Feedback for writing (Already implemented in game but no art)

Questions, skill improvement, and respectful critique involving game writing.
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Posts: 1
Joined: Thu Jul 25, 2019 4:33 am
itch: kiriponan

Feedback for writing (Already implemented in game but no art)

#1 Post by Kiriponan » Wed Aug 28, 2019 10:34 am

Hello! This is my very first post here.

I'm currently working on a linear slice of life game about a country bumpkin who moves into a bigger town with a curious lodger who doesn't seem to go outside at all. I'm more of an artist but I've been trying to improve my writing. This is my first visual novel project for school.

I've recently just finished writing chapter one of the story (out of three) and I wanted to see what people thought! I've already implemented it in the game with some sounds and music since I wanted to create some sort of immersion even without the artwork. I would love to hear your thoughts and feedback in regards to how interesting/boring you found it! I want to create a heartfelt experience with characters you grow to love.

Links to the game:
Mac: ... sp=sharing

Windows: ... sp=sharing

Some additional questions I would like answered (if you would care to!):
What stood out most to you?
Were the sounds distracting?
Did the music fit the tone of the game?
Which character was your favourite?

It should take around half an hour to finish the play through. Thank you so much for your time! I hope for my next post to be a more polished and improved version of this with more content and with art work.

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