Lemma Soft Forums

Its my first actual attempt at a visual novel so if all goes well i shall make more
Promo wallpaper

Set a few years from now, Earth's population contains what have been recently discovered to be Espers, individuals whom have outstanding physical features and abilities outside the possibilities of humans. For awhile they were disregarded and treated mostly fairly until a tragic incident occurred, causing over 250,000 deaths. this story takes place a few years after that.

This demo does leave out some details i still need to work out but do let me know how it is as it stands; this demo is also only 15 percent of the full story.
in-game shot



http://www.mediafire.com/download/jl6z8 ... .0-win.zip

I have to log in or sign up to Mediafire to download the game. It's pretty inconvenient to me.

sorry about that; i changed the url so you should be abe to download it. you also made me realize i puT the wrong url TO BEGIN WITH xD

The story itself is interesting and the characters feel like they are real people/non-people. There appears to be no bigger story yet other than the lives of these two living under Adeline's house, but it does feel like there's going to be a bigger picture.

The art is mediocre but well made. The characters blend in naturally with the background, but I expect better art after the whole game is finished. So I'm merely commenting on the initial art. The facial expressions feel significant and real.

The UI is needlessly large. The default size of the text area is sufficient IMO. Also, if you're using a bright colored text area, you should use dark colored text. It was a little hard to read, and a little bit of an eyesore.

I notice there are some glitches with Hisao on the fight scene. You are attempting to change his facial expression using a transition but he ends up disappearing and turning into something else. Are you using the 'with dissolve' transition?

The fight scene needs sound effects. It felt very anti-climactic for a fight scene. I would also say that a little bit more movement would be nice for the first two goons at least.

I feel like there are unnecessary stops in the music. Maybe that's just me. But I feel as if there's no need to stop the music where you stopped them, or just find music more suited to the background. Speaking of the music, I like your choices.

Also, Hisao kinda sorta reminded me of someone... an esper... with white hair... wearing line pattern clothing...
hahaha. but don't worry about it.

The game shows a lot of promise, but from what I'm seeing, 11% doesn't describe it. The game and story has potential to be quite lengthy and elaborate.

I'll be looking forward to future game updates.

Yeah, the accelerator similarities dawned on me after I'd drawn and started the story xD
But I appreciate the feedback; if I may ask, what in the artwrork seemed mediocre?

what in the artwrork seemed mediocre?

first of all, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. So you are free to disagree with me for having my own eye for this

Well, first off, the art does seem more elaborate than simple. There's definitely details that I can't match with my own, those are all good things.

It's mediocre in a sense that, I know it can look better, I know it has the potential to look a whole lot better, but it looks like a quick sketch. There's a level of elaborate work put into it, but the output all-in-all feels incomplete.

I'm no expert in anatomy, but i'm pretty sure the nose should be placed a little bit more in the center. Even if their noses was intentionally long, imo, it should be placed a bit more in the center. Adeline's arms are a bit too thin even though her shoulders are wide.

The backgrounds have a hint of realism in it. Which is a good thing. But the output looks like clip-art.

Well, that all sounds like mumbo jumbo, but I can't think of a way to word it better.

Everyone has their own style, and there's different strokes for different folks. So to me, personally, and it might just be me, the art feels mediocre. It could be better. That's my conclusion to the question.

No Mac version?

philip

No Mac version atm sadly.

ZennyPai wrote:

what in the artwrork seemed mediocre?

first of all, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. So you are free to disagree with me for having my own eye for this

Well, first off, the art does seem more elaborate than simple. There's definitely details that I can't match with my own, those are all good things.

It's mediocre in a sense that, I know it can look better, I know it has the potential to look a whole lot better, but it looks like a quick sketch. There's a level of elaborate work put into it, but the output all-in-all feels incomplete.

I'm no expert in anatomy, but i'm pretty sure the nose should be placed a little bit more in the center. Even if their noses was intentionally long, imo, it should be placed a bit more in the center. Adeline's arms are a bit too thin even though her shoulders are wide.

The backgrounds have a hint of realism in it. Which is a good thing. But the output looks like clip-art.

Well, that all sounds like mumbo jumbo, but I can't think of a way to word it better.

Everyone has their own style, and there's different strokes for different folks. So to me, personally, and it might just be me, the art feels mediocre. It could be better. That's my conclusion to the question.

I'll have to keep the clip art comment in the forefront of my though process lol haven't heard that before. I'll be sure to keep those things in mind ^^

A little something like this.

http://silicon-valley-report.com/wp-con ... ip-art.gif

Obviously, your art has more details and everything. It's just my opinion on how it looked to me.