Sina's Art from 0 Thread - [critiques/red lines Please!]

[SinaAzad]

Hello everyone,
I recently started to work on a short VN as my uni AD project , and I'm totally a noob when it comes to drawing , specially backgrounds ! here is the background i finished recently (and it is also my first work).

I would love to get some feedback and suggestions to improve my works. critiques are welcome

UPDATED with a New Background !

[Cakey]

It's nice. I like feeling that it gives. When i look at it immediately feel cold.

I would work more on tree on the front. It looks unnatural if it is wild nature. In towns/gardens they sometimes cut them in certain shapes so it may look similar but in wild they are more slender/not so branchy. Also it depends on spieces so don't worry about that very much.

And if characters will be colorful I would consider adding some colors to background but i really like it how it is

[SinaAzad]

It's nice. I like feeling that it gives. When i look at it immediately feel cold.

I would work more on tree on the front. It looks unnatural if it is wild nature. In towns/gardens they sometimes cut them in certain shapes so it may look similar but in wild they are more slender/not so branchy. Also it depends on spieces so don't worry about that very much.

And if characters will be colorful I would consider adding some colors to background but i really like it how it is

I can totally see your point , the tree looks a bit ... am , naked at the moment ... I will try to add some branches to it , doing that has the possibility of me destroying the whole thing tho :p

the character is going to be dressed white , I will try to finish it and add it to the background today.
Thanks for the feedback.

[SinaAzad]

A new background I Just finished drawing :



I'm way behind my schedule ! I'm Doooooomed !

[cath-mg]

Loving the snow effect on the second bg! Although I feel as if the gates are too far apart? It looks as if they won't meet in the middle, if that makes sense.

[Kia]

I got few suggestions if I may.

[SinaAzad]

I got few suggestions if I may.

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The attachment Screenshot_2.jpg is no longer available

Thanks for mentioning the problems !
I ended Up changing some parts of it and made a completely new logo. moved the chimney to the side and added frames to the door and changed the overal shape , as it looked more like door of a spaceship instead of a cabin + cleaning up some other parts.
about the character , I'm going to redo it all over soon !

Loving the snow effect on the second bg! Although I feel as if the gates are too far apart? It looks as if they won't meet in the middle, if that makes sense.

yeah , it totally makes sense ! I have drawn this BG from a real picture , and even in the real picture the doors look as if they wont reach each other in the middle !

[SexBomb]

So far it looks like you're off to a really good start... And I will admit, I didn't even notice that the gates don't look like they would actually meet when closed. Of course now that it has been mentioned, I definitely see it. Maybe increasing the size off the gates would help? The Chimney definitely looks better moved to the side, and the door is a big improvement.

I only have a few comments, but most of them are in terms of colouring. Right now the piece seems very grey--even if that is the look you are going for, I think the piece could benefit greatly from some additional colour, likely worked into the shading. It looks like you have just taken a darker shade of the base colour to apply your shadows. I would recommend a shade of purple or blue, to really bring out the atmosphere. You don't need to push it all the way, even just a touch might do the trick.

[SinaAzad]

So far it looks like you're off to a really good start... And I will admit, I didn't even notice that the gates don't look like they would actually meet when closed. Of course now that it has been mentioned, I definitely see it. Maybe increasing the size off the gates would help? The Chimney definitely looks better moved to the side, and the door is a big improvement.

I only have a few comments, but most of them are in terms of colouring. Right now the piece seems very grey--even if that is the look you are going for, I think the piece could benefit greatly from some additional colour, likely worked into the shading. It looks like you have just taken a darker shade of the base colour to apply your shadows. I would recommend a shade of purple or blue, to really bring out the atmosphere. You don't need to push it all the way, even just a touch might do the trick.

It makes me very happy to hear your opinion
Oh , I have seen people shading in purple or blue when they are drawing characters , I have tried it few times but failed ! I think using purple would really give more life to the pictures , I'll try it out , saying that i cant find any tutorials related to that ! It's making me crazy !

I'll add a new work in the coming days , there are so many things that I should learn , including the use of textures ( I'm done with drawing every single pixel by hand ! it doesn't work ! ) and adding rays of light which i'm trying to do right now.
If i could learn the right way of shading that would be great too, thanks for the advise !

and about the door , I may actually try to change that , as i mentioned before even in the main picture it looks as if they wont reach in middle ! I'll have to talk to the designer of that thing !

[SinaAzad]

And at last I'm done with the 3rd Background ! took me a good time making it as I had to learn a lot of stuff , also the moving the file between Clip Studio Paint and Photoshop was A pain , not to mention the 2 times which I saw the Blue Screen Of Death in middle of my work and I had forgotten to save my progress !( Looks like PS can not work normally when My laptop is on battery ! )

[SinaAzad]

Finished drawing one of my 2 main characters, at last ! had to study a lot of stuff ! and this is my 5th try at drawing a character.




I think I will put this here as well , all my tries in creating different characters , from day one.




First one ... Oh God !

[CSV]

That is a pretty fireplace background, and regarding your five character attempts, that's clearly some quick improvement, particularly on the face. =)
A bit of critique: the arms and legs look a bit shapeless; it's difficult to explain, but it's almost like they look cylindrical when they should have more varying forms (if that makes any sense). A similar thing happens with the bottom edge of the skirt. It should have more movement, even if it's not a pleated skirt.
If you don't mind me doing a redline (because it's easier to show that way:)
[attachment=0]Redline.png[/attachment] It's not perfect, but something like this is what I meant.

[SinaAzad]

I edited the legs and the skirt which improved the overall image a lot ! I also changed the hands as much as I could without destroying the whole thing (which is i'm quite skilled at !)
the skirt ... I'm really happy with it now ! I will remember how to draw it , I hope ! Thanks a lot @ CSV

UPDATED IMAGE :




I think I should remove the purple shadow from legs >.>

[shwippie]

It's really amazing to see your drawing progression! Your character has improved so much. About the purple shadow, it would make more sense if she was flipped the other way or if the shadows were highlights instead, since the sun in the room looks like it'd be hitting her back, where you currently have shadow. It would also help the character blend with the background if the background also had some purple in the shadows. If your intention was to have her stand out, then please ignore those suggestions! Nice job overall. I really like the light from the window.

[MaiMai]

Question: How tall is the sprite supposed to be in relation to the fireplace? I have a feeling that while it's big, the sprite in relation to it still seems small.