[Demo] la gata blanca [GxG][Mystery/Exploration][open end]

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unicodepepper
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[Demo] la gata blanca [GxG][Mystery/Exploration][open end]

#1 Post by unicodepepper » Tue Mar 07, 2017 2:58 am

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la gata blanca is a near-future story about a girl who wants to find a stable life in a quiet and scarcely populated island that faces an impending doom, unknown to its inhabitants; and a computer program that will do whatever it takes to preserve itself, with unforeseen consequences.

It is set up in an island that is mainly a scientific settlement for a radio-telescope, and as such, most electronic equipment is forbidden. It will explore themes such as the limits of human comprehension, the search for patterns on data full of noise, and the need for survival in a modern environment we aren't genetically prepared for.

The game will also feature a nonlinear, semi-open world style of gameplay: instead of being focused on a continuous narrative, it is focused on a discrete set of events set in individual locations, allowing the player to explore and complete sidequests and other secrets.

characters:
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Pio
The main character of this story. She has dreamed her whole life to visit the island for a couple of years to study astronomy with the scientific experts that work in the radio-telescope. She has, however, been chosen for something greater, against her will.

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Yae
A veteran astronomer. She has been working at the observatory for more than it could appear. With a friendly yet strong temperament, she is an excellent leader for the two pupils that are now under her watch, but she won't hesitate before attacking whenever she feels they are being threatened. Probably has a whole armory hidden in the basement.

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Mae
Yae's only pupil before Pio arrived. She was only supposed to work on the technical side of the observatory, making sure all the computer systems work properly and don't interfere with each other; but she has been learning a little about astronomy as well. She works really hard, because her main and only goal is to provide a nice and happy life to her blind younger sister. She's a soft bean with a hard luck.

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Rua
No one is quite sure what she's doing in the island. She has been there for a really long time, longer than even Yae. She runs a pizza shop that doesn't actually sell pizza, and she looks like she's ready to start a violent revolution and overthrow the government at any given moment. Probably has an even bigger armory hidden in her basement.

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ATM
An automated teller machine is an electronic telecommunications device that enables the customers of a financial institution to perform financial transactions, particularly cash withdrawal, without the need for a human cashier, clerk or bank teller. Why is this particular one in such an inconvenience place? More importantly, why is it speaking? The less you know, the better.

Download link
Just keep in mind - it's a demo, it's not a full game. You can download it from Google Drive by clicking here. I might upload it elsewhere, if it's more convenient for all of you, but since it's already on Drive, I guess it's okay to share it like this.

Please remember that this is a demo I made to test the aesthetic style as well as the location system (which was fairly tricky to implement in ren'py), and it contains around 5-10% of the text that the final version I plan to make; so don't get discouraged if you finish it too quickly! I promise I'll keep working on it. I think the hardest part of the coding is already done.

As an ending note, I'd like to say that this is the first project in ren'py I've made that I've also made available to the public, so I'm really really excited about it. I'd love any kind of feedback that you can give me, for real. Do the graphics suck? Are the buttons inconvenient? Is the help menu actually helpful? I want to know, so please let me know.

Also check out my development blog at mtpr-dev.tumblr.com for minor updates on this. I might post stuff on my personal twitter as well.

Thank you for reading, and have a great day!
Last edited by unicodepepper on Wed Mar 08, 2017 5:30 pm, edited 1 time in total.

ArmandoR
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Re: [Demo] la gata blanca [GxG][Mystery/Exploration][open en

#2 Post by ArmandoR » Tue Mar 07, 2017 11:36 am

I don't know if there's a problem with my route, or just that the game isn't finished, but after a while there's nothing else to do in the game. Going anywhere just triggers the same conversation again. However, there's potential to make an "open world" VN like this. There's a mystery, and there's expectation. The player can sense something weird happening here. However, the script needs some touching up.

Up next I'll post my opinions in every scene in the novel. There'll be spoilers (although this is a very short story).
First, I liked the prologue. The effect of the circles is creepy but the dialogue seems condescending, friendly, creating an interesting character there. However, you can see the name of the "god" even if the protagonist doesn't know it yet. This should be fixed (it separates what the protagonist knows and what the player knows).

Next thing is the colors of the background. To keep it short: wtf no

Next up is the conversation with Rua. It goes too fast taking into account they don't know each other, yet she manages to give 3 tasks to the poor little protagonist who can't say no. This is allright but it would be better if she gave you those tasks over time. It would make for more time to get to know the characters better, and also wouldn't load the player with many things to do at the same time.

I headed next to the observatory to ship the package (whatever it was?), and somehow I got money for free. Next night was close so I headed to the shop as I was told, and of course, who's going to agree to something when they tell you that you'd probably die? I didn't even know this girl. Maybe if I had passed more time with her? The war conspiracy just seems ridiculous anyway.

Slept there, then the next day went to the observatory to see if Yae had returned. She never returns, but here's when you hear one of the most intriguing lines on the novel: "You can keep the money. It isn't very useful in an island with literally 5 people in it."

What??? This rises some questions:
1- Did I always live in that island or did I just arrive? Seems like the later, as Rua told me I'm the new girl. However, the arrival of someone new on an island with 4 people would make for an important moment. Like, everyone should have been waiting for me to give to welcome me to the island. The fact that they don't know me is weird af.
2- Is a shop in an island with only 5 people even profitable?
3- There's also a school AND an observatory? This would mean many people lived there, but somehow they're gone now? What happened? HOW ARE THESE 4 PEOPLE SURVIVING ALONE?
4- Regarding ^, do each of them do their own laundry? Talk about wasteful.

Then there's the ATM. I gave him money, and he didn't tell me anything. I request a refund.

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