! I'll be eagerly waiting!
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Re: Asphyxia [GxG]

#9 Post by Rinima » Wed Jun 17, 2015 11:18 am

I have to say, I'm really looking forward to this project coming out, I quite like poets (thanks GCSE's, thanks...)

And I was really happy to find out it was based in the Lake District (I have family up there, it's a really nice area), and art is ultra pretty as well~
Last edited by Rinima on Wed Jun 17, 2015 11:43 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Asphyxia [GxG]

#10 Post by Mad Harlequin » Wed Jun 17, 2015 11:19 am

This sounds like a really neat concept! And as others have already said, the art is lovely. :)

Best of luck!
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Re: Asphyxia [GxG]

#11 Post by P_Nova » Wed Jun 17, 2015 1:29 pm

Uwah ! So cute ! I'm not acknowledgeable in foreign poet (as a french !) Have you planned an extra page with a quick presentation of the poets itself ???

It would be very interesting in your game !
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Re: Asphyxia [GxG]

#12 Post by ebi-hime » Thu Jun 18, 2015 10:44 am

@ smudgeed
A lot of the poets are so interesting, they had such troubled lives... It's interesting to read about : >
I don't think you're the only one who thinks that, haha. Actually, my seminar tutor on Romantics in university really, really hated Wordsworth...
I'm glad you liked Dejection! The writing style is very similar, so if you like one you will probably like the other n_n;

@ Rinima
I had to study Wordsworth and Coleridge in GCSE too, but at that time I didn't realise how moe Coleridge truly is... I regret I hadn't made this discovery back then, because I probably would have enjoyed studying them a lot more.
It's set in the Lake District because lots of the Romantics lived there, and Wordsworth was also born there : >

@ Mad Harlequin
Thank you! My artist is so talented... She made my character designs look so preeetty o:

@ P_Nova
Yes, there is an extras page with autobiographical information about the poets themselves! I think maybe I wrote too much, since all the auobiographical information together comes up to about 6k words or something n_n;; The extras page only unlocks after the player has done one playthrough of the story, but maybe I should set it so it's accessible from the beginning, so people can read about the real people first. But a lot of the autobiographical details will spoil what happens, so I'm undecided.
The page looks like this at the moment:

Image

Though it's bigger than that ingame XD
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Re: Asphyxia [GxG]

#13 Post by Mad Harlequin » Thu Jun 18, 2015 12:07 pm

I don't know if it's just the screenshot tricking my eyes, but it looks like the text colors for the biographies might be hard to read. Are you using gray and white?
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Re: Asphyxia [GxG]

#14 Post by ebi-hime » Thu Jun 18, 2015 12:27 pm

Mad Harlequin wrote:I don't know if it's just the screenshot tricking my eyes, but it looks like the text colors for the biographies might be hard to read. Are you using gray and white?
It's white text on a semi-transparent light blue background. The text has a black outline though, so it should stand out enough.
The image I posted was shrunk, as lemma seems not to allow for images about 800px wide to be posted. The fullsize image looks like this, though.

Do you think it's easy enough to read?
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Re: Asphyxia [GxG]

#15 Post by Joshua1207 » Thu Jun 18, 2015 12:32 pm

Its readable but it is a tad harsh on the eyes.
http://lemmasoft.renai.us/forums/viewto ... 11&t=15674
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