A Mysterious Note [WIP, GXB] [Demo!]

[Snow Blossom]

Oopsie, I didn't see that we needed to answer three questions. D:
1. Jiseung and Minho all the way~ XD
2. As I said in my other post, the self-destruction error. XP
3. As I said in my other post, cute, and it ended on a nice, suspenseful note!

[manga_otaku]

Right, I finished playing the demo just now.

My favourite character would have to be Sujin and Minho. Sujin cracked me up with her enthusiastic "let-me-collect-the-surveys-to-find-out-info" part and Minho's personality was just cute. I love how he's such a pushover when it comes to Eunmi xD I also enjoyed Kibum's face when it came to sushi :3

Problems with the demo...well the textbox annoyed me a bit - like it was slightly too big and covered the characters slightly too much. It also began too close to the edge which annoyed me. Sorry. I'm a freak. Also, there were a few spelling mistakes but I'm sure you'll proof-read or get a proof-reader to go through it for the actual release of the game

The demo was great, but it was strange how abrupt it entered and finished. Maybe put a pause at the beginning and end? And if the demo ends then you can maybe make a scene where it tells us in some way that it's finished?

Yeah...just my thoughts

[Death_HUG]

Yaay the demo!! It was quite cute overall, but I when I hit Preferences in the Main Menu, it suddenly "encountered a terminal error" and self-destructed. D:
Btw, I absolutely adore the piece of paper Sujin handed Bora. The chibis are so cute ^o^
Also, it might be a good idea to make a sprite for the mystery mastermind - something like an outline that's filled in with black, maybe?

I didn't know the preferences self-destructed >.< I'll fix that >.>;
I'm glad you like that piece of paper....it took me forever to draw it ^-^
Yeah, i was thinking about that but...I got to lazy to make an outline, but I'll probably do it later in the future.

Oopsie, I didn't see that we needed to answer three questions. D:
1. Jiseung and Minho all the way~ XD
2. As I said in my other post, the self-destruction error. XP
3. As I said in my other post, cute, and it ended on a nice, suspenseful note!

You didn't have to answer the questions if you didn't want to XD
lol you still have a strange taste XP and thanks!

wow i love your game.
1. My favorite character is Oh Seunghyun
2. I don't think you need to fix anything
3. The demo is great, it has a good cliffhanger
Can you let me know when you expect the game to be completed, i'm so looking toward to it

Thank you! Um...I'm not really sure when I'm going to be done with this game, but hopefully by next summer ^-^

1. Who's your favorite character and why? Eunmi and Kibum. I usually don't like violent girls, but I understand why she does what she does. XD I like Kibum because of his obsession with sushi. I laughed about the just tell him there's sushi in the kitchen line.

2. Is there anything I should fix? The textbox. I don't know how to describe it, but it seems...off. Also, only if you're able to, draw unique backgrounds or find someone to do for you. This can be forgiven though since I imagine it'd be pretty pricey, but maybe just a few?

3. Your opinion of the demo? I enjoyed it! The characters really made the story for me. In my opinion, they're the most important aspect in any visual novel. I critique I have about the plot though is how...calm Bora seems about the whole situation. I would think she'd be as downright scared and worried and having the thought of what's happening to her parents occupying her mind.

So concluding my incredibly short post, I enjoyed it! Will play its full release.

Thank you very much! I'll try to draw a few backgrounds, but I'm not very good at it >.>
I guess Bora is calm, I'll try to fix that ^-^

Right, I finished playing the demo just now.

My favourite character would have to be Sujin and Minho. Sujin cracked me up with her enthusiastic "let-me-collect-the-surveys-to-find-out-info" part and Minho's personality was just cute. I love how he's such a pushover when it comes to Eunmi xD I also enjoyed Kibum's face when it came to sushi :3

Problems with the demo...well the textbox annoyed me a bit - like it was slightly too big and covered the characters slightly too much. It also began too close to the edge which annoyed me. Sorry. I'm a freak. Also, there were a few spelling mistakes but I'm sure you'll proof-read or get a proof-reader to go through it for the actual release of the game

The demo was great, but it was strange how abrupt it entered and finished. Maybe put a pause at the beginning and end? And if the demo ends then you can maybe make a scene where it tells us in some way that it's finished?

Yeah...just my thoughts

lol glad someone likes Sujin XD
I'll fix the textbox, and it's okay, I don't mind ^_^ Actually I have a proofreader, but sometimes I pass over her changes by accident >.>; but when I release the game I'll probably have beta-testers to look for spelling errors I missed.

[Wright1000]

For someone who is making a VN for the first time, the story was really great. But I hope you check your spelling and grammar before releasing the full version. And why not add some music too?

