Just finished playing the demo. I would be interested in the Demo 1.0 cutting off at the same place; personally, I'm interested in going through it again with more polish and actual sprites.
There were definitely a fair number of typos, but it sounds like you're on that. ^_^
The textbox seemed a bit hard to read, at least with that font, that color, and that size. It's also a bit visually plain, especially compared to the backgrounds. I did really like that it was off to the side, though, and not covering the whole screen. The backgrounds were cool and appropriate.
I think there should be some vertical spaces between the menu choices, so I can tell at a glance which one is which and how many there are; I was relying on the mouse hover color to distinguish some of them.
The way the paragraphs appeared in the nvl window was fine with me, but I was thrown off when there was a background change. The transition causes the window to disappear for a second, so my expectation was that when the window reappeared, the text was all new. I caught on, of course, but it might be a good idea to nvl clear after those transitions. There was a bug in the path I chose where text overflowed. The line was "Midnight? You try to remember the time of the day [...]" with Lady Ileria; the script basically is missing a "nvl clear" around line 1030.
The stats made sense for the first couple choices, but it was a little confusing getting the big boost when deciding your background. It made logical sense -- your background would be significant, and it's cooler to choose it at the time you do than at the beginning. On the other hand, it felt weird for me because I couldn't really gauge what all the stats mean or how they will impact me as a player. It also makes the choices you make as a player seem less significant.
When you actually go to make a decision about the lands...
I chose "talking to people" before "analyze the situation," so when the "analyze the situation" choice said "go talk to people," it felt odd. I agree with having the choice to back out when you click "make a decision," so that you can go back and talk to people again if you want. I like the fact that after you talk to a person about one conversation topic, it goes back to the menu with their other conversation topics. I liked that there was an option to stop talking to them... the thing I didn't like, though, is that when you stopped talking to them, it would go allll the way back to the menu where you have to click, "talk to people," then "talk to elves," then "talk to X," as opposed to going back to the "talk to X" menu.
It did feel like there wasn't a lot of information to make a decision on. ...or, at least, why, as a disinterested party, choose NOT to try to divide the lands fairly? I mean... how does the decision actually influence ME? Also, I didn't understand the option that said that the lands are dangerous. I don't remember anyone saying anything about that, but I also didn't go back and talk to everyone a second time. Does the protagonist know something they don't?
Also, make sure to change "Talley" to "tally" (unless there is a person named Talley that I missed), and "moral" to "morale"
Although your background is revealed through the plot, the
reason why you were invited to court is not clear in the game. I'd recommend weaving that in.
As far as the Grand Elder and Ambassador, both seemed interesting. It's too early to say. I am glad the protagonist will get to "know" them better.
The stat system was making sense, but the huge boost I mentioned above made it feel harder (to me) to keep track of. And it wasn't clear exactly how the stats apply. For example, I wondered if high intelligence, cunning, and reputation (my highest stats) good enough for a speech, or if that was a charm, perception, and/or creativity based thing? My perception/charm/creativity were low relative to my higher stats (60/65/65 vs 80), but I had no sense of what is "high" and what is not when it comes to making decisions.
I tried making comments about other people's speeches, thinking this may be more suited to cunning, but it fell flat... I went back and did the speech, and the speech did wonderfully! From the text it seemed that reputation was the key.
I was also very surprised when a bath increased my cunning!
Regarding the stats:
Intelligence: makes sense -- I assume it's how smart/knowledgeable you are.
Charm: also make sense -- I assume it's how charismatic you seem to other people.
Cunning: There could be some overlap with intelligence, but I can understand how it's different (it is not knowledge based).
Willpower: makes sense -- I assume it's how determined you are in the face of adversity.
Perception: not sure -- Is it how people perceive you? (would overlap with charm) Is it how you perceive other people? (would overlap with intelligence/cunning, although less so... I would assume it's more of a social intelligence, which is different from both of those, but I am not sure that non-social intelligence would have much value in this game. When it comes to succeeding in decisions, I would expect cunning would take precedence.)
Creativity: Seems like this would overlap with cunning; it makes sense that it's different but I am not sure how that applies to the kind of choices in this game. In a way it could be considered a prerequisite to cunning.
Wealth: meaningless without a frame of reference.. if you don't actually buy stuff in the game, descriptive words (ie. "high," "average") would be better than a number (if you do... maybe descriptive words in addition to the number?)
Reputation: I understand what this means but not how it applies. (there is some overlap with charm -- I would assume reputation applies to people who don't know you, and charm applies to people you're interacting with in the present, although, in present interaction it seems reputation would
interfere with charm if one is high and one is low, and vice versa)
I think you're right in that a "law system" could get overly complicated... but it depends on how you do it. I think the important thing is to make choices meaningful both going into it and in the results.
Anyway, good luck! I will be awaiting the next demo. ^_^
EDIT:
Consider doing a "encyclopedia" type screen where you can see the things you've learned so far. I think that would be helpful!
