Lux-Nero requests improvement

[Lux Nero]

Hello everyone!

Lux-Nero here, and while I like to think I'm a good artist, I know I've got a lot to learn and I'm willing to improve myself. Thing is, I've got to a number of sites to look for helpful critiques, but every time, I usually get the same remarks that have been copied and pasted, peppered with insults that say that I suck and that I shouldn't bother to be an artist.

Therefore, I'm a little sensitive and defensive when it comes to this stuff, but, I give my word that I'll show respect to anyone who shows me respectful comments and critiques. I really do wanna improve, but if someone yells at you for making a mistake, you don't really learn - That's my opinion.

In any case, here's one of my latest works, and I'd like to get some critiques onto how I can improve myself.



Please be gentle.

[MaiMai]

Is it a complete piece or would you say it's still a work in progress or a work that's complete, but could use improvements? My general impression from this image is that there is no shading and that coloring for the building is rushed and messy seeing as how some of the colors bleed into another section such as the gray into the dark gray. It looks unfinished as a result.

The sky background is confusing to me since there's just black stippled star texture/brushes instead of white luminescent dots unless this is a style thing which I find barely tolerable because it just looks very cluttered otherwise. It makes the perspective of the image confusing since those black stars are brought up to the front and thus eliminates the sense of space between the character you've drawn, the buildings, and the sky.

I'll give you props for the challenging and dynamic position you've drawn your character in. Your anatomy isn't too bad, but always practice, practice, practice, so that you can achieve more consistency. Do you draw your character without clothes before adding on the costume? If not, it might explain why the right leg looks more slender then the left when both should relatively be the same size even from that angle. It's very important to draw a basic outline of a person before you lay on the clothes.

Lineart is alright, but again practice some more so that it really tightens and creates a stronger picture. The line weights are inconsistent in some areas such as the building and the girl. Why should the buildings have the big bold outlines when they're at the bottom of the composition? The girl's outstretched palm doesn't need to be boldly outline either since its position is eye-catching enough already.

Aaaand that's my two cents from just looking at one picture. I think it would help other people here if you show more examples of your work so they can make a more well-rounded critique instead of just looking at one image. Also, check out our Art Resources thread to look up more references and tools that can help you improve as an artist. Good luck!

[Obscura]

Shading would help as MaiMai said. And cleaning up the building. I have a complete layperson's eye with regards to art though, so your stuff looks all right to me (if you wanted to know a layperson's opinion.) Only that hair in her face seems like it's in awkward position.

[Lux Nero]

Right, first off, thank you so much for showing respect while giving critiques.

To answer your questions:

1) I do draw them without clothes before I add armor, clothing and etc. Just tends to get a little messed up when I do clean up.

2) This isn't a complete piece, hence why there isn't any real shading to it. My apologies for that.

3) And I'll post other works of mine - Both sketches, completed pieces and etc.

First an inked sketch or two:

Second, a couple completed pictures that I made with a program that I'm still a little shaky on:

And an example of a sprite I made:

[Nuxill]

Yelling at someone for doing something wrong is rude. I don't think anyone here would do that to you. Here we all want people to get better and be able to produce the best work they can.

The biggest thing that pops out at me, besides the things that have already been mentioned, is that four of the five fingers on the characters hand are creating some sort of tangent. You might want to move the hand a teeny bit or edit the hair lines a bit to get rid of those. This is what a tangent is if you don't know what I'm talking about

Two other big things that pop out are that the perspective of the helmet is off and the top of the gray part of the shoes is completely different on both feet. With the helmet you can draw a box before you start to help you imagine it as a three dimensional object.

Also I don't think you need the action lines. You could remove them and the character's movement would be just as powerful as before. The hair you've drawn shows the motion well and captures a nice moment of right before everything starts to be affected by the force of the wind rushing past you as you fall. I guess you could call it an in media res pose?

Otherwise I really like this piece. The patterned background is very cute, and if you do decide to add shading I think using the color of the sky would be a great color choice. I highly recommend that you shade the figure because your linework is busy and with that spotlight it would introduce some lovely depth. Also it might be good to put some sort of pattern overlay on the character and the buildings to have them fit better with the background.

And one last thing- the color scheme of the character is nice but you might want to add a tiny bit of color to that gray. Neutral gray is best in black and white pictures, but it will 'dull' the picture out when you're working with color. Everything has a bit of color in it, even if it's white, black or gray.

Sorry for the wall of text, but I hope this helps you out a bit. Good luck on finishing that piece!

[TheGuraGuraMan]

The woman makes me think of the editor mom in Keroro ^^

[Lux Nero]

Yelling at someone for doing something wrong is rude. I don't think anyone here would do that to you. Here we all want people to get better and be able to produce the best work they can.

The biggest thing that pops out at me, besides the things that have already been mentioned, is that four of the five fingers on the characters hand are creating some sort of tangent. You might want to move the hand a teeny bit or edit the hair lines a bit to get rid of those. This is what a tangent is if you don't know what I'm talking about

Two other big things that pop out are that the perspective of the helmet is off and the top of the gray part of the shoes is completely different on both feet. With the helmet you can draw a box before you start to help you imagine it as a three dimensional object.

Also I don't think you need the action lines. You could remove them and the character's movement would be just as powerful as before. The hair you've drawn shows the motion well and captures a nice moment of right before everything starts to be affected by the force of the wind rushing past you as you fall. I guess you could call it an in media res pose?

Otherwise I really like this piece. The patterned background is very cute, and if you do decide to add shading I think using the color of the sky would be a great color choice. I highly recommend that you shade the figure because your linework is busy and with that spotlight it would introduce some lovely depth. Also it might be good to put some sort of pattern overlay on the character and the buildings to have them fit better with the background.

And one last thing- the color scheme of the character is nice but you might want to add a tiny bit of color to that gray. Neutral gray is best in black and white pictures, but it will 'dull' the picture out when you're working with color. Everything has a bit of color in it, even if it's white, black or gray.

Sorry for the wall of text, but I hope this helps you out a bit. Good luck on finishing that piece!

Thanks dood, and everyone else, I'll be sure to post the final version at the end, I may need to redraw the whole thing from scratch, but hey, I love to draw and it'll be good practice.

[Taleweaver]

"Critique my art" threads go into the Personal Art forum, so I moved this here.

[Lux Nero]

-shrugs-

In any case, I did a little editing and even redid the pic slightly, so tell me which one you guys think is better:

[TheGuraGuraMan]

The hands should be longer, she's a woman after all, looks at this :

[Nuxill]

The first picture feels kind of overly busy and a bit blobby because of how dark the shadows are and how thick the lines are. The pose is nicer than the one in the second picture but it's creating an almost tangent with the top of the buildings, so you'd probably want to move it down. The shadows on the hair and tail in both pictures don't make any sense with where the light source is located. I think it would be good to get some reference pictures for them, wether you make them yourself or find something online.

Also, don't shade with black and highlight with white. It makes your image look dull. I suggest using a cold shadow and a warm highlight, like a nice purple blue and a yellowy orange.

If the second picture is the one you're going with I have to say it's a good improvement over the first picture that you posted in the thread. There's still some things that can be fixed up but you're getting there!

[Lux Nero]

The hands should be longer, she's a woman after all, looks at this :

While that's true...

She's actually a dood.

to quote a famous fish-headed commander - "It's a TRAP!"

[joo]

The hands should be longer, she's a woman after all, looks at this :

That looks quite handy... (pun intended) ^__^