[eternal eclipsea]

That's...creepy XD Why would you want a DNA tracking device....in phone form?

Oh and the demo is finally up! Yay! ^-^

Pff. Who wouldn't want a DNA tracking device in phone form? Helloooo. If you get raped and smack the rapist with your phone then hide it, you can totally track him down later. Oh yeah. That's logic. XD

And BWAH! ONce again, lovely game so far. *wants to proofread too* Ahem. anyway...

1. You know who my favorite character is. XD Not really any reason why... He's hot. (anime-style. LOL.)
2. *coughs* not answering...
3. GREAT! Keep working hard and it'll be an awesome game!

[Death_HUG]

For someone who is making a VN for the first time, the story was really great. But I hope you check your spelling and grammar before releasing the full version. And why not add some music too?

Thank you. I still have to find some music that match with my VN, so I decided to put in the music before I release the full game.

That's...creepy XD Why would you want a DNA tracking device....in phone form?

Oh and the demo is finally up! Yay! ^-^

Pff. Who wouldn't want a DNA tracking device in phone form? Helloooo. If you get raped and smack the rapist with your phone then hide it, you can totally track him down later. Oh yeah. That's logic. XD

And BWAH! ONce again, lovely game so far. *wants to proofread too* Ahem. anyway...

1. You know who my favorite character is. XD Not really any reason why... He's hot. (anime-style. LOL.)
2. *coughs* not answering...
3. GREAT! Keep working hard and it'll be an awesome game!

... That actually makes sense 0-o
lol, yeah you can be a proofreader too XD
Yeah, I actually remembered who it is! and that's not a good reason XP

[eternal eclipsea]

... That actually makes sense 0-o
lol, yeah you can be a proofreader too XD
Yeah, I actually remembered who it is! and that's not a good reason XP

Why thank you.
YAY! I shan't let you down! Maybe..
And yes it is. It's a great reason.

[Death_HUG]

... That actually makes sense 0-o
lol, yeah you can be a proofreader too XD
Yeah, I actually remembered who it is! and that's not a good reason XP

Why thank you.
YAY! I shan't let you down! Maybe..
And yes it is. It's a great reason.

Okay, I believe in you >3> maybe.... I'll send you a pm later.
Pft, well, I guess it could be great reason...

[azureXtwilight]

So I've played the demo game and I'll give this thread some of my comments

Minho seems like the guy whom you seem to like the most since he has most screentime, I guess you might want to balance them a bit. I really hope you'll put some music though. The game's pace is quite well, and the people seems not to go OOC but I don't really understand why the principal acts like that. I'm thinking "Whoa, this school will go down in a seconds." But they have people from other countries so that kinda does not make sense at all XD

I don't know if this counts as a spoiler, but there's the KIBUM on the prolouge and the KIBUM on the sushi bar and suddenly I go O.o Is that intentional or not?
Favorites: I like Eunmi. She seems like a badass girl~ XD
I like Minho too, because he doesn't seem like a delinquent to me... I guess it's like he's a big brother who does everything her sister says and he's quite friendly too. I was glad he's not quite of a jerk. One jerk is enough (It's like the other way around, Bora's the jerk with the heart of gold and Minho's the one who snap her outta it LOL) XD Maybe I'll change my mind when I see more of the others.
Hates : Kang Jiseung. I hate boys who only things about appearances. Those boys are so shallow! GRR HE REMINDS ME TO SOMEONE WHO DATED BY BFF AND--NVM.

Everyone else seems OK, methinks.

Good job so far, keep it up!

[manga_otaku]

I don't know if this counts as a spoiler, but there's the KIBUM on the prolouge and the KIBUM on the sushi bar and suddenly I go O.o Is that intentional or not?

It's intentional...well I think I read somewhere on here that it was intentional x)

[Death_HUG]

So I've played the demo game and I'll give this thread some of my comments

Minho seems like the guy whom you seem to like the most since he has most screentime, I guess you might want to balance them a bit. I really hope you'll put some music though. The game's pace is quite well, and the people seems not to go OOC but I don't really understand why the principal acts like that. I'm thinking "Whoa, this school will go down in a seconds." But they have people from other countries so that kinda does not make sense at all XD

I don't know if this counts as a spoiler, but there's the KIBUM on the prolouge and the KIBUM on the sushi bar and suddenly I go O.o Is that intentional or not?
Favorites: I like Eunmi. She seems like a badass girl~ XD
I like Minho too, because he doesn't seem like a delinquent to me... I guess it's like he's a big brother who does everything her sister says and he's quite friendly too. I was glad he's not quite of a jerk. One jerk is enough (It's like the other way around, Bora's the jerk with the heart of gold and Minho's the one who snap her outta it LOL) XD Maybe I'll change my mind when I see more of the others.
Hates : Kang Jiseung. I hate boys who only things about appearances. Those boys are so shallow! GRR HE REMINDS ME TO SOMEONE WHO DATED BY BFF AND--NVM.

