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Leap – a story about friendship and courage that's... 100% likely to end bloodily (but there are good endings!)

Apathetic about life, Rabbit has never bothered to venture far outside of his/her favourite clearing. Rabbit's self-imposed loneliness ends abruptly when a vicious fight takes Fox and Dog tumbling through the tastiest grass in the entire forest. As the fight between the two predators takes an unexpected turn, Rabbit has to choose who to help.

Characters:



Rabbit's just your regular grass-muncher, though maybe a bit on the plump side. He/she is perfectly happy with his/her lot in life, and would really rather no crazy individuals invaded his/her sanctuary.




Fox is charming and polite, but probably shouldn't be trusted. His tail is his pride and joy, and he claims he has never met a fox with a fluffier one.




Dog makes the impression of being gruff and stand-offish. Deep inside, he's exactly the humourless jerk he appears to be. Bears a deep grudge against Fox.

(Dog may very well be the first tsundere-like character I've ever written. I'm actually a little bit uncomfortable about this.)

My first attempt at a VN and therefore not very complicated - I want to finish it for the experience. The story is really short and has four possible endings. I'm trying to focus on the quality of my writing and art this time. Also, English is not my native language, so feel welcome to point out any mistakes.

My most pressing question is: what do you think about the art style? Would sprites drawn in this way look okay?

Progress:
--Script: 1st draft completed
--Sprites: 17/24?
--CG's: -/19?
--Backgrounds: --
--GUI: --
--Coding: --
--Music: --

Draw the sprites how you like--but I just want to say I love the style!
I can't wait for more progress because this looks so fun and interesting~

Sprites like these would be cute, Fox's pose and coloring especially.

9-of-Hearts wrote:Draw the sprites how you like--but I just want to say I love the style!
I can't wait for more progress because this looks so fun and interesting~

I'm really glad you like it And thank you so much for the encouragement!

Thyroid wrote:Sprites like these would be cute, Fox's pose and coloring especially.

Thank you! That's actually one of the things I'm unsure about. How much pose variation should there be? As much as possible? Or is it better to remain more or less consistent? Some variation is unavoidable if I want to convey emotion without facial expressions, but is there a line I shouldn't cross?

teamaker wrote: Thank you! That's actually one of the things I'm unsure about. How much pose variation should there be? As much as possible? Or is it better to remain more or less consistent? Some variation is unavoidable if I want to convey emotion without facial expressions, but is there a line I shouldn't cross?

You're welcome. Not using facial expressions is a neat idea, animal body language sounds fun to work with. I think the line would be very different poses that made it look like the character was frantically jumping around when they weren't meant to be. Which even then maybe could be avoided by changing poses carefully and matching the tone of the scene. Are you going to use CGs? Lots of major pose variations could be kept oriented in the same basic direction for consistency. You have some leeway on that with a small cast and a loose expressive style, I think. So the amount and kind of variation should depend on the emotions that need to be conveyed and whether they're conveyed in a big abrupt way or a smaller contained way.

This project is very much an experiment and yes, it's been fun so far. Rabbit is the most challenging character, because his face is particularly inexpressive, but it gives me so much freedom in how I choose to represent emotion. Of course, there's the danger that I won't be able to make it clear enough.

The “frantic jumping around” is exactly what I'm worried about, although if I do it right, I think I might be able to emphasize on, say, Fox's 'twisty' sort of personality through movement. Or would that sort of thing be distracting?

I'm definitely going to use CGs for major events, but in most cases the focus will be action, not emotion.

Thank you for the thoughtful response. I'm definitely going to keep it in mind.

I adore this concept! I love animal protagonists, and your character designs are just too cute. I think the painterly art style fits this kind of story really well, to be honest. As long as your backgrounds and GUI are consistent with the sprite style, I don't think there should be any problems.

If you're not using facial expressions at all, I actually think pose variation, or alternatively lots of CGs, would be more important than ever. I'm certainly not opposed to more movement, especially if it fits the character's personality. Would using slower dissolve transitions between sprite variations help if you're worried about "jumping around"?

Thank you! I was kind of scared I'd be the only one all excited about fluffy rabbits having adventures. In all honesty, this concept was supposed to keep me from stretching the story too much, and from making it too serious. Also I've never really drawn animals before, so I wanted to practice.

