Lonely Hearts Club (Otome, Romance, Drama) dropped

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LadyOfGatsby
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Lonely Hearts Club (Otome, Romance, Drama) dropped

#1 Post by LadyOfGatsby »

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(Otome, Romance, Drama)

“It is only with true love and compassion that we can begin to mend what is broken in the world. It is these two blessed things that can begin to heal all broken hearts.” -Steve Maraboli

Story
Quinn Hart is a 26 year old who seems to have it all. A loving family, a stable job, and the perfect boyfriend. She fell in love four years ago and was going to get married to the love of her life. Everything in her life was going well. At least that's how it seemed...Until Quinn discovered that her boyfriend had been cheating on her. Heartbroken, the world around her begins to slowly fall apart. This is a simple story about broken hearts, recovery, and finding true love. Join the lonely hearts club if you are feeling heartbroken as well...

About
The lonely hearts club is a short noncommercial game, aimed towards the female audience. It is a simple visual novel, without much complexity going on. This game will explore relatable relationships, character depth, and attempt an engaging story. It's aim is to be realistic and enjoyable. The main part of the game is about attending the club and getting closer to the other characters that have similar experiences. As well as going through Quinn's recovery process in the game, you also have a chance to go through all of the characters and obtain two endings from each. There will be a lot of romantic scenarios and drama throughout the story.

Characters
Quinn Hart (name changeable)
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Cause of broken heart: cheating boyfriend.
Quinn is a mature and outspoken woman, who seems tough on the outside but is actually very fragile on the inside. She is sincere and puts in a lot of effort in almost everything she does. After giving up on a four year relationship, her heart has become guarded and bitter.

Leo Devereux
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Cause of broken heart: his wife left him.
Leo is the beloved romance novelist, torn between an endless writer's block and a broken marriage. Usually, he gives off an air of arrogance and has a lot of bad habits. Although he may come off as unapproachable, he is actually kind. Deep down, he is vulnerable and seeks comfort.

Dante Wolfe
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Cause of broken heart: the woman he loves is dating another man.
Dante is a mysterious gentleman, with a flashy taste in fashion. He's laid back and carefree, the type that seems to have no worries. Even the ladies seem to love his company but he only has his sights set on one woman, who now loves another. His heart can't break free, unable to move on.

Harvey Blair
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Cause of broken heart: taking a break from his marriage.
Harvey is a well educated and open minded man. He’s a serious individual, honest and direct in everything he says. Despite how he seems, Harvey also has a fun and wild side to him, as well as a dark past. His marriage is in danger of falling apart, leaving him with broken pieces that can either stay broken or become fixed.

Progress
Outline: 100%
Script: 0%
Sprite 4/4: 100%
Gui: 0%
CGs 0/???
Music 6/???
Backgrounds 27/???

Features
Free to play
6 different endings, consisting of a bad ending and a happy ending.
At least 10,000 to 30,000+ words for each route (Just an estimation)

Credits
Sprites- MikiTakamoto http://mikitakamoto.deviantart.com/
Music- Free Music
Free Backgrounds-Derpinc, Vixeria, Afiniwind, Spocar, shijmi, big globe, ハローハロー, chocolate berry, SashaPure-D, joeian, xenocracy, yuninaoki, sei chan
writer- stravolto

Questions
What do you think of the plot?
Which character seems interesting to you?
Any critique or suggestions?
Please let me know what you think, any feedback would be helpful!
Last edited by LadyOfGatsby on Wed Sep 09, 2015 3:21 am, edited 71 times in total.
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Re: Lonely Hearts Club (Otome, Romance, Drama)

#2 Post by kawaii_penguin »

I think the plot sounds nice I've never actually seen a visual novel that's focused on this kind of variable.

The characters are intriguing and have a nice story to them but their also all very relatable in their own special ways.

I can't think of any suggestions off the top of my head at the moment but everything seem nice so far! :)

It seems to have an interesting story and an interesting cast of characters. I'd really like to see it when you're done! :) ~ Olivia

Ps I know I'm no professional critique or anything but I'm just going to say it looks good so far and I'd be interested to play it when your finished. Keep up the good work! :)

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Re: Lonely Hearts Club (Otome, Romance, Drama)

#3 Post by LadyOfGatsby »

kawaii_penguin wrote:I think the plot sounds nice I've never actually seen a visual novel that's focused on this kind of variable.

The characters are intriguing and have a nice story to them but their also all very relatable in their own special ways.

