Cafe Memoria Demo v0.1[BxG][Comedy][Slice of Life][Waitress]

[thebackup]

After months of hard work, the Cafe Memoria demo is now playable! Thanks to those who helped me get to this point.

Demo version 0.1 contains:

• Just two routes: Anna and Mikaela
• No voice acting for now, but will be in future versions (still recording / post-processing!)

Learn more about the game here: http://lemmasoft.renai.us/forums/viewto ... 43&t=26282
Website now open!

Screenshots




Cafe Memoria 0.1 can be downloaded here:
Windows / Mac / Linux (72 MB)


Some tips on rating your waitress (and seeing all her possible reactions):

• Rate her bad: just press enter on the rating screen
• Rate her in-between: answer at least 4 out of the 6 questions, comments optional
• Rate her highly: answer all the questions, must comment

What I'm looking for:

• Constructive criticism
• Bugs, especially when you select drinks / food / waitress rating. Or if it works fine.
• If Mikaela's route unlocks correctly after playing Anna's route
• If it works fine on Mac and Linux machines (or if it just works ^^)
• Anything else

Thanks for your interest and enjoy, let me know what you think

[meiri]

Everything looks great, so far! Very, very well put together!
Errors/buggy things:
On the preferences screen, while in Windowed mode, the "Windowed" button is not check. In fullscreen, the fullscreen button is properly checked.
Also, when typing a comment on the review form, as you type to the end of the first line, it will jerk forward, then jerk backwards as it wraps to the second line. This doesn't happen when typing on the other lines.
There were also a few typos in Anna's route, but I wasn't sure if you needed to know about these.

Other than that, the whole thing is very polished and professional! I look forward to seeing the finished result.

[thebackup]

Everything looks great, so far! Very, very well put together!

Thanks!

On the preferences screen, while in Windowed mode, the "Windowed" button is not check. In fullscreen, the fullscreen button is properly checked.

Hm, it looks fine to me. Although I do notice nothing's checked if you drag the corners of the window.

Also, when typing a comment on the review form, as you type to the end of the first line, it will jerk forward, then jerk backwards as it wraps to the second line. This doesn't happen when typing on the other lines.

Yeah, I noticed that. Not really sure what's causing it, I'll investigate.

There were also a few typos in Anna's route, but I wasn't sure if you needed to know about these.

It would be nice to point out where the typos are.

Other than that, the whole thing is very polished and professional! I look forward to seeing the finished result.

Thanks again! Really appreciate your input.

[pocoscon]

This game was a fun thing to play . I really like the art, and the writing was pretty good, though I felt sometimes you were telling what he was doing rather then showing. As for which girl I liked the most I'd have to say Anna because I'm like her on the shy level, though not that much. She also made me feel guilty when i rated her low to see how she would react . Mikaela wasn't too bad, but I'm not really into those type of characters. I felt like she shouldn't have been cross to her friend like that. Just was a tad too much. Overall though, it was a fun little play. It's just really short, and I was wonder if those paths are that short

[meiri]

There were also a few typos in Anna's route, but I wasn't sure if you needed to know about these.

It would be nice to point out where the typos are.

1: "She cooks some of, if not the best ever." (Said when Ryne is speaking of how he thinks Julia works at Cafe Memoria)
2: (This is in Mikaela's route) "Yeah, Mikaela's has quite the foul mouth."

Not many, but they confused me, so I thought itd be best to let you know

[thebackup]

As for which girl I liked the most I'd have to say Anna because I'm like her on the shy level, though not that much. She also made me feel guilty when i rated her low to see how she would react .

Yeah, she's pretty sensitive to criticism ^^;

Mikaela wasn't too bad, but I'm not really into those type of characters. I felt like she shouldn't have been cross to her friend like that. Just was a tad too much.

At least you can rate her bad. She does have her reasons for dumping her frustration onto him, though. She was pretty fun to write, although it's pretty hard, say, not making her go over-the-top (I did try not to).

Overall though, it was a fun little play. It's just really short, and I was wonder if those paths are that short

Thanks! Yeah, they're mostly short, but that was my intention. Developing this VN feels pretty long despite its length! Julia's route in the full version might be a little longer than the rest.
Maybe I should add a bonus route or create an expansion pack...

1: "She cooks some of, if not the best ever." (Said when Ryne is speaking of how he thinks Julia works at Cafe Memoria)
2: (This is in Mikaela's route) "Yeah, Mikaela's has quite the foul mouth."

Not many, but they confused me, so I thought itd be best to let you know

Thanks!

[Glitter Rose Apple 3]

downloading this on a Mac now; will tell you if it works! It looks good

[thebackup]

downloading this on a Mac now; will tell you if it works! It looks good

Thanks, looking forward to what you have to say!