Everyone else seems OK, methinks.

Good job so far, keep it up!

Thank you!
Actually Minho is my third favorite >3> but yeah, he does have a lot of screentime. I wanted to balance it but I really couldn't firgure out how T-T But right now I'm trying to give the other guys some more screentime.
I plan on putting music in the game. ^-^ (maybe I'll release a second version with music and some more dialogue ;D)
I'm glad the characters aren't OOC! The principal is actually really responsible O-0 plus he has a really strict secretary.
Yeah, Minho really didn't seem like a delinquent, probably because Eunmi is always there XD
Yay! Someone hates Jiseung XD

I don't know if this counts as a spoiler, but there's the KIBUM on the prolouge and the KIBUM on the sushi bar and suddenly I go O.o Is that intentional or not?

It's intentional...well I think I read somewhere on here that it was intentional x)

yep, it's definitely intentional.

[RemnantDream]

1. Who's your favorite character and why?: Minho and Astor. They're both just.. cool xD I don't like Jiseung as much as I did before but he's one of the top ones. Aand Eunmi is my favorite girl. She's so easygoing.
2. Is there anything I should fix?: As others have said, the textbox
3. Your opinion of the demo?: It was nice and cute. The prologue surprised me but I liked it. It was very cute ^_^

[Death_HUG]

1. Who's your favorite character and why?: Minho and Astor. They're both just.. cool xD I don't like Jiseung as much as I did before but he's one of the top ones. Aand Eunmi is my favorite girl. She's so easygoing.
2. Is there anything I should fix?: As others have said, the textbox
3. Your opinion of the demo?: It was nice and cute. The prologue surprised me but I liked it. It was very cute ^_^

Thank you!
I never really thought Astor was cool XD and out of all the girls, Eunmi seems to be liked the most, well I can see why... >.>
Yay! I'm glad the prologue was suprising! ^-^

[Tag-]

Played the demo recently, and I thoroughly enjoyed it 83


My favourite guy would have to be either Astor or Minho, I enjoyed their personalities, (even though Minho was able to

beat that guy up so easily. Real fights are a lot harder xDD''

). I also liked Kibum for his love of sushi. It reminded me of an excited little kid running around giddily going 'eeheeheeheeee'

And of course, Eunmi was my favourite girl, because as soon as Sujin started talking I wanted to punch her lights out. If I met a real girl like this, I'd slap her across the face.
....-Ahem-
I didn't like Yoonmi much either, considering the only interaction we had with her was a glare and accusation xD''


The textbox also bothered me a bit, as the text wasn't aligned with the lines. I was also very surprised with Bora's reaction to all of this. She seems so calm it almost seems as if she's used to this sort of thing. Wouldn't she be scared and worried? Because I know I certainly would be @_@''


Overall, I enjoyed this prologue. The story is interesting, the art is cute, and I'm very much looking forward to how this plays out~

[Death_HUG]

Played the demo recently, and I thoroughly enjoyed it 83


My favourite guy would have to be either Astor or Minho, I enjoyed their personalities, (even though Minho was able to

beat that guy up so easily. Real fights are a lot harder xDD''

). I also liked Kibum for his love of sushi. It reminded me of an excited little kid running around giddily going 'eeheeheeheeee'

And of course, Eunmi was my favourite girl, because as soon as Sujin started talking I wanted to punch her lights out. If I met a real girl like this, I'd slap her across the face.
....-Ahem-
I didn't like Yoonmi much either, considering the only interaction we had with her was a glare and accusation xD''


The textbox also bothered me a bit, as the text wasn't aligned with the lines. I was also very surprised with Bora's reaction to all of this. She seems so calm it almost seems as if she's used to this sort of thing. Wouldn't she be scared and worried? Because I know I certainly would be @_@''


Overall, I enjoyed this prologue. The story is interesting, the art is cute, and I'm very much looking forward to how this plays out~

Well, Minho is

the most feared gang leader (even though he doesn't act like it XD) so I thought he would be able to finish the fight really quickly XP

lol, I can actually imagane Kibum doing that >.<
Yeah, truthfully I like Eunmi the best too XD
The text and the line weren't supposed to be aligned, I just added the lines because the text box seemed boring without it >.>
Yeah, I think I made Bora a bit too calm, I have to fix that DX
and Thank you! My wonderful friend just gave me some amazing ideas today (stupid writer's block >3>) so I actually made some progress! Yay!