Would anybody be willing to read my Death Note VN?

[NikiFig]

I have hardly had anyone read my script - I'm only asking for someone to read my code and story and offer some constructive feedback.

Please, tell me if you are interested and I will be more than happy to share my work with you. This is such a crucial step!

[Taleweaver]

Um, well, if you describe the VN in a little more detail, this may attract possible readers. Also, it would allow me to move this thread to our Recruitment forums, where you have a better chance of finding people.

[Taranee]

Which characters did you write about? Are there shippings? Pro or anti-Kira?

[NikiFig]

MeroNia (Mello x Near).

Canon divergent AU in which Near gets a temporary lease on a home, Mello is homeless (and survives), comes to visit, is invited to stay, you have to get jobs and shit ensues.

[Imperf3kt]

Why does this sound like Hataraku Maou-sama, but with DeathNote charachers xD
Do the jobs consist of working at McRonalds?

[NikiFig]

McRonalds? Haha, no. xD That would be funny, though.

Honestly there was a point in which I was so frustrated with it, I was just gonna make an ending in which Mello gets beaten with a bat to death by Sangwoo and Near goes off to try his clumsy little ass at figure skating.