Alphabetize: A short visual novel by me

Because less is more: Noncommercial games of < 1 hour playtime and < 2 month development time.
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2OfHeartsGames
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Alphabetize: A short visual novel by me

#1 Post by 2OfHeartsGames »

Tonight is the beginning of my hobby of creating visual novels! Here I present to you, Alphabetize, a short visual novel about 2 kids stuck doing chores after class.
That's all I'm going to say about the plot, but here are some notes about it's production:
It was made in its entirety in 1 night, by me. It's currently 6:20 in the morning. :shock:
The art is NOT mine, it belongs to TyranoBuilder and Deviant Art user miririri, I used both of their demo packs, so thank you very much.
Don't hold back when it comes to criticism, I'm wholly looking forward to it, and would love for you guys to help me edit it!

I see it as still being a work in progress, because I'd quite like to get an artist or 2 to help with back grounds, characters, and scenes. I still consider most of them to be place-holders, and REALLY want to expand on it.

:Here is the download:
http://www.mediafire.com/download/vd5fx ... c0/tmp.rar
/\DOWNLOAD/\
\/Screen Shot\/
GameShot.png

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Ikuze
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Re: Alphabetize: A short visual novel by me

#2 Post by Ikuze »

So, I decided to play through it, because I'm thinking of working on my own first VN soon, and I had some free time. :)

To be honest, it felt quite rushed. I mean, I know you did it in one night, but that's just it. I didn't really get to know either Terri or even my own player character for that matter. They seem like interesting characters, but the dialogue was very fast to end and most of the time we were just reading the main characters thoughts. Not saying I don't want to listen to his thoughts, because what the main character is thinking is an essential part of visual novels, but his thoughts were very mundane.

Oh, and of course the glaring error... I couldn't finish it.

You might want to consider trying out Ren'Py, or looking up some tutorials for this Tyranobuilder. I have no idea if it's your fault or something wrong with the application itself, but after making the correct choice to get to, I assume, a good ending, the game just froze. I couldn't advance the text, exit to the menu or do anything else, so I had to quit, and reloading didn't change this, so I can only get the two bad endings. Like I said, I've never used Tyranobuilder and have no idea if this is your fault or not, but you might want to look into that, because you always want your VNs to be possible to finish. :wink:

That problem aside, it was good for a first effort, and I hope you expand on what's already here to, one, make it completable, and two, practice your skills.

Good luck!

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