[Fenrir34]

Very short, but nice and refreshing all the same. Also, only add an expansion pack if you want. I think this game is nice and gives the player something fun to play even if it's a bit short. And though she was a bit too angry, I did like Mikaela a lot. She reminds me of a friend of my sister's XD

[thebackup]

Very short, but nice and refreshing all the same. Also, only add an expansion pack if you want. I think this game is nice and gives the player something fun to play even if it's a bit short. And though she was a bit too angry, I did like Mikaela a lot. She reminds me of a friend of my sister's XD

Thanks, I'm glad you like it! It was my intention to be short, I need more experience creating VNs. ^^ I kind of thought I made Mikaela a little too angry, but glad you like her!

[meiri]

Due to the nature of the comments so far, I must ask: Are the girls' routes longer than this in the full version?

[thebackup]

Due to the nature of the comments so far, I must ask: Are the girls' routes longer than this in the full version?

The routes are about the same length in the full version (with possible exception of Julia's, which might be a little longer).

[SinSisters]

I didn't have any bugs that weren't already mentioned (the food/drink choices, plus unlocked path all worked fine )
So I wrote things down that I noticed while playing.

• I really enjoyed the artwork! The character sprites are very nice
• The GUI is quite pleasing to look at
• Neat concept!
• Transitions are a little startling (the slide or wipe transition, I suppose it's called...), consider something more natural
• The format of ellipses is used rather inconsistently. Sometimes, you have a space after, and sometimes you don't (made up ex "You know...we really shouldn't do this." vs "You know... we really shouldn't do this.") Technically, ellipses in informal speech to create pauses don't really have a proper structure, but the standard and accepted way to write them is with a space proceeding the ellipses, unless quotations or question marks (maybe exclamation marks, should the occasion arise). Also, don't overuse ellipses... they... can get... tiresome...
• The little loading thing in the bottom right corner irritates me, to be honest, as it reminds me of typical loading screens... which we all hate XD Just a personal opinion, but it might be better without anything there.
• When Anna is stuttering, try repeating words, not just single letters. Spice it up! (You—you really th-think so? vs Y-you really t-think so?)
• On that note, it seems odd when Mikaela stutters. She's so outspoken, and considering that most people don't stutter than much in real life (though we do stammer occasionally), you might want to change that.
• Also whatever font is being used means that I can't give Anna the cute little <3 heart like I wanted *sigh* Not really a problem, just noticed it and thought it was weird. Is that a UK keyboard thing?
• It seems unnatural for when I gave Anna a cute little comment and the highest possible rating that she says "Oh, so I did an okay job?" and he says "To be honest it wasn't the best" dude I gave her the highest possible, why you no praise?! I understand that you have to write a decent length comment, but if I were a waitress and I got all 10s and best recommendation, I wouldn't really care that much what the comment says.
• Okay, this part was really weird "I watch as Mikaela gets my drink. Unlike Anna, she gets it with little difficulty. However, as she gets it, she just stands there and thinks:" I have a few problems with it—firstly, "gets" is repeated three times in the same sentence, consider changing... Secondly, it's really, really weird to be in 1st person POV and then suddenly we know what Mikaela is thinking. O.o Consider just observing Mikaela standing with the drink, then going into the "waitress POV" mode.
• You should have an option to 'wipe' the screen, we can see the background! I know that we can press 1st and 2nd mouse button at the same time, but it's easier if we can just press a button so we don't mess up (heheh, talking from experience)
• "Wow, just wow." is a pretty lame reaction from Ryne when talking about a burger. Consider changing.
• When Mikaela checks up on Ryne, she says "How's the burger and fries", but it should be "How're the burger and fries"
• Uh, Mikaela says "Aaaaand what about the onion blossom?" to which Ryne says "Pretty good as well, Mikaela." Then she says, "Aaaand how good was the onion blossom?" That's kinda redundant, considering Ryne just told her that it was pretty good... I realize that it's because Mikaela wants a bigger reaction from him, but if she just says, "Aaaand?" even if it's twice in a row, it sounds more natural.

Hopefully you find this feedback helpful! It's a very cute game

-Nat

[sasquatchii]

Wow, fantastic job with this game!! I am really looking forward to playing it once it's complete!

