I Need Your Critiques (Update: I'm Using Your Critiques)

[izukwon]

I don't know if you still need the criticism but I'm here to provide you some resource that helped me on my art pilgrimage journey.
The time I lay my eyes on your art, the thing that irk me first is the body proportion. As time goes, I see that your art has become better, but the proportion problem still retain, albeit less problematic. What I see from the proportion is that they are lacking the definition to make them look 3d and there seems to be a problem on how you draw muscle too.

I'm not a good teacher so I think I'll give you the resources instead, pictures could speak better :3

The tutorial on muscle part, their behavior etc. on this website is really helpful. It helped me study anatomy better. And it's really detailed too (but the tutorial is not about drawing the muscle, it just gives you insight on the muscle proportion)

http://www.getbodysmart.com/ap/muscular ... /menu.html

and here is the tutorial on clothes folds that helped me out too

http://www.mightyartdemos.com/mightyart ... adley.html

and lastly, this nifty litle site could help you with poses and anatomy study as you can rotate the pictures and there's a lot of poses already.

http://www.posemaniacs.com

Well then, I hope this helps. Good luck on your art journey, all the best for you

[MaiMai]

I think I have a critique for Penny and in fact for your other sprites... there's no lines defining the eyelids! And I really think you should try different sized eyes, they're starting to look same-y there and the way they look is kind of... creepy. Like there's no depth or expression to them except for looking vaguely smug (remember the eyes are the window to the soul)!

The Phobs tutorial I linked you has good example of expressive eyes.

[Obscura]

Hey, thanks very much guys.

One small thing I should mention about my sprites...I intentionally have them look blank because I like to keep them...um..."totally neutral" until I start coding their expressions in. That's probably not the best way to do it, but for some reason I'm more instinctively comfortable with that process. It's probably why my sprites look more lifeless than they should...

Oh yeah...eyelids. I think Auro already mentioned that and I've been completely forgetting them. >.< I think what happens is when I add eyelids, it immediately becomes a style I'm not really fond of...I dunno why. I think I just need to play around with this more.

Anyways, I guess I'll play around with the eyes for a bit. And try to find an eyelid style I like...

Izukwon, thank you for the tutorials; I do go to posemaniacs when I have a chance. Believe me, my anatomy right now is a staggering improvement over what I did in January. But yeah, I still have a long way to go. (The arms throw me off a lot.) But the tutorials you posted are exactly what I need.

[fioricca]

helloooo I have been stalking this thread over the past few days and this is simply one of my favourite threads ever because it's like watching magic happen o/////o I have been benefiting a lot of the resources and tips that others have thrown to help you myself, so it's great. Obscura, you've been improving so tremendously and you practice so diligently that it's inspiring! I'm really happy to see you improve, you totally deserve it. Kudos and keep up the good work!

As for Penny -- I'm actually struggling with girls myself (I like 2D men, so I've drawn more men than women...), so this is an opinion from someone who is in your boat, haha. There's marked improvements from the first time you posted her sprite to he latest one; I noticed that you've softened out her features (muscles of arms are less defined), her shoulders are more balanced, and you've also detailed her eyes. Her waist has thinned and her, um, waist? bum? has also thinned to follow that. You're on the right track; someone told me once that when drawing girls, it's important to emphasize the eyes and lips as that's where a lot of communication happen. Detailing the eye -- darkening the eyelid and all that, for instance -- lends to enhanced feminity. I think one of the reasons why Penny still feels a bit guyish is because of that... area... underneath her right arm... lmao idk anatomy so I don't know what that area/muscle is called, but that muscle definition don't usually exist for girls. Like --

If you look closely at torso shapes, the female's curve sort of follows the ribcage, but the male has a weird sort of muscle that bulges around the same area. Yeah. Penny looks like she's got that definition, so I'm sure that she'll look more feminine once you fix that |D Another thing I'd do is thin her neck a little.

Echoing everyone to say that you're doing really fantastic!! Gogogo!!

[Obscura]

Aw thanks, fioricca. That's really an awesome diagram there, thanks for posting it. I'm gonna have a good look.

And I'm glad the thread is helping you. Cuz' that would be sad if all this effort from about 30+ people is just going into a single person's art education, wahaha.

Anyways, since I've been drawing non-stop for an entire week (outside of working my job, sleeping, eating and walking the dogs), here's a doodle that has no ties to my game whatsoever that I am inflicting on you fine folks because I can.

*Note: I would not have been able to draw this terrible cartoon a week ago. It would have actually been far worse.

** P.S.S. Fiorica--and I forgot to mention thank you for all those tips about Penny. And your words of encouragement mean a lot to me! Thank you!

[fioricca]

HAHA I love that doodle! He has such a great smile!

And no worries at all! Sometimes, we get a lot of feedback about what is it we're doing wrong but not enough on what we're doing right ^^; Both are important, so I try to include both.

