I Need Your Critiques (Update: I'm Using Your Critiques)

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Obscura
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Re: I Need Your Critiques (Update: I'm Using Your Critiques)

#106 Post by Obscura » Thu Sep 20, 2012 1:40 am

@Crystal
That's hilarious. I think Graham is pretty hot myself.

@Auro
OMG, no wonder that looks so damn weird on my drawing. I rarely carry a purse, and it shows! >.< Thanks for the correction, that looks so much more natural.

@LWR
I feel like you never let me get away with anything. :roll:
But that's a great illustration, thanks

I drew her body underneath like you guys suggested.

LOL ain't gonna be the slammin' girls that draws anybody to this game...
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Re: I Need Your Critiques (Update: I'm Using Your Critiques)

#107 Post by Auro-Cyanide » Thu Sep 20, 2012 1:42 am

That looks much better :) Good job.
Last edited by Auro-Cyanide on Thu Sep 20, 2012 7:00 am, edited 1 time in total.

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Re: I Need Your Critiques (Update: I'm Using Your Critiques)

#108 Post by Obscura » Thu Sep 20, 2012 6:52 am

Auro-Cyanide wrote:That look much better :) Good job.
Thanks doll!

Here is Edwina colored...I think I need to stretch out her arm some more so it doesn't look so tiny...

Auro's presence in this thread just reminded me...I forgot my #*$&#$* eyelids again.

WOW I'm beat going to bed.
edwina8-gradient.png
PS I want to sob because my friend played my game and she said... "um....is there anyway you could animate your characters?

HAHAHAHAHA
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Re: I Need Your Critiques (Update: I'm Using Your Critiques)

#109 Post by Obscura » Thu Sep 20, 2012 5:31 pm

I guess I'll be returning to Edwina once I knock out a couple of more sprite (still trying to get my linework down...using the tutorial LWR posted as well as some others.)

Here's Graham...I need to go back and make him look like more of an a-hole.
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Re: I Need Your Critiques (Update: I'm Using Your Critiques)

#110 Post by Obscura » Thu Sep 20, 2012 10:00 pm

I don't know if it's the coloring that's making me sleepy or the vodka. :roll:

Anyways, I think my lines are still too thin and also too light...especially around the eyes for some reason.

Any critiques welcome. I'm basically banging out the basic sprites one by one and then I'll go back and fix them with your suggestions, so the style may be changing as I go along.
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Re: I Need Your Critiques (Update: I'm Using Your Critiques)

#111 Post by LateWhiteRabbit » Thu Sep 20, 2012 10:14 pm

Just a quick suggestion, but that line of highlights around the edge of the figure (the rim light) would probably work better in a different color - either a hotter version of your normal highlight color, or a complimentary color that reflects the environment.

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Re: I Need Your Critiques (Update: I'm Using Your Critiques)

#112 Post by CheeryMoya » Thu Sep 20, 2012 10:20 pm

Obscura wrote:I don't know if it's the coloring that's making me sleepy or the vodka. :roll:
You gotta stop doing this to yourself stop getting drunk.

Yo, is your monitor showing colors right? That or you decided to have a field day with orange. Edwina and Graham look way too tan for their own good, considering that they spend a lot of time in a lab. Here's a chart of human skintones and natural hair colors for reference. Also remember to keep the lightsource constant for all your sprite or they'll look strange.

Edit: Found the source, post updated in case anyone is reading through this thread again.
Last edited by CheeryMoya on Tue Jan 01, 2013 11:52 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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Re: I Need Your Critiques (Update: I'm Using Your Critiques)

#113 Post by FatUnicornGames » Thu Sep 20, 2012 10:34 pm

Obscura wrote:
graham_color4_display_small.png
Secret. Love. Interest.

So sordid and scandalous!
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Re: I Need Your Critiques (Update: I'm Using Your Critiques)

#114 Post by Obscura » Fri Sep 21, 2012 6:26 am

FatUnicornGames wrote:
Secret. Love. Interest.

So sordid and scandalous!
STOP THAT! You're actually making me start to consider the idea seriously.
CheeryMoya wrote:
Obscura wrote:I don't know if it's the coloring that's making me sleepy or the vodka. :roll:
You gotta stop doing this to yourself stop getting drunk.