Here's just my two cents:

1. The transitions between scenes are pretty jarring, I'm not really a fan of how they just sort of slide across the screen- it's kind of weird? I also didn't really like the side character portraits sliding in the way they do.
2. The character sprites and backgrounds are great! I really loved them, everything's so cute & there's lots of detail.
3. In the drinks menu, you can order "orange" "apple" or "grapefruit". I thought this was a little weird, wouldn't it be orange juice, apple juice, or grapefruit juice?
4. One thing that bothered me- if you order the sausage, egg, and waffles, Ryne goes on to say "Lots of protein in this meal, although I don't think one should eat this often if you have heart disease." Protein isn't bad for the heart, protein is actually very good for you & necessary in order to survive. So sausage and eggs are actually pretty healthy! The only unhealthy item would be the waffles, as they are high in carbs + sugar.
5. When I went to go type in a comment on the feedback form, the form actually moved all the way too the right and then off the screen after I typed too many characters. Then I'd type some more and it'd snap back in place. I thought it was a little weird, so I've attached a screenshot to show what I mean.



6. I found Mikaela absolutely frustrating, and it takes a lot for me to feel frustrated with characters in a VN xD Although my boyfriend is a waiter so I understand her pain. Working in the food industry can be a hard & thankless job.
7. I did think it was weird, that even though I gave Mikala the worst possible ratings, she called me up and acted nice and perfectly normal, odd as she was seriously such a jerk earlier! Will giving girls bad ratings affect your relationships with them in the full game?

[thebackup]

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@SinSisters
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I really enjoyed the artwork! The character sprites are very nice
The GUI is quite pleasing to look at
Neat concept!

Thanks!

Transitions are a little startling (the slide or wipe transition, I suppose it's called...), consider something more natural

I thought the slide transitions would make things a little more interesting, to give the feeling of "walking / running", but if they're too distracting then I'll change them.

Also whatever font is being used means that I can't give Anna the cute little <3 heart like I wanted *sigh* Not really a problem, just noticed it and thought it was weird. Is that a UK keyboard thing?

Nah, it's the font. I never thought the '<' and '>' characters would be something else. Will change!

It seems unnatural for when I gave Anna a cute little comment and the highest possible rating that she says "Oh, so I did an okay job?" and he says "To be honest it wasn't the best" dude I gave her the highest possible, why you no praise?! I understand that you have to write a decent length comment, but if I were a waitress and I got all 10s and best recommendation, I wouldn't really care that much what the comment says.

Looks like I have to change how the game calculates the comments! Sounds like you've should've gotten the best reaction, as opposed to the middle reaction.
Comments don't have to be long, it could be just one word, like "cute", "charming", or whatever.

You should have an option to 'wipe' the screen, we can see the background! I know that we can press 1st and 2nd mouse button at the same time, but it's easier if we can just press a button so we don't mess up (heheh, talking from experience)

Not sure what you mean, you mean removing the text box so you can see the sprite and BG? Or removing the sprite and text box so you can just see the BG?

Hopefully you find this feedback helpful! It's a very cute game

Thanks! Will consider your suggestions.

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@sasquatchii
==============

Wow, fantastic job with this game!! I am really looking forward to playing it once it's complete!
...
2. The character sprites and backgrounds are great! I really loved them, everything's so cute & there's lots of detail.

Thanks!

1. The transitions between scenes are pretty jarring, I'm not really a fan of how they just sort of slide across the screen- it's kind of weird? I also didn't really like the side character portraits sliding in the way they do.

See second quote from SinSisters.

3. In the drinks menu, you can order "orange" "apple" or "grapefruit". I thought this was a little weird, wouldn't it be orange juice, apple juice, or grapefruit juice?

Yeah, but I thought it would be implied they're juices, considering they're juxtaposed with images. I guess I should be more clear.

4. One thing that bothered me- if you order the sausage, egg, and waffles, Ryne goes on to say "Lots of protein in this meal, although I don't think one should eat this often if you have heart disease." Protein isn't bad for the heart, protein is actually very good for you & necessary in order to survive. So sausage and eggs are actually pretty healthy! The only unhealthy item would be the waffles, as they are high in carbs + sugar.

I should rewrite that then! I was thinking about the cholesterol content in the eggs and sausages.

5. When I went to go type in a comment on the feedback form, the form actually moved all the way too the right and then off the screen after I typed too many characters. Then I'd type some more and it'd snap back in place. I thought it was a little weird, so I've attached a screenshot to show what I mean.

Yeah, I'm aware of it. Not really sure what's causing it, will investigate.

6. I found Mikaela absolutely frustrating, and it takes a lot for me to feel frustrated with characters in a VN xD Although my boyfriend is a waiter so I understand her pain. Working in the food industry can be a hard & thankless job.

Yeah, Mikaela can be pretty frustrating. ^^
I've worked in the food industry a long while back and yeah, it can be hard and thankless.

7. I did think it was weird, that even though I gave Mikala the worst possible ratings, she called me up and acted nice and perfectly normal, odd as she was seriously such a jerk earlier! Will giving girls bad ratings affect your relationships with them in the full game?

I was considering this, but decided not to, to keep things somewhat short. Maybe in a future version, should I decide to expand on this project!