I can't think of any suggestions off the top of my head at the moment but everything seem nice so far! :)

It seems to have an interesting story and an interesting cast of characters. I'd really like to see it when you're done! :) ~ Olivia

Ps I know I'm no professional critique or anything but I'm just going to say it looks good so far and I'd be interested to play it when your finished. Keep up the good work! :)
Thanks so much for your feedback! Professional or not, I really appreciate it. I will keep up the good work and do hope you play it whenever it's finished.
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Re: Lonely Hearts Club (Otome, Romance, Drama)

#4 Post by LadyOfGatsby »

The sketches have been added!
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Re: Lonely Hearts Club (Otome, Romance, Drama)

#5 Post by sherberrie »

What do you think of the plot?

For a otome game based heavily on the romance, it's okay! I like it when the plot is not too time-consuming in a game about romance because I like to focus on pursuing the character.

Which character seems interesting to you?

I'm very shallow- I always go for the one I think is most attractive looking first. :lol: In that case, I like Leo. But, personality-wise, I like Harvey. I like those serious characters that have a secret silly side to them~

Any critique or suggestions?

Well, to start off, I love your art! As an artist myself, I love to play games that are aesthetically pleasing, so your art really contributes to my overall view. And since this is your first game, how long are you planning to make it (in hours)? I've heard its bad to make your first game very long/complicated, and with all two routes for each character AND a common route (not to mention all those CGs), I'd suggest you to be careful.

I'm looking forward to seeing how this project turns out. Good luck!

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Re: Lonely Hearts Club (Otome, Romance, Drama)

#6 Post by annpan »

Can I say how happy I am about this game XD? The protag has my name Quinn. OMG

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Re: Lonely Hearts Club (Otome, Romance, Drama)

#7 Post by LadyOfGatsby »

sherberrie wrote:What do you think of the plot?

For a otome game based heavily on the romance, it's okay! I like it when the plot is not too time-consuming in a game about romance because I like to focus on pursuing the character.

Which character seems interesting to you?

I'm very shallow- I always go for the one I think is most attractive looking first. :lol: In that case, I like Leo. But, personality-wise, I like Harvey. I like those serious characters that have a secret silly side to them~

Any critique or suggestions?

Well, to start off, I love your art! As an artist myself, I love to play games that are aesthetically pleasing, so your art really contributes to my overall view. And since this is your first game, how long are you planning to make it (in hours)? I've heard its bad to make your first game very long/complicated, and with all two routes for each character AND a common route (not to mention all those CGs), I'd suggest you to be careful.

I'm looking forward to seeing how this project turns out. Good luck!
Thanks so much :) Yes, I also think it's bad to make the game complicated or too long, I'll keep that in mind. However the plot is pretty simple and I will make sure to keep it medium length. I probably won't have many CGs, probably only in the actual routes and not much of a complex common route. Again, thanks and I'll be careful.
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Re: Lonely Hearts Club (Otome, Romance, Drama)

#8 Post by LadyOfGatsby »

annpan wrote:Can I say how happy I am about this game XD? The protag has my name Quinn. OMG
Haha, that's seriously awesome XD
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Re: Lonely Hearts Club (Otome, Romance, Drama)

#9 Post by Googaboga »

What do you think of the plot?

I think it's neat. I like when the main characters are all in a group or club or something together :]. Drama is generally not my genre of choice, but I'd like to give it a try.

Which character seems interesting to you?

Probably Quinn? I like Dante's design the most though X3.

Any critique or suggestions?

Not really anything specific at this point, just general kinds of things like; don't let yourself get overwhelmed, it's better to make it smaller than deal with that.

Please let me know what you think, any feedback would be helpful!

I think this seems cool and I wish you good luck on everything :>.
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Re: Lonely Hearts Club (Otome, Romance, Drama)

#10 Post by LadyOfGatsby »

Googaboga wrote:What do you think of the plot?

I think it's neat. I like when the main characters are all in a group or club or something together :]. Drama is generally not my genre of choice, but I'd like to give it a try.

Which character seems interesting to you?

Probably Quinn? I like Dante's design the most though X3.

Any critique or suggestions?

Not really anything specific at this point, just general kinds of things like; don't let yourself get overwhelmed, it's better to make it smaller than deal with that.

Please let me know what you think, any feedback would be helpful!

I think this seems cool and I wish you good luck on everything :>.
thank you! I'm gonna follow your advice and aim for shorter goals since this is my first game :)
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Re: Lonely Hearts Club (Otome, Romance, Drama)

#11 Post by Lady_Luck94 »

What do you think of the plot?

From the synopsis, I must say I love it. Really LOVE it. <3

Which character seems interesting to you?