Yo, is your monitor showing colors right? That or you decided to have a field day with orange. Edwina and Graham look way too tan for their own good, considering that they spend a lot of time in a lab. Here's a chart of human skintones (and let's toss in natural hair colors too while we're at it) for reference, I forgot the source >_> Also remember to keep the lightsource constant for all your sprite or they'll look strange.
Thanks for that...I have two monitors and they look completely different from one another. I should probably stick with that chart of skin tones to be safe.

LateWhiteRabbit wrote:Just a quick suggestion, but that line of highlights around the edge of the figure (the rim light) would probably work better in a different color - either a hotter version of your normal highlight color, or a complimentary color that reflects the environment.
This was suggested to me by the most awesome Tetiel earlier (who actually pointed out how to backlight) but they said for my simple art style it was probably gonna be unnecessary. DON'T YOU AGREE?!?!

Anyways, I was unhappy with Penny's earlier incarnation, so I redid her line art in Sai. I don't know if you guys have this problem, but I can spend several HOURS fiddling around with a face of a main character. I have to it look attractive to me in the right way or I can't stop thinking about it and I go bonkers. This is probably one of the reasons I will never make it as a commercial developer--I'm too damn inefficient at everything. Even my wonky old sprites...I spent probably the majority of the time 1) writing and 2) nudging single pixels of their facial features right and left until they looked attractive to me. Haha, not that that helped much...
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Re: I Need Your Critiques (Update: I'm Using Your Critiques)

#115 Post by Obscura » Sun Sep 23, 2012 12:22 am

OMG this took me forever and I'm still not happy with it. Her big pumpkin face is killing me but I don't want her to have a thinner face...I can't explain why.
penny new line art 13 color fill - layered 2.png
LWR I tried the hotter back light but it looked really weird...by hotter did you mean pink? Orange? Pink/oranger for each article, right? Not just one shade of pink/orange?

Anyways, I don't know what's going on with my monitors...she looks fine on my PC but now looks incredibly washed out on my Mac. (Usually it's the reverse.)

Any criticisms welcome.

* - oh, I should add maybe the reason for the color problem is that this is the first time I tried to do everything in Sai.
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Re: I Need Your Critiques (Update: I'm Using Your Critiques)

#116 Post by emit » Sun Sep 23, 2012 1:15 am

Aww I think her face looks really cute!

Your sprites are looking really good so far!

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Re: I Need Your Critiques (Update: I'm Using Your Critiques)

#117 Post by LateWhiteRabbit » Sun Sep 23, 2012 1:32 am

Obscura wrote:OMG this took me forever and I'm still not happy with it. Her big pumpkin face is killing me but I don't want her to have a thinner face...I can't explain why.
I like her big pumpkin face. Honestly, as I guy, the super models with the super sharp cheekbones and really defined bone structure in their face freak me out a little bit. I like a girl with squeezable cheeks.
Obscura wrote:
LWR I tried the hotter back light but it looked really weird...by hotter did you mean pink? Orange? Pink/oranger for each article, right? Not just one shade of pink/orange?
"Hotter" was probably poor word choice on my part. I really meant a brighter value (higher brightness) of whatever your normal light source color is for each sprite. I honestly don't know why i said "hotter". I blame lack of sleep.

As it stands, you aren't applying rim light consistently. For instance, why would the bottom of her fingers have rim light in that pose if the rim light is coming from behind? In the case of her pinky fingers, you have literally put a bright light edge in a shadow pool - if her shirt would have shadows where they are, the rim light on the fingers is impossible. Remember, rim light has its own light source, just like your main (key) light. Rim light is usually coming from behind, either tilted slightly down or slightly up on the subject.

Image

I'd investigate 3 point lighting if you want to continue to do rim lighting.
Image

But honestly, if you are going to stay with so simple a shading style, a rim light may not be a good fit anyway.
Obscura wrote:
Anyways, I don't know what's going on with my monitors...she looks fine on my PC but now looks incredibly washed out on my Mac. (Usually it's the reverse.)

Any criticisms welcome.

* - oh, I should add maybe the reason for the color problem is that this is the first time I tried to do everything in Sai.
It's my understanding that SAI doesn't do any color profiles beyond RGB. Working with a CMYK palette will give much more consistent results, and prints of your work will be the correct color. You also need to make sure that both or your monitors - the one on your PC and the one on your Mac - are properly calibrated. Unfortunately you'll never 100% solve the problem. Each monitor is going to be every so slightly different.