[FatUnicornGames]

I like the newest Penny a lot.

[Tetiel]

What type of body type is Penny? She looked bigger in her previous incarnation, but then again, she was in a sweatshirt so it's hard to tell! With how thin her waist and hips are, her arms typically wouldn't be that big. That being said, if she's more of a pear shaped body and you thickened her hips a bit, the arms would look better. I think next step would probably be backlighting.

I edited your image a bit, forgive me for not asking first. I just figured it would be easier to show you what I mean. Basically, wider hips, slightly thicker waist make the arms feel much more natural. Otherwise, they would need to thin out, show more of the armpit at that pose. I also added (very poorly) an example of some backlighting. Light very rarely only comes from one source and it's usually very soft light from the back or side. This is mostly reflected light off of some surface so it can come with a variety of colors, but to make it easier, you can use the base shade. It helps your image "pop" more. It might be too complex for the style that you're going for, though.

Also want to add that I am extremely jealous of the pace you are improving at. Mind blowing, really.

[Obscura]

@ fioricca
:-*

@ Crystal
Thanks! One eye length between eyes, right? Sometimes I forget. I also have a thing for alien heads, I guess.

@ Tetiel
I would love if you put the image up! Please do!

(FYI for anybody who wants to fix my art and post it, please go right ahead. I believe it's actually the most efficient way to see what I'm doing wrong.)

[Tetiel]

/facepalm

I thought I attached it, sorry.

[Obscura]

What type of body type is Penny? She looked bigger in her previous incarnation, but then again, she was in a sweatshirt so it's hard to tell! With how thin her waist and hips are, her arms typically wouldn't be that big. That being said, if she's more of a pear shaped body and you thickened her hips a bit, the arms would look better. I think next step would probably be backlighting.

I edited your image a bit, forgive me for not asking first. I just figured it would be easier to show you what I mean. Basically, wider hips, slightly thicker waist make the arms feel much more natural. Otherwise, they would need to thin out, show more of the armpit at that pose. I also added (very poorly) an example of some backlighting. Light very rarely only comes from one source and it's usually very soft light from the back or side. This is mostly reflected light off of some surface so it can come with a variety of colors, but to make it easier, you can use the base shade. It helps your image "pop" more. It might be too complex for the style that you're going for, though.

Also want to add that I am extremely jealous of the pace you are improving at. Mind blowing, really.

Give her womanly hips, thank you...I'll see what I can do. I think part of the problem was that I was drawing dude after dude after dude for the past few months and only two women who were always dressed in baggy clothes. (My men used to look super feminine before I started working on this game...now look what happened. )

Oh wow, Tetiel, thank you, that backlight looks amazing. I felt there was something "off" about the way I was shading. I dunno if I can handle backlighting but I'll see if I can incorporate it.

Note:

Geez, I'm really quite flabbergasted by all the help I'm receiving here. I'm so grateful, thank you so much everyone. If you want to know my story...I was pretty much interested in art when I was younger but you know the deal with parents, especially immigrant parents...they like to make sure their kid gets a degree in something "useful." (And I didn't do that either ...but that's another story.) So basically I haven't really drawn with this much focus for, um, twenty years or so? And back then I always had problems with anatomy and color and shading, etc.

So anyways I guess I feel like I have an art education being handed to me right now, pretty much the education I never got but always needed.

Anyways, you guys are the best. *cue violins*

[Obscura]

All righty, I'm gonna come back to Penny. In the mean time I did a line drawing of Alex again, in an attempt to work on my anatomy and posing.

I didn't like Alex IV because he looked like a supermodel. So I changed his face thusly. If Alex V looks more like a porn star, that's success in my book!

\O/

Your thoughts, good or bad...please share them. In the meantime I'll enjoy Alex V's brief existence before he gets the inevitable do-over...

[Tetiel]

Don't worry, if you can handle drawing men like THAT, you can handle backlighting. Just remember that it is often subtle and is usually around the opposite direction of your previous lighting, thus well... backlighting lol. Here's a good example from a friend of mine (he has drool-worthy guys all over his gallery):
http://fav.me/d4zzm3b
Notice also that his shading takes on a slightly green color from the forest. The chin has a high contrast area of light next to shadow. Everywhere you go, when you have some free time, you should be staring at things intently, studying them. See how the light reflects off objects, where the shadows go, where the lightsources come from. It's a lot of work, but hey, it makes time spent waiting productive

You know, the nice thing about art is that you don't always need to go to university to do it well. It helps, in fact it helps a lot if you have a good professor, but self study and critique from a community can go a long way.

[TakeOverWorld]

Just want to chime in and say how much your art has improved And also, in the most recent picture of Alex, his left hand looks way too big.

[FatUnicornGames]

Agreed, he is getting 'Yaoi Hands'. ;D