I for one, is a lover of realistic protagonist <3 Whenever I find a story with the main character acting like a stereotype shoujo manga heroine(cry too much, optimistic to a fault, or even emotional like there's no tomorrow), I find it hard to relate to myself (yeah, I'm insensitive *slapped). But, of course the game will still be fun to play, but I won't go back to play it the second time.

For the love interest ; Personality wise, I must say I love carefree guy, so Dante is my number one. :> Appearance wise is Leo <3
And background wise will be Harvey, so when the game is released, I'll probably go after Harvey first. No I don't have any sorts of fetish with married men. Maybe 8)


Any critique or suggestions?

Not really one to give since, I never made any VN before ( but I do have plan to make one since its one of my many dreams ) The only thing I can do is ranting like I does above :D

Please let me know what you think, any feedback would be helpful!

I think this realistic slice of life VN will surely be a splendid read ! <3 Hope you all the best!
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Re: Lonely Hearts Club (Otome, Romance, Drama)

#12 Post by LadyOfGatsby »

Lady_Luck94 wrote:What do you think of the plot?

From the synopsis, I must say I love it. Really LOVE it. <3

Which character seems interesting to you?

I for one, is a lover of realistic protagonist <3 Whenever I find a story with the main character acting like a stereotype shoujo manga heroine(cry too much, optimistic to a fault, or even emotional like there's no tomorrow), I find it hard to relate to myself (yeah, I'm insensitive *slapped). But, of course the game will still be fun to play, but I won't go back to play it the second time.

For the love interest ; Personality wise, I must say I love carefree guy, so Dante is my number one. :> Appearance wise is Leo <3
And background wise will be Harvey, so when the game is released, I'll probably go after Harvey first. No I don't have any sorts of fetish with married men. Maybe 8)


Any critique or suggestions?

Not really one to give since, I never made any VN before ( but I do have plan to make one since its one of my many dreams ) The only thing I can do is ranting like I does above :D

Please let me know what you think, any feedback would be helpful!

I think this realistic slice of life VN will surely be a splendid read ! <3 Hope you all the best!
Thanks so much for the feedback, glad to know someone is also trying to make their own vn haha. I'm also a beginner and having your support means a lot!
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Re: Lonely Hearts Club (Otome, Romance, Drama)

#13 Post by Qeedy »

uh hello!

Questions
What do you think of the plot?
It seems interesting, since they all have their own problem in love and need someone to comfort them. I-it's not i got brokenheart or something! xD

Which character seems interesting to you?
I'm just your fetish megane-kun so it must be Harvey xD following that leo and dante. It just dante is not my type.

Any critique or suggestions?
Well, i'm not use to critize something since i never make one, so i don't know what to tell you. sorry

Please let me know what you think, any feedback would be helpful!
It's hard for me imagine how they will encounter each other. will they go to the place call "lonely hearts club"? i think it will be awkward for man going such place... but i leave it until the demos is out ^^
And thing that make me really-really looking forward this one is the art! Yeah they so cool! It's not just because their drawing like anime or manga the the coloring and proportion is so good that i don't have any complain. But Quinn eyes are yellow so i think she resemble a cat .-.

looking forward this project ^^

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Re: Lonely Hearts Club (Otome, Romance, Drama)

#14 Post by LadyOfGatsby »

Qeedy wrote:uh hello!

Questions
What do you think of the plot?
It seems interesting, since they all have their own problem in love and need someone to comfort them. I-it's not i got brokenheart or something! xD

Which character seems interesting to you?
I'm just your fetish megane-kun so it must be Harvey xD following that leo and dante. It just dante is not my type.

Any critique or suggestions?
Well, i'm not use to critize something since i never make one, so i don't know what to tell you. sorry

Please let me know what you think, any feedback would be helpful!
It's hard for me imagine how they will encounter each other. will they go to the place call "lonely hearts club"? i think it will be awkward for man going such place... but i leave it until the demos is out ^^
And thing that make me really-really looking forward this one is the art! Yeah they so cool! It's not just because their drawing like anime or manga the the coloring and proportion is so good that i don't have any complain. But Quinn eyes are yellow so i think she resemble a cat .-.

looking forward this project ^^
Thanks! :D Yes, thanks for mentioning about it being awkward for men going to such a place but my writer and I will make sure that it is as realistic as possible so it doesn't feel weird or disturb the story.
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Re: Lonely Hearts Club (Otome, Romance, Drama)

#15 Post by LadyOfGatsby »

Progress is running smoothly! The outline and Sprites are all finished. Currently, I am working with my writer on the script.
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