However, the effect can be mitigated by working with a palette and working with a known color profile. For a mini master class in color, Purplekecleon on Deviantart gives a ridiculous good Cliff Notes version of all the basics and pitfalls to watch out for. I'd recommend checking it out.

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Re: I Need Your Critiques (Update: I'm Using Your Critiques)

#118 Post by Obscura » Sun Sep 23, 2012 3:04 am

Thanks as always LWR for your excellent examples. I'm going through the color tutorial right now--the examples of ugly color combos are pretty much the ones I always pick. :roll:

Incidentally...I was curious as to what you do here aside from assist struggling artists. Is there a game you've worked on where we can see all this stellar art knowledge manifested?
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Re: I Need Your Critiques (Update: I'm Using Your Critiques)

#119 Post by fioricca » Sun Sep 23, 2012 3:28 am

Obscura wrote:OMG this took me forever and I'm still not happy with it. Her big pumpkin face is killing me but I don't want her to have a thinner face...I can't explain why.
penny new line art 13 color fill - layered 2.png
LWR I tried the hotter back light but it looked really weird...by hotter did you mean pink? Orange? Pink/oranger for each article, right? Not just one shade of pink/orange?

Anyways, I don't know what's going on with my monitors...she looks fine on my PC but now looks incredibly washed out on my Mac. (Usually it's the reverse.)

Any criticisms welcome.

* - oh, I should add maybe the reason for the color problem is that this is the first time I tried to do everything in Sai.
:DDDD

I am seriously amazed at how this is turning out! Her cloth folds are looking a lot more natural, there's a good sense of weight in the pose and she does look pretty cute. Your ability to implement advice and crit is amazing! I could read a thousand tutorials and have someone explain something to me numerous times but STILL get it all wrong (sob), so your progress is super cool to see. Great job!

Yeah I'm still stalking the resources and help that gets thrown into this post /o\

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Re: I Need Your Critiques (Update: I'm Using Your Critiques)

#120 Post by LateWhiteRabbit » Sun Sep 23, 2012 4:15 am

Obscura wrote:Thanks as always LWR for your excellent examples. I'm going through the color tutorial right now--the examples of ugly color combos are pretty much the ones I always pick. :roll:

Incidentally...I was curious as to what you do here aside from assist struggling artists. Is there a game you've worked on where we can see all this stellar art knowledge manifested?
Haha. No. I'm something of a hypocrite at this point. As I explained in another thread somewhere on the board here, I have worked on some indie game projects, made assets for one professional game, and worked in film doing special effects and 3D conversion. The situation I find myself in is my studio work is still under NDA, (and really wouldn't be interesting to the VN community I don't think - being film related and not terribly impressive by themselves) and I spend all my time working on my game projects for which I am far too much a perfectionist, and don't believe in showing any assets until a project is AT LEAST within six months of release. I stop far too many personal projects somewhere in the middle (always to pick them up again, but usually sometime down the road and combined with another project), and only a select few are completed, so I would hate to get a reputation as someone that continually promises vaporware. Honestly, I'm too hung up on professional project scope and size like I'm used to in TEAMS and since I'm a one man operation, that poses...logistical problems.

Anyway, my college artwork (now several years old) know embarrasses me (all artists are embarrassed by out of date work I believe), so I don't show it either. I am really trying to get a small project out the door (of the VN type) to show my stuff, and I am thinking of trying to do artwork for prints instead of spending my time doing all freelance work (which is mainly boring graphic design, and not cool illustration design), so hopefully I'll have some of them up to show in the coming months.

In the meantime, I repeat the lessons I've either learned myself, or had the privilege of receiving from better artists than I who I was fortunate enough to study under.

I'd show quick sketches, but I really do have an awful perfection complex I need to kick. It probably (likely) impedes me improving at the rate you are. So I rate myself a professional. but I'm not on a "master" level as an artist. I still scour tutorials and practice like you do.

EDIT: Eh. Here's a picture of a sculpt I did in college of Marv from Sin City. I see numerous problems with it now, but let the healing commence. :roll:
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