Arowana wrote:Would using slower dissolve transitions between sprite variations help if you're worried about "jumping around"?

This is a useful suggestion. I'll have to look it up once I get around to actually coding this thing. And the amount of CGs that the story really won't work without is turning out to be pretty intimidating. The one good thing about it, I think, is that I won't have to worry about backgrounds all that much.

Oh my goshhh!
All these sprites are cute <3<3
I really love your idea on this ~
Who can resist cute animals? Hopefully the endings wont be too bloody... lol

I had a peek over at your gamethread after reading your other post and wow. I absolutely adore that art. It's so utterly adorable.

Your picture of dog doesn't make him seem to be a humourless jerk though. His tongue's out, his tail's lifted, he looks like a happy dog there, not stand-offish. Fox looks lovely.

I love rabbit. Rabbit does look a bit grumpy there, a bit wise. They look pleased with their lot in life, all fat and cuddly with droopy ears and really up for no nonsense. the description of Rabbit as just a regular grass-muncher, the phrase makes me smile. (Oops, maybe I do prefer plural pronouns to it after all.)

I went through a phase in my childhood where I read every single animal story I could get my hands on. I loved Watership Down, especially the rabbit fables, and Br'er Rabbit, and Coyote Tales, and Aesop's Fables.

Now, I don't generally play visual novels, so to me the lack of any sort of expressions wouldn't bother me at all. I'd be more than happy with just the pictures you've drawn above (with the above mentioned comment about dog looking happy taken into consideration).

Animals express their emotions through body language, but I don't think you really need to do even that. You're telling a fable, you're using animal archetypes, no reason they can't just be as they are, I think.

ixWishing wrote:Who can resist cute animals? Hopefully the endings wont be too bloody... lol

The level of bloodiness varies. I don't think it's too bad. And thank you! I'm glad you like the sprites.

Fairy Godfeather wrote:Your picture of dog doesn't make him seem to be a humourless jerk though. His tongue's out, his tail's lifted, he looks like a happy dog there, not stand-offish. Fox looks lovely.

Ahh, I know. This is his excited look, and it's here because I had nothing better to post. I'll change it right away.

Oh, Watership Down! I need to finish reading that book, it's so brilliant. It's been a while, but I remember needing to put it down because I couldn't deal with the tension, haha. (I must have been almost eighteen at the time. It's ridiculous.)

Sprites are the most fun (and the easiest) to draw, so I'll probably end up making quite a few. Besides, if I'm treating this project as an exercise in making VNs, I probably shouldn't skip any of the steps. Thanks for the reassuring comment, though! It's the most amazing feeling when someone tells you they like your character.

teamaker wrote:

ixWishing wrote:Who can resist cute animals? Hopefully the endings wont be too bloody... lol

The level of bloodiness varies. I don't think it's too bad. And thank you! I'm glad you like the sprites.

Fairy Godfeather wrote:Your picture of dog doesn't make him seem to be a humourless jerk though. His tongue's out, his tail's lifted, he looks like a happy dog there, not stand-offish. Fox looks lovely.

Ahh, I know. This is his excited look, and it's here because I had nothing better to post. I'll change it right away.

Oh, Watership Down! I need to finish reading that book, it's so brilliant. It's been a while, but I remember needing to put it down because I couldn't deal with the tension, haha. (I must have been almost eighteen at the time. It's ridiculous.)

Sprites are the most fun (and the easiest) to draw, so I'll probably end up making quite a few. Besides, if I'm treating this project as an exercise in making VNs, I probably shouldn't skip any of the steps. Thanks for the reassuring comment, though! It's the most amazing feeling when someone tells you they like your character.

Oh I'm glad you know. That picture you've replaced it with is so much better. I love that you have those different expressions for the animals. I really like the artwork.

Watership Down is a classic. Have you seen the movie? When you said hopefully not too bloody it made me think of the Watership Down cartoon which traumatised many a child.

Thank you so much! Let's hope the rest (i.e. backgrounds and CGs) won't be too disappointing in comparison.

I've never seen the film, except for some fragments in a youtube video which, yes, was traumatising. I'm one of those people who always have to read the book first.